You are ready to spend all your savings on a gift to your beloved and dear person; ready to walk until morning, only to spend more time together; you are ready to skip a working day, despite the fact that the boss will deduct it from the salary and change the attitude towards you. You do not care, because in the head are such exciting thoughts and desires, euphoria in every cell of the brain and body, and suddenly a thought comes into your head that delight you: "We need to live together." And with this thought you no longer part.
Due to the fact that your man is as much in love, he takes this idea with joy. Of course, it is better if you subtly hint, because such news does not please all men, and so the reaction can be very different. But, you are lucky, and your loved one also strongly dreams of shared happiness, like you. And here you are in one territory ...
The first week you are enthusiastic and spend all your free time under the blanket. After a week or two you begin to notice the dirty socks scattered all over the apartment, also notice that if you get up before a loved one and run away to work, then on your return home you will find unwashed dishes, a stretched bed and an empty refrigerator. But near the TV you are waiting for a smiling man. Also what, you all forgive him for a smart smile? The case, of course, is yours. But! Having done this one day, be prepared for the fact that soon it will begin to repeat day after day. And then you should not blame your husband, only you are to blame. After all, in the modern world, most couples have long lived by the principle of sharing household duties.
If you do not put the question squarely, do not talk to your husband about this problem, then consider that you are stuck in the Middle Ages. Modern women have long been pulling on their fragile shoulders all the burden of household duties. If this is a problem for you, you need to find its root and destroy it before it's too late.
As a rule, wives decide to do everything in the house on their own, if their parents lived on the same principle, and my mother brought up her daughter with the perception of a man as a supreme being who should not do anything about the house, moreover, he needs to serve everything on a saucer blue border. Are you also going to raise your husband like this?
Then we go further. The situation in your family is quite understandable if the mother was a housewife, and the pope earned money and had enough for a decent life. The opposite situation is very similar to yours, if your mother resorted to work and rushed to the kitchen to cook something, while her father was reading the newspaper peacefully at that time. Such men are called domestic tyrants by women. And that, you want to achieve the same success. If not, then sit down at one of the suitable moments near the husband (when there will be dirty dishes, laundry and empty fridge) and offer with a serious air and a soft tone: "How are we going to share our household duties? "This phrase will take him by surprise, you, without changing face, explain the situation, the best use is pity. Tell me that you are exhausted at work, that today you have a car breakdown and you do not have any strength to deal with life, but you are like a loving wife ready to cook an omelet for him, while he will wash the dishes. He will not be able to turn around, just not enough arguments. A typical signal for men: "I worked the whole day! ", But since you have already used it, he will not dare to repeat it. If your husband is of that type of men who consider it shameful to wash dishes and iron clothes, then proudly raise your head, cook an omelette, and go to bed without even undressing or taking off your makeup. Having seen such a picture, a man will certainly become ashamed of his tyranny and next time he will begin to fulfill his informal obligations.
If, in response to your request for help, he raises a riot, then smile nicely and say: "Well. Since we have a medieval relationship, tomorrow I'll quit and I'll cook you cutlets for the whole day and vacuum in the apartment. " The result will not keep you waiting, even if your man earns enough money to live, he understands that you are not working for money, but because of pleasure. Therefore, it will not be able to deprive you of this pleasure.
Based on what tactics to choose, solving the problem, how to share your household duties, decide what you want to achieve from your man. You need an assistant who will sometimes spin around you in the kitchen and carry out errands, something like peeling potatoes or chopping parsley; or you need equality, so that everyone has their own household duties, and they were executed on time.
In order for your husband to become an assistant, you do not need a lot of strength and intelligence. Most men help. If your man is not one of them, then a simple request for help will be enough. In the event that you want to answer only for your duties, you will have to work on your husband. Build your relationships with respect to life, as at work in a large firm. There every employee has his own duties, which he must perform, evasion from obligations is punishable, and timely execution is a salary or a fee. In the form of a fee - pamper him with tenderness and affection, and encourage in bed: "You see what kind of you and I are good fellows, they all did it together and we have a lot of free time, which we can spend enjoying each other." This phrase will be key, your husband will not miss the opportunity to drag you into bed.
If you do not know what duties to entrust to your husband, and what to keep yourself, then do it wisely and ask him what he would like to do. It's no secret that men cook better than women. That's why in some families, women only make coffee. If you yourself offer to cook it, it can greatly offend your man, and if the initiative comes from him, then this is the norm, the man's dignity is not lost! And do not forget the main rule, praise your partners for well-executed commitments, admire them: "I could never do that! "And then he will understand his indispensability, and you will not have problems like:" Why should I do this? "