Among the characteristics of the paternal attitude of men in an incomplete family, I would like to note that today fathers take on a large share in the upbringing and care of the child, from an early age. The reverse side of the coin is that the separation from the father is experienced by the child much harder. When there is no father near, the child has no authority, no one to establish order, to place discipline, problems arise with the formation of emotional restraint, self-esteem, self-discipline and organization are poorly developed, there are no conditions for correct sexual identification. An important point is the characteristics of the mother's relationship to her ex-husband. It happens that they never mention a father that often goes against children's memories, it is said that there was no father at all. Others try to expose their father in a bad light before the child, in other words, strike out all positive moments from the image of the father who left the family. This is a very harmful practice, because the mother understates the development of self-esteem, kills the dignity of the child - it is difficult to consider yourself normal, believing that you were born because of an unworthy person. It should be noted and praised the wisdom and normal approach to the issue in those mothers who try to distinguish positive features and shortcomings in the father for the child. As the famous expert, the founder of family counseling, Virginia Satir, says, it is easiest for the mother to impress the child that the father is "bad", as a result of which boys are often awarded with the development of inferiority complexes, and it becomes difficult for a growing girl to imagine that a man can be desirable.
Adapting to a new family way of life - life in a family without a couple is a very difficult psychological problem. For those parents who found themselves on opposite sides of the barricades, this is neither more nor less, but a real test for "adulthood." But the difficult situation forces the child to grow up and adapt faster. For him, life after the divorce of parents is a breakdown of the usual relationships, a difficult moment becomes the conflict between attachment to the father and the mother. Very seriously it is worth treating the influence of divorce on children of preschool age. Because of their tendency to age-related conservatism to maintain their usual forms of behavior and established order, children creakily accept new aspects of this situation. Dress the baby not as it is customary, and he will not rest until it is the same as before. It's no use talking about how hard it will be for him when his life changes radically.
In an incomplete family, especially when this is the result of a parent's divorce, the relationship between the remaining parent and the child can develop along the way, when parents and children are connected with each other by common experiences about the collapse of the family, resulting in suffering, pain and sadness. Insecurities, anxieties, worries, gloomy moods - this is all the negative that arises in such a family and is perceived by the child. It is also very bad when the parent emotionally throws his child, as he is immersed in thinking about the loss of a partner in life, from which the children begin to weaken with the soul and body, feeling not only the loss of the father, but also, in part, the mother or vice versa.
The big plus is the fact that there are several children in an incomplete family. If the adult environment behaves intelligently, then perhaps the older child will become an example and a guide to the sphere of social interaction for the younger. It is known that in single-parent families, sisters and brothers are more emotionally attached to each other.
Single mothers, raising children without father's participation, raise the process of education to a serious degree. Such mothers often have different fears and fears: "no matter how you run it," "suddenly a bad heredity will start to appear." Then mothers begin to behave very strictly towards the child, trying to behave as a "strict father" when communicating with the son, which negatively affects the upbringing of the child and the development of his personality. After all, children are not equally related to the maternal and paternal authority. The fact is that the father criticizes the case, and mother criticism can be associated with the child subconsciously as a refusal to love him. In this case, the child will begin to assert his rights to the need to feel loved and meaningful, using all means available to him, namely, whims and disobedience, or, sooner or later, stop his impulses, recognizing the all-round dominance of the female nature, and grow up to be a soft-hearted and passive person . Or, on the contrary, the parent refers to the child from the position of pity, saying "the orphan is unhappy," which is simply by definition everything is allowed. This position develops in the child selfish makings, which is especially undesirable for men.
In a full family, the father appears before the children not only as a parent, but also as a man and in a married life together with a woman. It is this aspect of interpersonal relationships that is irreplaceable in the case of an incomplete family. Because of this, there is often a rearrangement of roles on the principle of "a holy place is never empty." Perhaps the child will try to replace someone from family members, join a family union, become a bearer of family secrets and secrets. At an early age, this experience can have a powerful impact on the child's psyche, both positive and negative.
This topic is multifaceted, and it is impossible to disclose all aspects of the peculiarities of paternal relations among men within the framework of one article, especially given that it is an incomplete family, that is, a case initially difficult and atypical.