It is unlikely that any of the parents would like their child to go in dirty clothes, scatter things anywhere and leave dishes behind him in the sink. But also the ironed "nerd" who does not play with the boys, that, God forbid, not to stain the shirt, not an option. Where is the golden mean? How to teach a child to order and discipline? And the main thing is not to overdo it ...?
First of all, let's find out why we need to teach our children what? In the end, all people are different, there are also full sluts, they live, quite contented with themselves. "And here not!" - the psychologists object. There are at least several reasons why it is necessary to accustom a child to accuracy. First, the ORDER IS DEVELOPING. The child's thinking is arranged in such a way that its development occurs by ordering everything that it sees. If he constantly sees chaos in front of him, then his development slows down. Secondly, you must learn to live with people. During your life, your child will have to face many times in situations where it is necessary to exist side by side with other people. In order for inaccuracy not to prevent your child from building relationships with them, it is important to organize the life of your family correctly. Psychologists identify several principles that must be followed so that the whole family learns the rules of the hostel.
PRINCIPLE 1: Live and let live
The rules are simple: if you took something - put it back in place, if you opened something - close it, and if in
the house someone sleeps - do not make noise ... Since childhood, it is necessary to teach the child to take care of themselves.
PRINCIPLE 2: Only positive emotions
Never punish a child for not being too fanatical aspiration for cleaning. It would be paradoxical if he liked to scrub the floors or wash dishes.
Do not force the child to clean up, he should ripen to this: "I clean, because I like it when it's clean."
Come up with different scenarios for cleaning toys (for example, soft toys are sent "to another planet" - in a box).
Organize competitions (who put toys in a box faster).
DO NOT INTERFERE IT TO IMPROVE. Any child is active from nature: it contains an instinct for imitating adults. That's why he rushes to help us or copy our actions. If at that moment he hears "Do not climb!", "You're still small" or "You will not succeed", this impulse will be stopped at the root. And then you are surprised: why is he so lazy? Because it was necessary to catch the moment earlier, when he offered you his incompetent help.
PRINCIPLE 3: Everything needs to be explained
You should not only give the child a good example of dealing with things, but also explain why you do it. Only then the child will maintain order not mechanically, but quite consciously.
• Tell the child about dust: it is harmful (in the dust live ticks that cause allergies).
• Explain why you have to put things in their place: because otherwise at the right time you will not find them.
• Why should we keep everything in the same shape as it was (close the doors, do not throw open a tube of toothpaste)? Because another person also wants to take advantage of this, and he may be uncomfortable.
PRINCIPLE 4: Maintaining order should be easy
Of course, one does not need to unnecessarily romanticize the process of creating home and bodily cleanliness: things are routine and are hardly worthwhile to put their lives on. Therefore, you need to try to ensure that this necessary part of life is present in your life at a minimum. Today, fortunately, there are many ways for this. Furnish your apartment so that to keep it in order was easy and pleasant:
• Do not use covers and finishes that collect dust (carpets, carpets, draperies);
• Keep small things in closets or on glass shelves;
• Remove horizontal surfaces that need to be wiped frequently from dust;
• get a lot of boxes and containers for small things;
• Do not keep all children's toys on the surface: some of them should be hidden on the upper shelves, and when the child has already forgotten them, change the "exposure";
• in the bathroom, put several containers for dirty laundry: for white, black and colored - and explain to all households where to put it (immediately teach the child to change panties, socks, and other clothes every day if it becomes stale by smell) .
PRINCIPLE 5: Do not hurry up
The desire for order, having appeared at an early age, undergoes all kinds of changes and metamorphoses. Often children as they grow up out of chistyul turn into sluts or vice versa. This can be influenced by a variety of psychological factors. But the meaning remains one: completely the need for cleanliness and order is formed in a person rather late - by the time of full maturation of the person (about 25 years). Therefore, if your child suddenly ("It's unclear where - we are so clean"), there are not very pleasant habits, do not panic and beat all the bells. Almost certainly, if in childhood the child was laid healthy rules of hygiene and accuracy, then, becoming an adult, he will return to them. Just everything has its time. Sometimes a person needs to "outgrow" some difficult period: most often the disorder in the teen's room is a kind of material materialization of the confusion that is going on in his soul.
This table will tell you how to teach your child to order and discipline more effectively.
Age | What the child can do | How to help him |
From the 1st year | ? collect scattered toys ? pile books and magazines ? self-refer to the bathroom wet panties ? unload the washing machine (put the laundry in the basin) ? to hang a jacket on the hook after a walk | All actions to try to produce together with the child, show everything and explain it many times |
From 2 years old | ? help laying on the table (arrange dishes, lay out forks and spoons) ? help in the kitchen (stir dough for pancakes, peel potatoes in a uniform, etc.) ? wash a plate and a cup behind you ? wipe a dust with a special cloth ? water the indoor flowers ? carry a pot | It is necessary to equip a personal space for the child. A room (or a corner in it) must be arranged in such a way that each thing has its own place within it, accessible to the child |
From the age of 4 | ? to lay out in children's toys the way he likes and seems beautiful (do not disturb him and do not impose his will) ? wash in the basin their little things: a handkerchief, socks, panties ? Vacuum and stretch the floor with a mop | The child wakes up feeling beautiful: at this age it is especially important for him what the surrounding space looks like. Watch your apartment. |
From the age of 7 | ? have permanent household duties (for example, watch for indoor plants, wipe the dust in your room, wash the sink in the bathroom) ? independently monitor their appearance (take clean clothes, send in a dirty wash) ? be able to cook simple meals (scrambled eggs, salad) | Do not scold the child if he does something wrong. Give him more independence. Maintenance of order should be perceived as hard work. |
From the age of 12 | ? maintain order in common areas (bathroom, toilet, corridor, living room) ? clean your room yourself | It is most convenient to arrange an interior and buy a good technique. |
LITTLE TRICKS.
Get rid of the child from the boring duty to clean the apartment alone, it is better to do it all together: one vacuum cleaner, another washes the floor, the third wipes off dust, etc. It turns out both faster and much more fun. By the way, it is also useful for adults to adopt this good tradition and not to dump all domestic affairs on the mistress of the house.
To try their hand at being able to live with other people and not interfere with them, it is very useful for a child at the age of 10-12 to visit a children's camp. Often children come back from there as adults and more accurate.
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