What is my second half? Is there really an ideal or is it an illusion? Do you represent clearly with whom you want to live life? And what do men think about women and vice versa? Let's try to answer these questions.
"Unresolved mystery", or the dream of men about women.
Most often for men it is more important to have a career (business and similar options), and a woman is simply obliged to help them in moving up the career ladder, creating a homeliness and giving birth to children ... What should this woman be for life? Is there an ideal woman in the representation of a man? Or is it a myth? Let's try to find out.
Twenty-year-old student Andrei answered the question about the ideal woman that she exists, but everyone has his own idea of the ideal, depending on education, the environment, etc. "For me, the most important thing," the young man reasoned, "is the inner world, and the appearance should be pleasant, so that there is no disgust. Over time, of course, the exterior changes, and the inner world with the person is always, and you feel it.
Vasily, 21, dreams "that the girl, and afterwards the wife was a tall brunette with long hair, kind, had a pleasant appearance, honest, so that you could trust her, and most importantly - with a rich inner world." As Vasily says, he often gets acquainted with attractive girls, paying attention to appearance.
The thirty-year-old Andrey, who already has experience with women, is sure that "first of all, there must be mutual understanding between husband and wife." (Yes, mutual understanding - it is relevant for couples who have lived together for 1 to 7 years). "The ideal woman," the young man believes, "should cook deliciously, guess the man's desires, drive a car, and in appearance - be neat. And in general, for a man should remain a mystery, a zest. "
- And my other half, - joined another Andrew, - should have Aphrodite's body, smile - Mona Lisa, eyes - Cleopatra, and character - Margaret Thatcher. (Incidentally, the character of the "Iron Lady" rather frightens off her men than attracts).
Men stingily described their ideas about the ideal woman. Valery, 53, said briefly and clearly: "I do not believe in ideal women. A woman should have everything in moderation, but the most important thing is that love and the relationship between husband and wife should prevail, so that the woman is faithful. "
Of course, for every man an ideal woman is her second half. And with a short survey of several men managed to make a general portrait of the ideal woman. So, She is a pleasant appearance, with a rich inner world, must cook deliciously, guess the man's desires, be true, be able to drive a car, while remaining for the stronger sex an unsolved mystery.
Opinions of women about the "strong field", or "women choose".
What kind of second half do women need? In the Middle Ages, it was believed that a man should be a real knight - a blue-eyed blond or brown-eyed brunette with long curly hair, courageous, strong, enduring and that a woman feel close to him as "behind a stone wall". Times were changing, but the ideal of the handsome hero remained in the centuries, but there were heroes and with a not very attractive appearance ... So gradually in the minds of women the ideal of a real man was formed - strong, courageous and attractive. Later, this ideal moved to television screens ... It exists in the representation of women and now, only in our century it is complemented by other features: in addition to the educated, strong, purposeful, self-sufficient man, the woman wants to see in him a partner - intelligent, generous, sense of humor and the like. And the ideal changes with age.
Two fifteen-year-old Julia, whom she met in the park, dream to meet children who would be similar in appearance to the idols of the current youth from the covers of glossy magazines. While their features or habits do not reflect the girl's habits. It is true that at this age they pay attention to appearance.
Elvira, 23 years old: "I do not believe in ideals, because I believe that every person has shortcomings, but we fall so in love with men, (it's invisible to us) that we close our eyes to them. First of all, a person should be generous, intelligent and with a sense of humor. Each girl has her own ideal of a real man, but everything is so different that ideals also differ. "
Alena, 40 years old: "At our age, a person should be a friend with whom you can talk, who would have the desire to help, because you want to feel his support, so that he could put his shoulder at the right time. But do not forget about romance, because the need for this even in 40 years has not disappeared, I want to give flowers. Over the years, values change. For example, appearance does not play an important role, and more attention is drawn to the relationship to each other. "
Therefore, the ideal He is: a man with the appearance of handsome from the cover of a glossy magazine, that is, attractive, generous, intelligent, with a sense of humor, romantic, reliable, which can provide a family and appreciates his wife.
Opinion of psychologists.
Psychologists say that with the development of scientific and technological revolutions, the psychological culture has decayed, and the image of ideal people has changed for the better. Previously, the image was influenced by the moral qualities of a person's character, and already today - money. About 10 years ago everything was 50 to 50. The concept of ideal people is different for everyone. Of course, the relationship between spouses varies with time, and this is normal. Well, if the husband and wife turn a blind eye to each other's shortcomings. If there is no compromise between them, conflicts are emerging that could lead to a divorce. "
American psychologist W. Harley studied several years of thousands of married couples and came to this conclusion regarding the expectations of each partner. Expectations of men against women: sexual satisfaction, an attractive wife, housekeeping, moral support for her husband. Expectations of women regarding men: tenderness, romanticism, caring, communication, honesty, openness, financial support, family loyalty, participation in the upbringing of children. According to Harley, often the failure of men and women in building a family is due to ignorance of each other's needs.
So, it turns out, that the ideal is based, first of all, on satisfaction of own needs? Or is the ideal the harmony of the inner and outer worlds? And if this harmony is not even in nature, what about the human being! The questions remain rhetorical.