How to make your first time a second time to bring pleasure? Here are some tips to help you with this.
Invite your husband on a date
Remember how it was once, before the birth of your precious baby. Arrange a romantic candlelit dinner. If you are very tired, you do not have to cook something special. Drink a little dry red wine - this will help you relax. Buy yourself a new sexy underwear and try to at least briefly forget that you are a nursing mother. You'll see the romantic atmosphere will wake up your desire and passion.
Try to rest a little
When you fall off your feet with fatigue and your eyes stick together, sex will seem unnecessary and tedious, a trivial fulfillment of marital duty, and therefore you will want to smear from it. So try to rest during the day. If possible, invite a grandmother to take care of the baby, and you can devote this time to yourself. And then in the evening, when you put the baby to bed, you will have the strength to communicate with your husband.
Forget about complexes
After the birth, do you hesitate to undress with your husband? Are you confused by the appearing stretch marks on the abdomen or chest, rounded forms? Do not complex! The husband loves you, as before, and very grateful to you for giving him the baby. But if it's still difficult for you to overcome embarrassment and awkwardness, make love at first with the lights off or with candles. And remember that the shortcomings that appear are temporary and because of them you should not give up intimacy.
Test the milk
Your breast reacts to the gentle touch of her husband and you have milk. If it embarrasses you, then express the milk or feed the baby before you go with your husband to the bedroom.
Go to the bathroom
If you can not relax because of the presence of a toddler in the bedroom, make love in the living room, bathroom or in the kitchen, the change of the familiar intimate situation will add new sensations, will add variety. Set up on the right way you will help romantic trifles: do not forget about candles, aromatic oils, joint taking of a shower or a bath, erotic massage. And that your thoughts during the closeness were with you, not in the room where the baby is sleeping, use the radio-nurse.
Exercise muscles
Muscles of the pelvic floor, including the vagina, are largely responsible for the intensity of sexual sensations and orgasm. A few days after birth, you can start to do Kegel exercises again. They consist in alternating tension and relaxation of the muscles of the pelvic floor. This intimate gymnastics can be done several times a day in any situation.
Choose a pose
It is better that you yourself could control the situation. In this case, you will be able to break off contact if you feel pain or discomfort during intimacy. Just do not worry, there's nothing to worry about. Naturally, at first you will not get such pleasure as before, because the seams (if they took place) will remind themselves of themselves for several more months. Explain this to your man and he will be more affectionate. If you had a cesarean section, choose postures that do not hurt the suture on the abdomen.
If you are breastfeeding, the first time you may be concerned about the dryness of the vagina, so the husband should not stint on preliminary caresses. Special means can help to solve the problem: intimate lubricants - gels and creams.
Take care of contraception
If you are afraid that intimacy can end with a second pregnancy, and because of this you try to avoid having sex with your husband, then it's worth consulting with a gynecologist. He will tell you what type of contraception is optimal for you now. The doctor, relying on the results of the examination and, possibly, some tests, will select you a reliable contraceptive. Just do not rely on the grandmother's method: while you are breastfeeding, you will not become pregnant. It's just a myth! It is thanks to him most often there are children-pogodki.
Sexual relations in each pair are built very individually. And you should understand that strict norms in this sphere do not exist and can not be. Therefore, only you and your husband can decide when to start an intimate life after the birth of your baby. The most important thing is the frankness between the spouses and the desire to go to each other for a meeting.
Your gynecologist will tell you if your body has recovered after delivery. On examination, the doctor will check whether internal seams have healed, as well as the seams on the perineum (after cracks, tears or episiotomy) or on the abdomen (after caesarean section). It is important that the uterus returns to normal, as evidenced by the cessation of bloody discharge. On average, gynecologists recommend refraining from sexual relations within 6-8 weeks after natural delivery. But every woman's body is restored in its own way, which means that all these figures are relative. And only the woman decides whether she is ready for the first second time or not.