From time to time we are drawn to sexual experiments. But violating the usual scenarios is a responsible thing. What if we feel uncomfortable? Let these doubts not stop you. If the experiment proves to be successful, you will receive not only an unforgettable experience, but also anew the partner. How to diversify an intimate life with her husband? We cast off shyness and learn together.
Play a role
Anna and Gleb have long been attracted to role-playing games - in erotic films such experiments always looked very sensual and sexy. "But before I experienced some excitement over such ventures - it seemed that only very artistic couples could play a doctor and a patient or a maid and a host, who could switch completely and temporarily forget about reality ," Anna says. - That's why we did not hurry to realize our fantasies and for quite some time limited ourselves to talking. But I wanted to diversify my intimate life with my husband.
And in one day everything turned out by itself. Gleb returned home after an important meeting and, having no time, apparently, on the way to switch to household chores, turned to me with the patronizing notes of the chief. I was so excited that I decided to play along with him: pretended to be a little obedient girl. We were both so carried away by the game that we did not notice how we were in bed. It was quite a magical night. We did not do anything special, but the phrases, gestures and behavior changed: I felt myself in the seventh heaven with joy and excitement, playing an obedient young mistress. This experiment, we have not yet repeated, but both remember it with tenderness. "
"Anna and Gleb very competently approached the realization of their imagination," commented sexologist Vladimir Prokhorov. - At first they thoroughly prepared themselves: they discussed their desires in detail, learned what exactly it seems to them attractive in this experiment and what each of them is afraid of. It remained only to wait for the right moment, and as a result, everything turned out as if in a flash. "
Technical details
Olga and Konstantin were not afraid to realize the secret dream of many couples - went to a sex shop and together they chose funny sex toys. "Previously, it seemed to me that sexual prelude does not tolerate vibrators and other technical improvements - they say, everything should be natural ," says Olga. " But Kostya managed to convince me otherwise." For the first experiment we chose a special pillow for sex and a beautiful dildo. It turned out that toys do not interfere in bed, but on the contrary, make caresses much more pleasant. Moreover, it turned out that in the process we do not focus on technical details (which I, I must admit, was rather afraid of), but only concentrate more on my feelings . "
"The couple came to a very right decision: indeed, do not be afraid to use the achievements of the sex industry," says sexologist Galina Nechaeva. - Modern sex toys are easy to use, absolutely safe, meet all medical requirements and are specially created to give you pleasure and maximize the intimate life. Treat them like a pleasant entourage, because you are not confused by the muted light of a night lamp and beautiful bedding? And do not forget about hygiene: every toy needs to be washed with warm water and soap before and after sex, and vibrators and dildos should be used together with a condom and special lubricant. "
Magic Tablet
After 15 years of marriage, Oksana and Igor noticed that their sex life became noticeably poorer. Sex was rare, but about love games, lasting all night long, they could only remember. "One evening, Igor offered to use Viagra - the pill was recommended by our family doctor ," Oksana shares. - At first I took this idea with a skepticism: it seemed to me that only mediocre medicines were used in hopeless cases. But then, in paints imagining the possible result, still agreed. I'm glad I overcame my own prejudices - sex was just amazing. It turned out that the pills do not just cause an uncontrolled erection, but help maintain it all the while the man is nervous. We again got the opportunity to enjoy the process for as long as we want. Since then, every few months, we allow ourselves such a celebration of the body . "
"Of course, such drugs should not be taken by young lovers," warns sexologist Vladimir Prokhorov. - But if a man with age with problems, lost strength and yet he does not suffer from heart disease, then Viagra can be a good help. It will help diversify family sex. In the end, it is foolish not to use the benefits of modern civilization, if necessary.
But if the couple believes that the tablet can perform a miracle, then it will have to disappoint her: Viagra and its analogs do not in themselves cause excitation, but only help to start the reflex mechanisms of erection. If the excitement is okay, the pill can significantly improve the quality of sexual life, and if it is difficult for a man to get excited - most likely, he does not need a medicine, but a consultation of a sexologist. "
Change of places
Karina and Ruben have always been a "hot couple." "Most of all, we love to experiment with changing places ," Ruben says. - Especially sharply it was shown in rough youth: the excitation could arise on a visit at friends, in a night club or in the car. And recently we realized that we never tried to have sex in nature. The idea seemed tempting: it was summer, next to the dacha, which we rented, was a forest, and it has many beautiful places. We took a soft blanket, wine and sandwiches with us and went away from the crowded paths. Sex was beautiful - the body was blowing a fresh breeze, and closeness to nature gave excitement a special power . "
"Sex in a new place is the simplest way for a woman to diversify her intimate life with her husband," says sexologist Galina Nechaeva. "It's no wonder that the guys loved to change the situation. But before you have sex in an unusual place, think about what you want to get from this. For example, making love in nature or in a public place, use a condom, otherwise it may result in irritation or vaginal dysbiosis. "
EXPERT'S OPINION: Evgeny KULGAVCHUK, sexologist, psychotherapist, vice-president of the Russian Association of Sexologists.
In sexual life it is important to follow the golden mean. It should not be allowed to be like a swamp, but it is also not worth turning it into a mountain river. An intimate life should look like a beautiful lake with running water. Then it turns out to maintain a very important balance: the main thing is not lost, but the changes still happen. Novelty should play the role of accessories, and not turn into a lifestyle, because in the end you can get the so-called "emotional burnout", fatigue and disappointment. Biologically, men need more play and changes in sex. If the novelty is present, then, maintaining a permanent relationship, it seems to have a lot of women. Yes, and women often view spontaneity and novelty as a test for maintaining a good relationship. As for the embodiment of erotic fantasies, it can be noted that some of them are absolutely optional to implement. Because they are good only as fantasies and when implemented only bring disappointment. When discussing it is worth using "third sources", for example, journal articles. If the partner reacts negatively to the new information, agree with him, if he does not mind, then you can develop the discussion further. But be careful with the practical implementation: first make sure that your fantasies coincide with the views of the partner.
5 GOLDEN RULES OF SEX EXPERIMENTS
1. Everything should be natural. Do not need to develop detailed instructions that may prevent you from relaxing and enjoying the process.
2. The experiment must have a goal. Think about why you want to try this or that? To feel the animal passion? Or, on the contrary, tenderness? Or let the partner feel at the height?
3. At one time it is better to change one, at most two components of your usual script. For example, if you decide to have sex in nature, then it is unlikely that you will be even more pleased with the simultaneous development of a new posture. One unusual situation will be enough.
4. During the experiment, do not try to completely control the process. It will be better if you trust the partner and let him act as he sees fit.
5. Do not get involved in experiments. From time to time they are pleasant and useful, but only if you do not become hostages to constant pursuit of novelty. In the end, stability is also nice. And most importantly - your feelings, not new positions ...