Are you still waiting for the prince on a white horse? Well, or according to a new scenario of modern life, on a white Mercedes? And in the long evenings sitting at the window, for the hundredth time you ask yourself: "Well, why can not I find my love and find happiness?" Then this article is for you.
We tend to blame anyone for our failures, but not ourselves. But the most likely reason for the lack of luck is in ourselves. Another great Freud for the first time suggested that we are confronting precisely such people and find ourselves in situations in which our subconscious mind is set up in advance. At that time, this theory had no success, but modern scientists have proved that this is the real truth. And the assertion that the idea is material is not the raving of a mad scientist, but a proven fact.
So what about the problem of the eternal expectation of a fictional prince? Why are there so many single women around? Girls, as a rule, in their early childhood in their imagination draw romantic scenes of meeting with strangers and fabulous scenes of the subsequent wedding. By the way, Marcel Proust directly claimed that we initially attract people in our subconscious, and then we meet with them in reality. If you are still alone, there may be several reasons for this:
- Your mental picture is not clear enough
You do not imagine in detail all the features of your chosen one. And your work in the style of impressionism is incomprehensible to your subconscious. It can not guess what you meant and why do not rush or just can not translate your dream into reality.
Best of all, of course, when the image of the future husband and father of future children is created from childhood. But nothing is lost, even if you have already missed this period. Just realize that now more work and internal energy should be focused on mentally drawing a clear line from yourself to your future partner. Everything is important to the smallest detail! The color of his eyes, the density of his eyelashes, the color of his hair, whether he is swarthy or fair-skinned. Or do you prefer redheads ... What is the height of your "standard", how many kilograms of weight is in it. Outline mentally his temperament, passion, his place of work, even the size of his salary. You can do such an exercise to recreate the image of the ideal man in the morning, afternoon and night (especially carefully carry out this mental work before going to bed). And even it would be great if you took a pencil or a brush and drew it on paper. Put a picture of the man closest to your ideal, above your bed. If art is not your horse, then paint it in your imagination again and again. Remember, motivation and perseverance are important in this matter. Therefore, in order to search for the desired prince, a maximum of efforts must be made. You can also rethink and reproduce in the mind the place of your meeting. Do it again and again. Develop a detailed scenario of how you can find your love.
Now almost no one doubts the materialization of thoughts, but to become material, the thought must be clear and meaningful. It must penetrate all of your subconscious, you must think about it more than once or twice - every day, perhaps for several months. And think only in an affirmative form and preferably in the present tense.
For example: "I meet the man of my dreams ...", but in no case: "I hope that someday I will be able to find my love ..." The second option does not lead anywhere, it has no future. Thus, we smoothly came to the second reason of your loneliness.
- You lack self-confidence, you suffer from low self-esteem
Many of us in the childhood were taught to be good girls. We were told that in order to earn the love of someone, we must do this and this. Happiness and love for us began to be perceived only as a payment for a well-done job. As a result, the subconscious mind imposes a stereotype that love must be earned.
Throw this harmful thought out of your head. And if it surfaced - tear it from the subconscious, like a weed, once and for all. You do not need to perform unthinkable feats to earn love. You are so worthy of love! Accept this thought as a reality, believe in your value for other people just like that, and not for something. And treat the same as others - just be friends, just love, just trust. Do you live in this world? Thus, you are worthy of love.
Do not think that if you do something wrong, you will lose the opportunity to find love. Everyone has this opportunity, regardless of his personal qualities, age and social status. Respect yourself, love yourself, value the best in yourself. Only in this way can you attract the love of someone else.
There is another option for low self-esteem. This is the case when a woman, trying to hide her timidity and inner complexes, becomes aggressive towards others. She considers herself to be such a woman-vamp, but has nothing to do with her. Such a woman is rude, pretendly self-sufficient, and with her whole appearance makes it clear that she does not need love and guardianship. Although her whole inner world says the opposite. We - women - must remember that men will not long dig into our psychology and unravel the vague signs. They see what they see. Do not want attention of men - do not. They will not be carried away by you if you intentionally push them away. They will not waste time on your inaccessibility - do you need it? And, besides, do you need this? So disaccustom yourself from rude speech, remove ugly thoughts from your head and become yourself - become a weak, tender, loving woman.
