Particularly great influence on our lives is a favorite fairy tale. The child asks you to tell or read it again and again. Then he grows up, forgets the tale, but her schemes, models, scripts continue to influence his behavior.
Features of our fairy tales
Fairy tales are, as a rule, a product of folk art. And if they belong to the pen of a famous writer, they become popular and loved, if the plot and behavior of the characters are close and understandable to many. Fairy tales and legends reflect the typical, recurring scenes from the century to the age of people's fates or their dreams (not for nothing, for example, films about Cinderella of the "Beauty" type with Julia Roberta become blockbusters). Therefore, in fairy tales of different countries there are both similar, universal human subjects, as well as differences related to the peculiarities of the local mentality.
What are the typical stories of Russian fairy tales? Firstly, the main character rarely does anything himself - at his disposal usually a lot of magic items, all kinds of animals and creatures ready to help him. Secondly, the hero himself is a plain-looking Ivanushka the fool, at first glance a simpleton and lazy. But in the end he gets a princess and half a kingdom in addition, leaving far behind the smart handsome pretenders.
These fabulous stories are often used in advertising. Look at how many magical characters come to the aid of a potential owner of a product - they give out helpful advice, take them to wondrous countries, and Mr. Proper cleans all the floors. Advertisers try not in vain - after all, we learned a little song about how "a magician will suddenly fly in a blue helicopter", and life will become another without much effort.
Well, who does not know modern Ivanushki? Mowing "under the fool" is very profitable for us. Compassionate people will always regret, help, cheer: a colleague for such Ivan work will do, the boss indulgence will give and from some unpleasant things will save. Then you look: our fool is already a deputy chief, and already "half a kingdom" of him.
The roles of other fairy-tale characters are not less common. You can often hear stories about leaders who unequivocally "pull" the title of Koshchei the Immortal. Some women openly call their mother-in-law Baba Yaga. Almost in any collective there is a Sage who knows how to live correctly - he has advice on any occasion. Or Sisyphus is a perfectionist who pushes a rock on an unattainable mountain top again and again. Well, stepmothers turning their stepdads into Cinderella, and envious women, trying to feed the poisoned apple to rivals on occasion, have long become a part of our life.
Make a story happen ...
However, some fairy-tale scenarios are implemented in life entirely. Especially often it occurs in the fair sex. Sometimes similar fates are passed down from generation to generation: then all women of the family marry alcoholics, then all husbands leave, then they become single mothers. Why are the fairy-tale scenarios so influencing the ladies? Boys, of course, also like fairy tales. But besides this they also have a designer, a laser pistol, and football. And the girl's toys and outfits prepare her for the fulfillment of one cherished dream - to become finally a princess (at least, for example, at a wedding). And the brilliant Barbie, and beautiful dresses support the associative fairytale series.
Here are some popular scenarios of fairy tales that life itself came up with:
sleeping Beauty
Natalia is 30 years old, looks much younger and is very proud of this. She works in an automobile company surrounded by men, but is still alone. Many try to take care of her, but Natalia is very picky, she is sure beforehand: "This is not the one who I need, my soul does not lie - I do not like it either." But maybe we need to give the man a chance to prove himself somehow, especially since he invited her to the restaurant several times, to the theater, to the cinema? Natalia sighs: "I already thought - maybe we should agree once. But this person does not call anymore ... "According to Natalia's script, the Prince should not only discover it. Beauty, in the castle, but also to break through to her through thorns and thickets, having performed a couple of exploits. And then - to wake the girl with a kiss. Natalia does not like any other options. But a beauty in a fairy tale that - she can sleep peacefully! She and in a hundred years will still be eighteen. But in real life, while the Prince finds you, overcomes obstacles and wakes up with a kiss, it's time to buy a cream against wrinkles.
Little Red Riding Hood
Alina is a young woman with an angelic face. But in her 25 she managed to get compensation in the form of an apartment and a car from a married lover and fall into the arms of her future spouse, who became her savior after an unsuccessful novel. Now Alina has an intrigue with the boss and promotion on the career ladder. This is the scenario of the Little Red Riding Hood, which, despite Mother's instructions, talks to the Wolf, and then, along with the Hunter-Savior, happily stuffs his ripped belly with stones (such is the ending of this fairy tale in the original). The famous psychotherapist Eric Berne notes that "it's better for wolves to stay away from girls who look innocent." By the way, Alina's mother, raising her daughter without a father, often sent her in her childhood alone on her errands "through the forest".
Elena the beautiful
The beautiful Anya strictly assesses potential candidates for husbands - she needs a chosen one to be a real man and love her until she becomes unconscious. The corresponding status he must confirm regularly: "I want to feel like a queen next to him," she likes to repeat. From a successful young man requires exquisite gifts, numerous compliments and labor exploits at the first order of the beloved. But not all are able to simultaneously skip on the wolf, fight with the snake, extract juvenile apples and turn kisses into a frog princess. And the selection of trends continues.
Waiting for you
Each of us, even in early childhood, schedules a script for himself, which then persistently realizes. We do not even remember how we wrote this story, but it continues to live in our unconscious and control destiny. Of course, the reason for the repeated plots in our lives is not only that we once believed in fairy tales - the child has a lot of influence. Rather, even on the contrary: after analyzing recurring events, actions, characters, we can compare them with the stories of legends, books, plays.
Psychologists often ask the question: "With which artwork would you compare your life?" Even a frivolous answer can tell you a lot. And this is already a lot, because often people go around in a vicious circle, explaining to themselves that this is "destiny", "karma". Realizing that you are acting within the same story, you can consciously change the course of events - not so react to words and actions, act differently, or treat others and yourself differently. After all, either we control our script, or it's us. Taking responsibility for your life, you can make it your own unique work of art.
Psychologist's comment
At an early age, children are very susceptible. Listening to a fairy tale, the child experiences emotions of the main character - in fact this character is described more brightly and more in detail. Unknowingly the baby associates himself with him. And his life begins to be built according to a certain scenario. There are not so many of them. At one time, the famous American psychotherapist Eric Berne discovered, explored and described these subjects: Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, etc. Psychologists are considering two more today's scenario of a fairy tale, which came up with life itself - "Bambi" and "Godzilla." Playing the role of "Bambi" a woman is weak and defenseless. She is sure that love must be earned. Such despotic partners necessarily come across despotic partners, egoists, gigolos, in a word, consumers of love who are not able to give something in return. In the role of Godzilla, a woman acts from a position of strength, she seeks to control everything, makes everyone play by their own rules. These ladies are independent and powerful. They can do everything themselves, they are always ready to patronize and help. As a result, the "Godzilles" come across weak men, who do not like them well. It is very difficult to calculate and track your script. Therefore, to quickly change the situation for the better, contact a psychologist.