As practice shows, many now happy fathers, for a long time could not decide on this fundamental step. Convince a beloved man to conceive a child is very difficult, but how to persuade a husband to keep a pregnancy becomes the most difficult issue for a woman, because getting rid of a child once, you can no longer know the happiness of motherhood.
According to psychologists, many men in the prime of life, nothing is so afraid, like the wedding march of Mendelssohn and the white roll with a pink or blue bow on the threshold of the maternity home. The most courageous or most responsible representatives of the stronger sex, yet over time, perebaryvayut themselves, get married and have children. But then they become caring husbands and loving fathers, it is important that the man himself comes to this, although a woman can help him in this unnoticed. But before you begin to persuade her husband to stay pregnant, you need to find out what is preventing him from making the right decision.
This question is in fact very serious and approach it should be deliberate and not frivolous. At first glance, a man's reluctance to have children lies in his unwillingness to take care of the baby and do not sleep at night. But in fact, this is not a simple fear of change, the usual way of life, but something more serious.
Often men before the birth of the firstborn are horribly afraid of the idea that in a relationship with a beloved woman someone will interfere, even if it is their baby.
Men also fear that his attractive, slender wife of pregnant women will become fat, lose her beauty and attractiveness, thus turning into a homemade club with unwashed head in a worn dressing gown.
To persuade her husband to leave the child becomes difficult because he is afraid that if a woman becomes a mother, she will lose any interest in earlier violent sexual relations. And, of course, that no man does not like the prospect of losing interest in sex with his beloved wife.
Men are also afraid of the appearance of a child due to the fact that an early passionately loving and caring wife will become much less likely to pay him attention. They are also afraid to feel like a useless application to the indissoluble union of "mother and child".
And if there is no money?
One of the weighty reasons why a husband does not allow his wife to stay pregnant is a financial situation that, with the birth of a crumb, will become much more complicated. Prior to pregnancy, embezzlement was significantly smaller, and wages were both for men and women. After a significant event, the provision of the material well-being of the family rests on the shoulders of the husband. Moreover, it is no secret that in our time it is very difficult to support a child.
What is a sin to hide, often the man's fears are fully justified. It only seems at first glance that a housewife woman can easily cope with everything, but in fact it is a huge work. Rarely, who from the representatives of the weak half are able to do several things at once: to do homework - to cook, wash, clean, monitor the appearance and give a huge amount of free time to the child, and still work. Such a colossal load can only stand one, or they turn to a hired nurse for help.
But if you want to give birth to a child, then take the situation into your own hands, and guided by our advice, try to persuade your husband to keep the pregnancy.
A man can not overcome his own fears himself, he needs help, a woman needs to talk seriously with him. In such a matter, as the husband's persuasion to keep the pregnancy, there is no room for lying. You can not assure the future of the pope that you are a super-woman who will cope without the slightest stress with all of the above. This position is very often losing. Because in case he believes your beliefs, the truth is usually not very likely, his further disappointment can cause extremely serious turmoil in your family.
The most reasonable and wise act is simply to tell your loved one your own idea of the problem. A man agrees to save a pregnancy only if he believes that the child or he will not be the "third extra". It is not superfluous to remind her husband of his love. Explain that it is very important for you to give birth to his baby.
Tell us that you do not plan a crow's nest for a head and an extra kilogram for the next half-century. Because it is important for you to be the most attractive and beautiful in the eyes of your beloved husband. A weighty argument will be given by the example of women who, after giving birth, became feminine and attractive.
It will also be effective to tell, the fact that women's sexuality is revealed by full measure only after the birth of the child. There is a possibility that from your lips a man can not believe, then put in the most prominent place a magazine with an article that illuminates this feature of the female body. After reading it, the husband will make the right conclusions.
Psychologists do not recommend using phrases during this conversation:
"You are a hopeless egoist";
"You do not love me at all";
"Do you even think who will help us in our old age? ".
Experts argue that such arguments will not bring a woman a victory, and even great angry man.
You can also, necessarily in a calm tone, ask your husband a few specific questions, this will help him to understand his emotions and feelings.
For example, ask a direct question: "Do you want children now or sometime in principle? ".
But it is more reasonable to ask several specific questions that will help a man understand his emotions and fears. For example, ask him a direct question: "Do not you want to have children right now, or never in principle? ". When answering that children are not part of his life plan, ask: "Does he give himself an account of what deprives you of the joy of motherhood?" "Such questions are very sobering to the male mind, sometimes even helping him change the decision. But still, if you can not understand why your husband is so resistant to the birth of a child, try to contact a family psychologist.