How to become an interesting interlocutor?
The pronoun "I".
The most important thing in conversation is the correct use of the pronoun "I". When a person starts talking only about himself, even if it is applicable to the topic of conversation, the interlocutor will feel an unpleasant feeling of oppression. Do not forget that for every person the most pleasant thing in conversation is to participate in the discussion of their affairs and to hear that his name is mentioned in the conversation. The most correct way to arrange for the interlocutor is that you need to address him by name and unobtrusively learn about his life, affairs. Naturally, you do not need to completely forget about yourself, you need to be able to arrange everything as if you are talking about your affairs, cares, to please the interlocutor. Of course, you can rarely see self-praise for yourself, but when another person does it, it just cuts the ears. It happens that a monologue may look like this: "I believe that this is useful. I was very pleased. I really love everything new. " The best way to support the conversation, and become an interesting interlocutor - to monitor your conversation and not say constantly: "I", by the way, this is a minus of many people. But in the case when it is really necessary to often use the pronoun "I" in a conversation with an important person for you, it is better to try to replace it with "me", "we".
Delicacy.
Another important point in the conversation is delicacy. Perhaps you will have a question about what delicacy is involved, if the interlocutor talks about something that you strongly disagree with, or maybe it all annoys you. How can one answer cautiously in a situation where one wants to simply shout: "You are wrong!". First, it is worth remembering that blaming the interlocutor directly - is simply unacceptable. On the phrase "You are mistaken", he will be offended or angry, and in any case, the interlocutor will immediately begin to process the insult, and will not perceive what you want to convey to him. Agree, because there are times when you say that the opponent is not at all right, and in response there is a defensive reaction and response charges. Such a dispute will rarely end positively. If you want to bring something to the interlocutor who is not right, say this: "Probably, we misunderstood each other ...". Or: "Maybe I did not formulate the question well enough ...". In extreme cases, it's better to take the blame: "I should have said wrong." If the person with whom you conducted the discussion is a reasonable, well, at least educated person, he will be able to assess your words and give way in the dispute. It may also be that the opponent continues the dispute, taking advantage of the fact that you are softer, in this case, rudeness in response will be inappropriate. It is better to remain unperturbed, and later you can see the results of this.
Correct statement of the sentence.
If, on the contrary, make the interlocutor feel guilty, then you need to build a sentence like this: "I thought you were an intelligent person, but it turned out that this is not so ...". This can work more effectively, better than the phrase: "You just disappointed me." If, on the other hand, the "you" or "you" are pronounced with the pronouns, he instantly includes self-defense, and the accusation by using the word "I" will give you the position of the leader, and the opponent - a sense of guilt. Yes, and your low evaluation of his work, the interlocutor will want to challenge, but what you think will not be challenged by anyone other than yourself. The person you are discussing with will not say: "No, you do not have disappointment, you are very pleased", because it will sound illogical.
The pronoun "We".
And one more tip for those who want to become an interesting conversationalist. If you want to go to rapprochement with a person, to enthrall it, you must start by saying that in a conversation we say "we", not "I". After all, the pronoun "we" of people unites. If a person will hear phrases such as "We are currently discussing", "We are solving", "We have worked fruitfully", he will understand that you have something in common with him, therefore, you must stick together. Often this trick is used in pick-up. Pick-up - a system of techniques of neurolinguistic programming, which are aimed at causing excitement in the person you like. When people spend time together, one of the partners summarizes, says "we" and pushes the other to understand that they are a strong pair - a single whole.
Note.
It should be said that it is possible to learn how to communicate correctly with people only on your own experience, so you need to be communicative and remember the techniques described in this article, and then you can certainly become the most interesting interlocutor.