Family for an American is sacred. There is no division into male and female responsibilities: American dads on the site are normal, not only on weekends: husbands plan a working day so that the maximum possible time is given to the family.
And the situation when my mother works, and my father is with children, also meet much more often than we do. Children are always a matter of admiration, the center of the universe. The whole family necessarily goes to all school and garden holidays.
The upbringing of children in different countries is perceived in a special way. A child is a full member of the family, he has the same right to vote in it, like the rest, on all issues. He must be respected, has the right to inviolability. They advise him, they explain everything to him from the early nails, early give full freedom of action, thus teaching them to become independent. Quiet as a buffalo, the American mother does not worry at all about the fact that the baby crumbles in the mud, freezes, jumping out on the street in December alone in shorts (because he wanted so) ... Once he decided that he could do that, let him do it. He has the right to make mistakes and to his own experience. Let him make sure that the dirt gets dirty!
back side
But these wonderful rules when raising children in different countries have the opposite side. So, proceeding from the fact that every person has the right to his own personal life and his own desires, the Americans demand that this device be respected and from babies who can not explain this. Yes, when a child learns to clearly state what he wants, he will be listened to by all means, but before that, in the conflict of interests, parents will automatically give themselves the head powers. Mom and Dad have a legal right to sleep at night, and although you get up in your crib, no one will come to you. Mom and Dad want to continue the same way of life that they lead before the birth of the child, and the baby-crumb from the maternity home is dragged to a noisy party where they give the baby to hold each of the forty guests, and will not pay attention to his reaction either. "Do not worry!" - it seems that this is the main slogan of American medicine, where the examination of a child by a neonatologist after birth may well include only weighing and determining: "Wonderful baby." Further medical observation will be approximately the same "thorough". The main criterion of the baby's health will be his appearance: "He looks so wonderful, it can not be that he was sick!"
And where is the grandmother?
We must admit that the argument with the upbringing of children in different countries in these cases is usually reasonable: well, after all, sooner or later (they took off the diaper, learned to read) ... In many respects, thanks to this, American parents are calm, like the Buddha, and radiate optimism. Not throwing fanatically into motherhood and not committing daily feats, and reasonably giving time to their needs and desires (even at times to the detriment of children), mothers retain their strength for the second, third, fourth child ... The baby for this mother is, of course, important, it may be in the first place, but the universe does not twist around it, as in Russia.
Fact
What is not exactly in America, it is the involvement of grandmothers in the process of raising children in different countries. American grandmothers in the majority - vigorous working ladies who are sincerely glad to tinker with the child on target, but no more than that
Family in Italy is a clan. Holy concept. No matter how distant a relation a person may have to his relatives, no matter how useless he is, if he is a member of the family, one can not doubt: she will not leave him. The birth of a child in such a family is an event not only for his closest relatives, but for all the others who go through the category "the seventh water on a kissel". A kid is a gift from heaven, a small deity, all of whom are noisy and enthusiastic, pampered on the spot, given up with toys and sweets. Children grow up in an atmosphere of permissiveness and lack of system, while under total control, as a result of which they grow up to be as expansive, coarse, intemperate, capricious as their parents. Surveys of tourist agencies show that Italian children are the most ill-bred tourists in Europe: they most often do not give rest to other tourists, they make noise, do not obey the elders, sloppily eat in restaurants, do only what they consider necessary, not according to the opinion of others.
In general, the Italian family, children in particular, should be allowed into the house with caution. If mom and dad quarrel, maybe they will not beat the dishes in your house ... But the raging crumbs will easily smash your native penates. After their visit, it remains the impression that Mamai walked around the house.
Complicated age
When children grow up and enter a "difficult age", parents prudently give them freedom, or rather, her illusion. At the same time, strict rules and taboos remain, limiting French children much more than their peers in America. Surprisingly, the French in the world are considered a much more relaxed nation than the Puritan Americans.
The modern Russian family is mostly a couple, primarily concerned with the financial and housing issue. A father in a Russian family is traditionally a breadwinner, a breadwinner, automatically spared from complicity in domestic chores and childcare. Formally, the mother retains the workplace until the child reaches the age of three, but in practice mothers tend to go to work much earlier - in most cases for earnings, but quite often, as well as their Western "colleagues", for reasons of self-actualization, caring for their mental well-being. In modern Russia, both traditional house-building devices (the main mechanism of influence-punishment) and Doctor Spock's theories continue to remain relevant, as well as many modern pedagogical theorists offering extremes that are unusual for the post-Soviet mentality: joint sleep, breastfeeding up to 3 years, attitude to the child as an equal ...
Fact
Nannies for many remain inaccessible luxury, and kindergartens do not always entice parents, and often the way out of the situation are grandmothers.
