When dealing with different life situations, we involuntarily "include" those or other emotions. And often they are difficult to manage. However, we have at hand a superinstrument - your own body. How to benefit from it for himself, says Sayen Beilock, a psychologist and author of "The Brain and the Body."
The body maintains contact with the brain and has a powerful impact on our emotions, feelings, behavior and psychological well-being. Knowing about some regularities, you can learn to better manage both your own and others' feelings and moods. There are small tricks that will help you in this matter.- How to stop a quarrel and make contact It's no secret that the body posture expresses our thoughts and feelings. By the way the other person is sitting and moving, much can be understood. The reverse is also true: changing the position of our body and copying the posture of others, we, firstly, tune to their wave and more clearly realize their mood, and secondly, we have a man to ourselves.
Incidentally, this is why spouses who are happy in marriage become similar to each other. Scientists have found out that over the years of their life together they often adjust to their partner, copying his facial expressions and facial expressions - all in order to reduce the intensity of emotions and show their involvement, to express sympathy. The next time - during a quarrel or when just a day did not ask - try to skillfully reproduce the facial expression, repeat the gestures and posture of your second half (or parent, child, boss). There is a very high probability that this will strengthen the emotional connection between you and give a sense of closeness to each other. And in such an atmosphere to solve problems - how to crack nuts! - What to do when the soul hurts and you are lonely Striking, but the brain perceives bodily and emotional pain in the same way: the same parts of the brain structures respond to these types of pain. Probably, therefore, painkillers and antipyretic drugs have an amazing property: they muffle the mental pain caused by social isolation.
People who took paracetamol and Tylenol by courses report that they feel less lonely in their daily lives. And this research has confirmed. The daily dose of Tylenol helps to heal a little hurt self-esteem, which often happens when a person for some reason is "overboard" the usual circle of communication. - How to get rid of loneliness and help to do it to others Scientifically proved is the fact that we associate warmth with close proximity to other people. Remember that how do you feel when you get into the room, the elevator, the aircraft cabin with a lot of people? That's right, you get hot - the body emits heat.
The bodily sensation of heat or cold influences our judgments and behavior, the "sensation of asociality". And here you can turn everything in your favor. Warming up almost certainly will make social isolation not so painful. Yes, in the literal sense! Loneliness is felt as cold, so a good decision, when you are all left, is to go on vacation to hot countries, put on a warm sweater and drink hot mulled wine. This is the whole trick: when a person is warm, he feels much better and less often suffers from loneliness. Therefore, if you go on a business trip and are forced to leave the baby with a nanny, put it on a soft, warm pajamas: the flow of tears will be much less. And you can give the baby a woolen blanket and say that he will warm him apart. So it will be! - How to stop being afraid of mice, heights and anything. Over the years, we learn to keep emotions in check in a variety of situations - sadness and joy. Want an example? You are welcome. The older we get, the more relaxed we watch when someone clicks his fingers on the door. Children, seeing this scene, show horror, gasp and groan, cry out and immediately rush to the rescue. Adults are able to perceive what happened with a share of skepticism: think, bite and stop. However, there is an emotion that we can not cope with - this is fear. People even more often talk about phobia: obsessive, unaccountable fear of some ordinary things - rodents, water, clowns, balloons. The list can be continued indefinitely. But there are advantages to this, if you do not let the horror-chilling horror swallow you whole.
It has long been known that students who are not confident in their abilities and, in truth, fearful mathematicians, better cope with tests and control if they manage to tame fear. How can this be done? There is a simple trick: you sit down and on paper state your thoughts. No, no, do not rush to say that it does not work. Let me ask you one thing: have you tried it yourself? .. Therefore, continue: pour out your fears and fears on the paper, describe in detail what will happen when you meet the subject of your nightmares nose to nose. We assure you, you will have ten minutes to unload the brain and save it from unpleasant experiences. It turns out that you are losing a dangerous situation in advance, thereby creating an action plan. This is almost 100% guarantee that next time negative emotions will not become an insurmountable obstacle. In other words, spreading fears on paper, you reduce the volume of the "dynamics of horror" in your head. - How to convince people and achieve success in negotiations Today, business meetings, presentations of new products and services often take place in the virtual space. And really, why spend time and money on work to the place where a laptop with a camera is at hand. But not everything is so simple. We are so arranged that the reduction of physical distance establishes a more stable emotional connection with the interlocutor. And vice versa: the increase in distance is associated with cooling relations and even a gap. From this it is necessary to learn an important lesson.
Important negotiations should not be conducted on video communication. If you are trying to persuade a client to buy, do not be lazy to come to him in person and talk face to face: it will be easier to catch the emotional wave and come to a mutually beneficial decision. The same applies to interviews: ask a potential employer to schedule a meeting so that you can talk about yourself in a real, not online, world. Your chances of success will increase dramatically. - Emotions for pleasure And something else. It turns out that we can experience some interesting bodily sensations, and with them emotions, in a dream. After a little training, each person can learn to control their dreams, that is, to see lucid dreams. Some people say that in such conscious dreams they can engage in safe sex and even get an orgasm. This is called an altered state of pleasure.
Laboratory experiments have confirmed that both men and women can experience vivid, realistic orgasms in a dream. This is described in detail by Andrea Rock, the author of the book "Brain in a dream." The fact is that in a certain phase of sleep the body is sufficiently excited - this is a reflex reaction. And, perhaps, the brain in response to a feeling of physical arousal is an erotic dream. And those who can manage dreams, bring the process to its logical conclusion. It makes sense to learn, right?