At the age of a child under 3, it's too early to talk about the crisis. Here you need to think about the methods of education. A newborn child needs to meet needs, over time, he needs to meet desires. And then all the difficulties begin. Parents are important not to miss the moment when the baby has not only needs, but also wants.
It does not cause difficulties to meet the needs of the child, but desires can not always be realized. The child is naughty, he starts hysterics, which manifest themselves in different ways - he attacks you with his fists, demonstratively lies on the floor, breaks and throws toys, stomps his feet, screams and so forth. And before the parents there is the age-old question "What to do?", Then they take the path of choice - to indulge or not the whims of the child. Many parents in order for the child to calm down, choose the path of concessions, and thus choose a very dangerous path. The child develops a habit - by any means to achieve the fulfillment of his desires. Parents should understand for themselves that it is necessary to stop being "kind", and it's time not only to indulge, but also to prohibit.
We must adhere to certain principles:
1. Try to be true to your word. If you told the child that you do not fulfill his desire, then you need to stand on your own. But if they promised something, then, no matter how difficult, the promise must be fulfilled;
2. Keep yourself in hand;
3. Do not go over to elevated intonations, even if you are irritated by the vagaries of the child. As much as you are not irritated by the capricious behavior of the child, react to it calmly, let him know that he will not achieve anything by shouting. If the hysterics increases, try to hug the child, let him feel your love. In a dialogue with the child, show a feeling of empathy: "Yes, I understand, and I am also very sad ...";
4. Do not turn into a hen
Encourage and greet the child's autonomy. Start with him a joint game, which until then did not cause him any interest, and when the child is addicted to the game, let him play for a while on his own.
What if the child does not obey?
It is impossible to avoid protest, you can learn to reduce the number of conflicts. After all, such disobedience is designed for an external effect, and if parents react correctly, these protests can be reduced. After all, the child does not obey: when he is forced to do what he does not want to do, or he is forbidden to do what he wants.
The kid is told to go home with a walk, and he clings to his feet and hands for everything to just walk around; he was told to eat, but he turns his head and clenches his teeth with force. Thus, he protests against the order, which violates the wishes of the baby.
Adults need to learn in time to prevent attacks of stubbornness and protest in the child. All efforts of parents should be aimed at removing tension. Clearly observed the regime of the day, the favorable atmosphere of the house, the authority of the parents will help to cope with attacks of protest. The kid should be told that he needs it, that he is loved and at the same time gives the child sufficient independence.
Parents are required to be moderately exacting to behavior, to actions and patience. The child should not be placed in too strict a frame or all the time to give in to him. Both will lead to more disobedience to the child.
Sometimes children do not obey because they are spoiled. It happens when parents prohibit a lot, but, for example, the grandmother resolves absolutely everything. This can not be allowed-an egoist who is not adapted to life will grow up. Do not obey and be capricious, and the kid, who began to fall ill, so parents should be careful about the behavior of the child.
Children of early age, due to the characteristics of the nervous system, can not always sit quietly, as adults demand of it. Such requirements cause overstraining of the braking process and lead to various serious behavioral disorders. With such a system of upbringing, children become irritable.
Often in response to the unbearable demands for them to slow down their actions, children respond with a violent outburst of their excitement, obstinately demanding the desired, throw themselves on the floor, beat their feet. Often such children achieve their own - not every grandmother, mom, can withstand such an onslaught. And this complaisance will cost you dearly: the child will understand that he is able to achieve everything with a certain amount of perseverance.
The way out is that for the child it is necessary to create safe conditions for activity, because movement is his physiological need. And parents need a lot of ingenuity. Be engaged with the child, play with it, give it enough time and necessary attention, and thus you can achieve more than if you constantly restrain and limit the manifestation of activity in the child.
Childish whims are the behavior of a child that does not go beyond the normal, but it gives many adults problems. Each child has his own personality, his character, and he expresses them in such an inadequate behavior.
The vagaries of the baby can be avoided by eliminating the source of undesirable behavior. For example, when you lay sleeping, the baby begins to knock with his crib, swinging it. The bed should be placed in such a way that it does not thunder.
Even the most disobedient child at an early age requires understanding from his relatives. It is better to ask the child to tell you why he did it. This way of communication (and not punishment!) Will help the child understand that he was wrong.
If the kid after the game does not remove the toys behind him, you need to put them in a box and hide them. Sooner or later the child will understand that if he throws toys, he can remain without his favorite games. If the child is going to pull glass objects out of the closet, you need to shift the items so that they are not accessible to the child or lock the cabinet. And you can, in response to vagaries, go into another room and not pay attention to the capricious child, but this will take a lot of time. A child aged 2-3 years can not explain his actions, and adults perceive his behavior as disobedience.
There are 3 main successive steps in the behavior of the child's parents who do not obey:
1. If a child disobeys, it is necessary to give him the opportunity to stop himself;
2. If the child continues to be disgraceful and does not calm down, the parents need to apply to him the punishment that they promised him in this case;
3. After the punishment the child must necessarily explain why he was punished.
These steps in the end will lead to the fact that the most naughty kid will think about before doing something unauthorized.
Pay attention to the child, and then his caregivers will be able to avoid many unpleasant situations and conflicts that a child can get into. After all, it often turns out that children commit bad deeds only because they attract the attention of their parents. And for this reason the child should be praised even for the most insignificant act. After that, he wants to do more good, and not commit a bad deed, which he does against the parents.
Now we know what to do if the child is naughty, does not obey. Explain to yourself that your child is a sovereign person, he, like you, has his rights, duties, but not great.