The crisis of 3 years is one of the most crucial in the development of the child. By this time the kid clearly begins to understand that he is a separate, independent person, begins to apply the pronoun "I", individualize himself. During this period, the social relations of the child with adults begin to change. Crisis is most often complicated by the fact that the maternity leave goes on, and the baby is left with a nanny or try to quickly identify in the garden.
Many parents note that by the age of three the child's behavior has become unbearable, he does not obey, he tries to do everything his own way, says "no" at every step, is capricious and can throw a tantrum.
Characterized by the crisis of 3 years of age, the presence of certain symptoms. Psychologists have identified several basic signs that characterize the presence of your baby is a crisis of three years of age.
- Stubbornness.
In the crisis period - this is one of the most striking features of nature. The child stubborn for any reason, just like that. His main aspiration in this period is the achievement of the required, and not the desired. If the mother called the child to eat, he will say: "I will not go," even if he wants to eat.
Parents, trying to raise an obedient child, try to "re-direct" him, order him, put pressure on the baby. This behavior is far from the best way out of this situation. The child, trying to rehabilitate himself, will provoke even more such situations, trying to show his "I".
- Negativism.
It manifests itself in the desire of the baby to do the opposite, even against his wishes. Sometimes parents disobey the child as negativism. When a child does not obey his parents, he acts as he pleases, satisfying his desire. With negativism, he goes against even himself. Negativism usually appears only with parents and close people, the foreign strangers, the child obeys, behaves calmly and easily.
Sometimes the child's negativity looks ridiculous: he expresses his disagreement so strongly that, by pointing to the dog, he says: "not a dog," or something like that in this spirit.
- Stubbornness.
The child begins to express all kinds of protests, not only against his own desires and the will of his parents, but also against the existing way of life. He protests against the adopted rules, does not agree to perform the usual actions (he does not want to brush his teeth, wash).
- Self-will.
This is the desire to perform all the actions and operations independently, despite the fact that he does not have the skills or the strength to fulfill them.
Very often the child is forbidden to do the bulk of the operations - this should not be done, let the kid see for himself that it is beyond his power.
- Depreciation.
This is characterized by the fact that the child, who yesterday expressed affection and love for parents, close people (grandfathers, grandmothers), today begins to call them different bad and abusive words. He also ceases to like his favorite toys, he starts calling them names, and sometimes they throw, break, tear.
During the crisis, the behavior of the baby is unpredictable, impulsive and directed mainly negatively. It is a small destroyer who tries to control his parents in every possible way, to defend his point of view, he wants his wishes fulfilled. With the child, hysterics and sharp mood changes often happen.
What do parents do during the crisis 3 years?
When it comes to the crisis of three years, this should be understood as a change in the behavior of the child, which can occur in the period from 2 to 4 years. There is no specific time frame for the manifestation of the crisis, when the child will gain the necessary knowledge of knowledge, when he starts to think about individualization and self-determination, appropriate behavior will appear.
It is necessary to have patience, to think only of the good. After all, if the baby does not pass this crisis in development, then his personality will not be fully developed. A turning point is needed both for the kid and for the parents, who should change their point of view about the child, perceive it as a more independent and adult person.
Help to overcome the crisis can patience, love and faith in the ability of the baby. You need to remain calm, despite all the vagaries and hysterics of the child. It is useless to prove or explain anything to a crying and screaming child, you need to leave the room if you are at home, or take it away from people if you are in a public place. In the absence of spectators, the child calms down, because he has no one to show his concerts to.
It is not necessary to be too authoritarian in education and you can not let a child manage you. Always try to agree, offer the baby an alternative, together come to a mutual decision. Your baby is already a person, he begins to realize this, by his example show him that a mature, adult person will always find a solution to any problem and a common language. After all, your parental task is to grow a mature, harmonious personality, and not obedient and hunted in all people.