The law of life acts like a boomerang - how much mud you pour into the outside world, as much as you will later return it. Do not let verbal rubbish and negative emotions tear your energy inner circle. You will not notice the process itself, but in the end you will reject the representatives of the opposite sex at a subconscious level, and they will disappear from your horizon.
Because of low self-esteem, we are often prone to envy. You never had to catch yourself thinking that "her hair is much thicker and more beautiful than mine", "she is so gray, and she has picked up such a handsome man" ... We should not allow such phrases to arise in our subconscious at all. This is a clear sign of a hidden dissatisfaction with yourself. Love yourself - do not envy others! Naturally, all this is for your benefit.
- You do not have the courage
This is something from the category of "luck loves the brave." Or, what is more popular - "the best defense is an attack". It's not true that a woman does not have to be brave. Who is better than you know exactly what you need for happiness? Perhaps the prince of your dreams is standing next to you and just does not dare come. Why not be, in some ways, more courageous, more risky and not tie yourself up with stereotypes to start dating?
It is not necessary to treat all men you meet as spouses or sexual partners. With many of them, only friendly relations can remain. And notice, women-supporters of strict morality do not very much entice men. Most men show no inclination to seduce them. So is it worth it to be afraid and hide your intentions to get acquainted when men themselves in secret only expect this?
- You are too strong
Yes, and this can interfere with your happiness. For example, push a person who does not fit into the ideal image of your future husband. This should not be done in any way. Let the mysteriousness and women's weak power hover around you. Although this is strange, but the weaker the woman behaves, the stronger she becomes in power over men. And this is a proven fact.
- You are too sensitive
Well, these usually sin teenagers. But sometimes such excessive shyness and shyness also passes into adulthood. You need to understand that you have already become a mature person and you can control thoughts and actions.
Very often a person offers to do something for you, but you are in a hurry to stop it, for fear that it will make it too difficult. This is one of the biggest errors of women who want to be happy and get married. Accustoming a man to your requests and solving your problems does not begin with the day of the wedding, but from the first days and even hours of relations. Someone wise said: "Men love women according to how much they have done for these women." If you take too much care of a man and do not let him take care of yourself, he will quickly get used to it and start treating you as an auxiliary staff. They love us for what they did for us - remember this. The more they put care, vitality, time, love, money into their woman, the more they will appreciate her.
- You are not self-sufficient
This also comes from a deep childhood. Your mother lived only by you - not knowing your interests. You have become the meaning of her life, you have dissolved into it. So you, in consequence, dissolve in your new partner, not having your personal life. You live his interests, you take care of him in everything, you control every step he makes - he suddenly makes a mistake and gets into trouble. With such women, men do not stay long. What to do? Just let it breathe. Do not control your man, do not play scenes of jealousy, do not completely focus on your relationship. Start your life. In the sense, communicate with friends, build a career, have a hobby. Be interesting to a man, as a person. And to myself, too.
And a few more tips ...
Despite all the assurances, however, many women do not consider it necessary to listen to these tips. But in vain. After all, men are primarily attracted to intelligent women. So it is advisable to have knowledgeable friends, read standing books, not cheap detectives and "pink" romance novels. And it would be nice to forget about the stupid TV series that go on TV without end.
And again: there is no need to try to stick to the first male man at any cost. If he does not want to be with you, then this person is not for you. You have freedom of choice, and he has freedom of choice. Remember this, put up with it. Some women are afraid that they will not meet anyone else and therefore are ready to tolerate everything.
The more suffering a woman experiences, the less respect for her is experienced by a man. It's sad, but it's a fact. Carry yourself with dignity, respect yourself, do not give yourself offense. If you think that all people are bastards, a decent person will never appear on your horizon.
Good and bad have no gender. Each of us has black and white sides, and often a person turns to us with only one side of himself. Do not rush to judge. Maybe its second side will surprise you with its cleanliness.
Abolish the chapter of unprecedented stupidity that men are less than women and therefore they need to be chased. Remember - to each his own. And live with confidence. As for your age princes enough. And do not start thinking about yourself with the words: "Why can not I find my love in this world?" It's better to say this: "I am worthy of the love of the best man in the world!"