How to cope with your negative emotions

Many of us have children, so we often wondered "How can we cope with our negative emotions and the emotions of the child?" Often we are frustrated, and the reasons for these situations can be anything, for example, problems at work or failure in personal life. Having solved the problem of control before your emotions, you will be able to understand the emotions of your children.

You can not allow emotions to capture you, because this directly affects the condition and well-being of your loved ones, and most importantly, your child. If you feel how the negative overwhelms you, try to hide it from others, as well as from your child! After all, your panic and anger can be transferred to him, which will contribute to the development of the conflict.

Do you feel that you literally "boil"? Use simple tips:

1. Get away from the situation that gives you discomfort. For example, leave the room, just do not slam the door! It acts annoyingly on the people around you.
2. Moisten the whiskey and wrist of your hands with water. This will help you to "cool down".
3. If someone argues and quarrels with you, do not throw out all the accumulated anger on this person. He understands you with a specific problem, do not burden him with his other difficulties. You better postpone the conversation for another time.

And the main thing: never, do not swear at anyone in the presence of your child! Especially if your child is in the after-chapters 5 - 13 years. This age is extremely dangerous. After all, it is in him that the psyche is formed. Do not hurt her if you do not want problems later. Your baby can understand everything wrong, thinking that the quarrel was due to him. Especially in this regard, dangerous quarrels and abuse between parents.

If, after all, the conflict happened in the presence of your child, follow the following tips:

1. Talk to him. Determine the degree of mental trauma. Start from afar. Speak in a soft, soft voice that would put the baby to him. Explain that there is no guilt in this quarrel.
2. Do not be too persistent in your conversation. If you feel pushing away from your child, leave him alone for a while with your feelings and thoughts.
3. Cheer the child! Suggest a walk for ice cream or play a board game.

So, in ourselves, we figured out, and what to do with injuries (of course, mental), from you independent?

The causes of mental trauma can be determined by the following symptoms:

• closedness;
• irritability;
• frequent tearfulness (especially for no apparent reason);
• sleep disorders;
• nightmares;
• lethargy;
• the appearance of phobias.

Noticing your child's symptoms, try to find out their origin. How to do it?
Again, with the help of a conversation. The rules of the right conversation are described above. Just do not start with a sharp: "What's the matter?" Be softer. Ask about mood, well-being, assessments at school. Perhaps the problem itself will float out. Arrange the child to yourself with praise and compliments. For example: "You're good at what the abuser answered" or "of course, the teacher unfairly put you a bad evaluation, but this is his personal right."
Leave your negative and negative opinion so far with you. Saying "I warned you, now you have a problem!" Only exacerbate the situation.

If the cause of the disorders could not be ascertained, or if the child refused to talk to you about it, contact the teachers, acquaintances and friends of the child. Perhaps they know something or have noticed something that is not ordinary. But in no case do not leave the problem without a solution!
When you find out the most important thing (the problem and its causes), you can easily eliminate it.

Our advice:

1. Reason: bad grades. Decisions: explain that evaluation is not the main thing; hire a tutor; talk to the teacher.
2. The reason: a quarrel with a friend (friend). Decisions: the organization of their common outings; talking with a friend.
3. Reason: the death of a pet. Solutions: the purchase of a new; establishment of guardianship, say, over the animals of a neighbor.

Now you know how to cope with your negative emotions and the emotions of the child.
We wish good luck to you and your children!