It has long been known that wise thoughts come to mind after the fact. For example, everyone seems to know the proverb "Friendship is friendship, and service is a service," but almost every one of us had to face the temptation to bring someone else to work as a new employee. Or, on the contrary, go to work for a company where one of the friends or relatives is already working. And every time we seriously consider this idea, instead of immediately abandoning it ...
IN THE PLANE OF ILLUSIONS
Let's think, why can the idea of ​​cooperation with familiar people come to mind? Probably because such a layout seems controlled and predictable. Once the character of a person, his abilities are known and we are satisfied, it means that it will be easy to work with him. Alas, it often turns out quite differently.
* If we have not worked side by side with our friend, so we know about his creative potential and professional skills, not all. After all, our ideas about him are formed largely from conversations with this person. But people are not always able to give themselves an objective assessment. Someone praises himself, trying to increase self-esteem and (or) his "specific gravity" in the eyes of others. And someone understates their abilities, because they suffer from an inferiority complex. Yes, and we ourselves, having fallen under the charm of a pleasant personality, sometimes we are oh, as biased.
* All those qualities that you "experienced" in the process of communication (responsibility, perseverance, efficiency, etc.), at first glance, are not subject to doubt. But, firstly, the same person at work and out of work can behave absolutely differently, especially a man. Secondly, in relation to you a friend can show himself quite positively not because he is such a golden man, but because you personally like him. Or do you have ties of kinship, but how little ... In short, with familiar and unfamiliar people, almost all of us behave differently. Friendship obliges.
Hence the moral: it is likely that your superiors or your colleagues will not share your views on the personality of a friend by getting acquainted with him. That is, you risk ruining your official relations and your authority. After all, any oversight made by the new employee you quoted will automatically be treated as your fault. You brought something, you answer. This is an unspoken rule, but most people think unconsciously.
HAND AND FOOT
In addition to the inconsistencies in the opinions of all the parties involved in the situation, there is another typical problem that lies in wait for those who decided to "please the native man".
* By bringing a friend to your company or company, we lose some of our freedom, unless, of course, nature has awarded you 100% pofigism. Not only that at first you, in addition to your professional duties, should also work as a "guide" - to introduce a new person to all necessary people and places, you also have to make decisions every minute: with whom to go to drink coffee or have dinner, as with You can talk. After all, if a friend is a friend of your home, you need to be very careful that your family secrets do not "surf" in the service, and office - at home.
* If one of your colleagues by the time the new employee arrived has used your special location, then an outbreak of "jealousy" is possible, a struggle for your attention between two friends - the "aborigine" and the "recruit".
* Prepare for the fact that you will have to issue "biography pages" and brief characteristics to others as one side, and the other. And, if you do not select each word scrupulously, they can then - somehow - "swim" in the most unsuitable foreshortening.
It can not be said that all of the above slippery moments could not be overcome. You can, of course, like everything in our life. Nevertheless, the nuances that can poison existence in the situation of cooperation with friends or relatives, arise much more often than in other circumstances.
FRIENDS LEAVE UNABLE ASK ...
But, perhaps, the most difficult loss that can lie in wait on this path is the loss of a friend. It can happen in many ways.
* In some cases, friendly relations break up gradually and imperceptibly. Getting into a situation where communication does not happen arbitrarily, but is limited by certain limits - corporate interests (which may not coincide with personal ones), official ethics, etc. - each of the two former friends inevitably has minor claims and grievances towards each other to friend. Then one of the other did not support on the rug from the authorities, then one said about the family problems of the other by a half more words than we would like. Also has gone. And went ... Gradually the relationship begins to cool and from the former spiritual affection there is no trace. With friendship it is necessary to leave.
* The second possible version of the rupture is the unexpected identification of unknown qualities of a previously familiar person. Suddenly one of the friends suddenly overcomes the desire to curry favor with his superiors, climb up the career ladder, get more money, etc. And he begins to act at the expense of spiritual affinity with yesterday's friend. It is clear that everyone should take care of his own well-being himself. But it's one thing if you have to compete with people who are not too close, who are with you under the same conditions. And quite another thing, when you have to compete with a close friend, second cousin or friend, with whom they made kulichiki together in the sandbox ...
* The third pitfall is in the situation when friends are on different steps of a staircase, called "service" - initially or over time. Theoretically, everything is very simple: at work you are a boss and a subordinate, at home - friends. And practically surviving such a castling is almost impossible. The relationship with the former friend is also affected by envy, creeping into the heart with a quiet sap, and anger at oneself. One is angry that the second salary is higher and the work is cleaner, the second is angry that the first one requires in relation to himself some superfluous privileges and a more attentive attitude.
In a word, inviting a friend friend to his colleagues, one or the other will incur losses anyway. And most often these losses are completely unjustified. Therefore, it is worth giving up such a temptation. Better give him money on loan or good advice, where you can look for a new job! And then friendship is a friendship, and service to the service will not become a hindrance.