Let's see how to properly behave with an alcoholic? First, you should never try to fight an alcoholic not for his sake, but for yourself. The fact is that in such a case, close people can not correctly choose the behavior model. They begin to behave in such a way that, instead of improving, they lead a person to deterioration. Moreover, it may happen that the family will not be less alcoholic, but more.
For example, in many families, people who are close to drinkers begin to behave like nannies. This is absolutely not right. The fact is that such nannies always try to patronize the alcoholic and never, to anyone and under any circumstances, do not tell what exactly happens in their family and what problems overtook the loved one. Most often, wives of alcoholics do this. They rush with alcoholics, as if with small children. When they go to drinking, such wives are looking for them around the city, they are dragged out of taverns, taken away from friends. Naturally, drinking people react to this far from joyful and grateful. Such nannies receive huge portions of hatred, aggression, and even beatings. But, still, do not change the model of behavior. Even when a person is sober, they constantly try to patronize him. Thus, a similar type of women wants to save beloved men from drinking-bout. Women are ready to take on all the household chores, raise children, earn money, if only the alcoholic did not drink. But, this behavior does not improve, but only aggravates his situation. To not make such a woman, a man will still start drinking again. Moreover, the ladies themselves get used to the fact that one must live that way. Even if they are getting divorced from drinking husbands, it is not uncommon for women to get married for alcoholics and addicts a second time. Many consider it karma and cross. But, in fact, everything is much simpler, and most importantly, it can be fixed. It is just necessary to change the type of your behavior and learn to perceive the person who has alcohol problems differently.
In order to really help a drinking person, rather than aggravate his condition, you need to remember a few fairly simple rules.
The first of them: the alcoholic himself must realize his problem. He must understand that vodka really prevents him from living. For this to happen, you need to learn not to take his problems on yourself. Do not try to solve something for him. Himself done - let him look for a way out. Do not give his debts, justify at work, and so on. Also, you never need to alcoholize alcoholics to make them feel better. Hangovers help a normal person who once a year has drunk a lot and he needs a little alcohol in the morning to recover. But, this alcohol will never become an occasion to enter into drinking. And the alcoholic is different. Even the minimal dose will lead to the fact that he will forget about everything and will simply start drinking.
Also, if you are in contact with a person who is trying to stop drinking, never promise him anything that, in the end, you can not do. In addition, they never threaten them with anything, while not carrying out their threats. In this state, people become like children. They need both to encourage and punish. Therefore, if an alcoholic who stops drinking, keeps and tries, of course, praise him. But, if he returned to the bottle, try to fulfill all his threats. For example, if you promised that in the case of another binge, you will take the children and leave - and do it. He should know that you are not just threatening, but are capable of doing things. Only in this case, your threats will act, as a person will begin to worry that if he breaks down, you really will bring it all to life.
In addition, next to alcoholics you can never drink yourself and have a positive attitude to alcohol. If you yourself are a person who does not mind drinking, even very moderately, the alcoholic will cease to perceive you as an authority. The fact is that for all your words and comments, he will say that you are also drinking, and he is no worse than you. Also, with alcoholics, never speak of alcohol negatively. But, at the same time, in no case is it worth to beat the dishes, shout at the person and make hysterics. In this case, you will only achieve that he gets angry and goes on drinking, explaining that he has terrible stress because of his wife, who does not understand him at all. Therefore, in such cases, it is necessary to behave very calmly and judiciously. Do not succumb to the provocation of an alcoholic. Talk to him not with emotions, but with arguments. The conversation should be objective and logically completed. Moreover, one should not dwell on the usual formal promise of such a person to stop drinking. This will not be enough for you. You need to make sure that he knows: with the next breakdown, you definitely take certain radical methods.
Never hide the problems of your loved one from others. Naturally, you are ashamed and unpleasant, but it is this concealment that leads to the fact that a person does not worry about how others will treat him. Therefore, if he is disgraced, let people know about it. Let him feel contempt, because for many men this is almost the most terrible. Also, try to do something with an alcoholic. Just do not impose on him. Just remember that he loves, what interests him, what people miss when he is in a sober state. Take advantage of this, go to the cinema or with him, talk to his old friends who will not drink with him and make him drink with them. Of course, you can not do it all at once, but if you gradually pull a person out of the circle closed by alcohol, then, in the end, you will definitely get it.