Love is devoted to a lot of poems, poems, novels, films. And in each of these works of art there is talk about the love that a person carries through all his life. But is it? Do we love once and for all, or is it just a romantic illusion created by creators for young and naive girls?
What is love?
It is difficult to answer accurately and unequivocally what is love. This is a special feeling that we can not describe in words. But if you always try, then probably the main sign of love is desire to not lose this person. There is almost a physical need for him to be there. And it's not just about physical contact. Next-it does not mean to be constantly in the same room. To be next is to be spiritually spiritual, call up, correspond, just feel that this person is in our life. But if we say that love has passed, then we judge by the fact that such feelings have disappeared. So it is so, but not quite.
Love goes on different occasions, but if we easily abandon the feeling, then it was not real love. True love comes only once or twice in a lifetime. This is the feeling that is never unforgettable. Even if we tell ourselves and those around us that love has passed and we no longer love this person, in fact there is a share of untruth in our words. Often, a person is falling out of love due to the fact that the relationship is not being laid. The reason for this is either the understanding that you simply can not be together because of some vital factors, or because the person was not what you imagined him to be.
What does it mean to stop loving? This means to make your brain prevail over the heart. We find rational reasons for forgetting someone. And over time, we already stop thinking about it and live on. But to be honest with ourselves, somewhere in the depths of our soul we still have those same feelings. Simply, we are not developing with the help of meetings, new impressions and communication. We simply do not give ourselves the opportunity to think about this person. And as you know, if you do not think about something, then it fades with time. Yes, it fades, but does not erase from memory. If there is an occasion, an emotional outburst, that feeling again begins to break out. But only if a person realizes that it will destroy his life, then he tries immediately to overcome the mind with his heart and not allow himself to once again plunge into this feeling. This explains the fact that former lovers may not see each other for twenty years, they can form happy families, but if they meet again and can not contain their feelings, then love returns, or rather wakes up. It is not surprising, but the feeling of love remains even to those with whom we broke up due to negative attitudes. For example, a man treated a woman badly, even beat and, they broke up. At first, anger and hatred are boiling in it, but in time it is badly forgotten, as, indeed, good. But in the depths of the soul there is still a sense of necessity that this person should be there.
They say that love can not be controlled, but in reality it is not so. It can be controlled if there are no permanent factors that affect feelings. That's why the people try not to communicate at all or to reduce communication to a minimum with people whom they loved and with whom they parted. When a man and a woman can make friends after parting, it means only that there was no real love between them. It was strong sympathy and affection, but not love. When a person really loves, he can not always be near the object of love, because the feelings begin to get out of control. Therefore, if you have grown up with a man and offer him friendship, and he can not agree to it, then he really loved you very much and he loves you. And realizing that he does not want to hurt himself or you, he tries to reduce your communication of dominance, so that no one has to suffer. And even after decades, he will behave the same way. That is, it does not mean that it will start to completely ignore, insult, pretend that you are not familiar. Most likely, the guy will simply limit himself by written congratulations on the holidays and meeting you on the street, will smile or even embrace, but after such a meeting he will never call and he will offer to renew communication, as he knows that those who are asleep in the soul can wake up at any moment, and both of you it is not necessary at all.
Reliving Love
And yet, when we strongly love someone, then often we transfer love to the lost person to another. Moreover, we subconsciously choose this other to be similar to our love. It seems that we love him for his qualities, precisely for his character traits and so on. But in the depths of our soul, we see a similarity with that person. For the sake of this similarity, it can only be seen by us. It happens that all the people around you do not admit that your lover is in his own way an emotional copy of the previous one. In such cases, meetings with those whom we love before may not even cause emotional outbursts, because we continue to love the same person in the same way, simply in a new shell, possibly with improved character traits. It is love that explains why some women constantly choose one type of man. Or different types, whose behavior model, for some reason, becomes very similar. Some do not admit to themselves that they try to find in others the very one that they once loved. Our real first love, deep and strong, remains with us for the whole life. Unfortunately, very few people are lucky, and he gets the opportunity to go with his beloved until the very end. More often we have to hide our feelings deeply, convince ourselves that we have forgotten about them and live on. Moreover, we can create families, appreciate the respect and feel the need for those with the kemma side by side. But if you ask, the person often says: "I love my boyfriend (boyfriend), he's the best, but still, I remember how I loved ..." And it's the one that remembers the memory, her true love. And, this person can be a hundred times worse than the one with whom she is now. And she will never change this young guy. But the feeling, so strong and all-embracing, which went precisely from the heart, and not from the mind, she experienced precisely to that person, whom she remembers all her life. Therefore, the question: is love a feeling for life? - you can safely answer "yes", since the most, the most unique, unforgettable and unforgettable happens to us only once. In rare cases, two.