Let's talk about how to tell the child where the children are from?
Child psychologists recommend: first thing - to remove the taboo from the topic. Recognize the right of the child to ask questions about sex differences and sexual life. In many families, everything related to sex is absolutely closed and not discussed with children. Parents evade the answer to direct questions, or severely force the child to stop asking questions on an uncomfortable topic for them. This behavior of the parents puts the child at a dead end, reduces the credibility of the mother and father, and, in a more adult age, forces others to seek for themselves. Therefore, it is extremely important to demonstrate to the baby that mom and dad are ready to help understand any topic of interest.
Up to a certain age (1,5-2 years), children are not ashamed of their nudity and are not very interested in a stranger. By the age of 3 the child makes a discovery: the girls are not arranged like boys, and uncles are not like the aunts. Children with interest consider representatives of the opposite sex and ask their first questions concerning the obvious difference in the structure of the genital organs. Approximately at the same time, one should expect the child to question how he came into being. Therefore, it is so important to know how to tell the child where the children are coming from.
If the kid raised a "ticklish" topic on a visit, on a bus, or in another inappropriate place for that - you need to promise that, say, in the evening, when you return home - explain everything to him. And (ATTENTION!) Be sure to keep the promise.
It makes no sense to talk about a stork with a cabbage under his arm, flying into a store, where "zanedorogo" children are sold. In any case - a person learns how everything was actually. And, in a matured child, there may be reasonable perplexity: the parents told a lie. It is not necessary to waste children's trust so frivolously. It is not at all difficult to discuss the main issues of sex with the child, if you prepare in advance - after all, the parents' answers should be sincere and sound confident.
Talking about gender differences, about conception and the birth of children follows language accessible to the age in which the child is: figuratively, clearly and without loading unnecessary details. "A baby grows in my mother's tummy, it's like a little house for the tiniest kids, and when it gets a little bigger - it goes out through a special hole" - a child under 5 years old is usually satisfied with such explanations.
Most often, to be interested in the way children get into the mother's tummy, the child starts later - to 5-6 years. Here, stories are becoming actual that when an adult wants to give birth to a baby, the father "transplants a seed to his mother, from which the baby begins to grow." By the age of 7-8, the child can already be given a little more information - to explain the meaning of the words "penis", "womb", "vagina", "sperm", "egg". The process of conception can be described approximately as follows: "A woman and a man who love each other and want to have children before they go to bed kiss and hug.And then - the man inserts the penis into the woman's vagina and the sperm meet the ovum." The fastest spermatozoon merges with an ovum, from this it begins to grow and turn into a baby. "
At the same time, regardless of the age of the child, the answers should be truthful and that fully explain the essence of the matter.
It is not necessary to ignore the topic of sexual differences, conception and birth, even if the child did not ask questions by the age of 6-7. From peers he can get very controversial information. It is better to raise the topic yourself, taking advantage of a convenient moment, for example: "Look - Aunt Masha's tummy is growing - because they have an uncle Lyosha will soon have a baby." It's so cool! Do you know how babies are born? ".
It is very important that the central theme in the conversation about sexual relations is love.
For the adolescent period, the child should come up with a clear idea of the main anatomical features and physiological processes associated with the birth of children. At this time, in the discussions with parents, the main topic should be the topic of responsibility. Talk about the fact that adults enter into sexual relations, aware of the consequences and taking responsibility for their own health and possible children. Discuss what is threatened by unplanned early pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases. Tell us about different methods of contraception. But, it should be emphasized that no method is one hundred percent. Raise again the theme of love in the relationship of the sexes. Convince the child that entering into a sex life "out of curiosity" is likely to bring only disappointment.
12-15 years - the period of puberty and the most "vulnerable" age. It's great if a teenager with full confidence treats his parents. However, girls - it's easier to discuss "awkward" topics with the mother, and the boy - with the father.
Books for children about the human body and sex life appeared in our country in the 90s, and, at the present time, their assortment can plunge the confusion of the most "advanced" parents. Before you buy another "Encyclopedia of sexual life for children," be sure to read the full text of the book to avoid unplanned "surprises". Do not, also, completely shift the function of enlightenment of the child in matters of sex on books. A lively conversation with close people will allow the child to clarify all the incomprehensible moments.
Rejoice, if a child asks "delicate" questions for you - while he does so, you can be sure: you are the first circle of trust. Do not push it at this moment. Lost trust is very difficult to recover. Authority in such matters should be precisely the parents, and not friends from the yard.