The French family is so strong that children with their parents are not in a hurry to part and live happily together to thirty (or even more!) Years. Therefore, the opinion that they are infantile, bezynitsiativny and irresponsible, not without reason. This does not mean that the mothers are always at home with them from morning till night - the French mother quite rationally distributes the time between work, personal interests, husband and child. For a modern Frenchwoman, self-realization and career are no less important than for other Western emancipated women. The child early goes to the kindergarten, my mother returns to work. A French child does not always find himself in the center of attention of his family, early learns to entertain himself, grow up independent, quickly grows up.
Fact French mums are usually emotional enough, unlike American, they can shout at the child, but slapping is very rare. Children usually grow up in a friendly environment, but from an early age they are told to follow strict rules: obey your mother, not be capricious, do not fight. Thanks to this they easily join the team
Take care of your nerves!
Russian parents are more nervous, see a lot of threats for the child in the surrounding world (and not without reason), worry about his future, strive to start and teach him as soon as possible, hoping that the child will go to a good institute (do not forget that most of the parents of boys want to avoid the army), do not trust doctors very much, they are accustomed to rely on traditionally adopted in their families attitudes or seek the truth in their own way, in books and the Internet.
The main features of the Chinese, like any Eastern traditional family, are the authority of the elders, cohesion, and the belittled role of women. Specificity is that due to the current situation with overcrowding by law, a Chinese family can have no more than one child. Therefore, children often grow spoiled and capricious.
The ambition, diligence and discipline of the Chinese are reflected in the issues of raising children in different countries. Children from an early age go to kindergartens (sometimes even from three months), where they live according to the rules of the collective in full accordance with accepted norms. Hard mode gives and its positive fruits: the kids start to walk early on the pot, sleep and eat strictly according to the schedule, grow obedient, within the rigid framework once and for all established rules. A Chinese child strikes foreigners on vacation by unquestioningly following the instructions of the mother, does not scandal, can sit for hours on the spot, while the children of other tourists smash the restaurant. The secret is that the child from the cradle is taught to obedience and keep him in severity.
The fact Breastfeeding, according to Chinese traditions, should stop when the child is able to bring his hand to the mouth - from this moment the kid, according to the Chinese, can already learn to eat with a spoon.
From an early age, educators and parents are diligently engaged in the development of babies, and in this the Chinese are close to Russians with our development activities for polutoratok, cubes Zaitseva and other techniques.
The Chinese do not spare the forces and resources for the comprehensive development of the child and the search for his talent, and if there is one, then a child with a grafted skill to daily work achieves considerable results.
A Japanese parent will never raise his voice to his child, and even more so, never slaps him. They still adhere to the old wisdom: up to five years the child is a god, from five to twelve - a slave, and after twelve - a friend. Japanese kid can be confident that he will always listen carefully, come to the rescue.
The secret of the tranquility of Japanese parents and the obedience of children is simple: it is only at the first unbiased view that it may seem that all is permitted to children. In fact, frames exist, but Japanese parents never raise children in public. They make comments to them, but in private and as calm as possible.
Fact
Today the traditional Japanese family turns into a modern one. Mom does not want to stay at home with the baby. Parents are busy with work, older relatives are traditionally distancing themselves, and as a result, researchers talk about the loneliness and neglect of Japanese children.
Another Japanese problem - the transition from the category of "God" to the category of "slave": in high school, worshiping the child and indulging his caprices ends, with him at school begin to ask stricter. A teacher, with whom relationships were built on the principle of friendship, becomes a mentor who can severely punish. The rules become strict and binding. When a child moves to secondary school, parents decide which higher education institution they will apply to, and from that moment the friendship between schoolchildren stops and acute competition begins. Children are seriously going through the transition from "deity" to "slave", so among Japanese students there are outbreaks of protest, as well as a high percentage of suicide attempts.
A distinctive feature of the eastern countries is the dependent role of women. She always obeys a man. The society recognizes for her the main occupation of the household and the upbringing of children in different countries. The birth of a boy always causes delight, while the appearance of a girl can lead to family displeasure (in China, for example, a newborn girl can still be given the name Big Mistake).
The variety of ancient ways of punishing children in different countries:
In Russia, as we all heard, practiced rods, leaving without dinner and standing on peas for hours. The belt and corner have not lost their relevance.
In fact, peas are an English invention. By the way, legislatively corporal punishment in Great Britain was canceled, only in 1986.
In China, they beat their fingers with bamboo sticks. In Japan, forced to stand with a porcelain cup on his head, straightening one leg at a right angle to the body.
In Pakistan, for a tiny delay, they forced to read the Koran for hours. And the most terrible Brazilian punishment - to forbid to play football ....
Education of children in different countries in Old Russian style:
A guide for spouses and parents of the Middle Ages, recognizes that children need to be loved, but encourages parents to hide their love: "Do not smile at him when playing." It is supposed that, thus raising a child, the parent can spoil it and raise a spoiled, effeminate person. At the same time the author of "Domostroi" categorically recommends parents of children "to fall asleep, punishing and teaching, but to condemn and beat them." Punishment, according to the authors, is an indispensable measure in the upbringing of children in different countries, which provides parents with a quiet, calm and respectful old age in the future. It was recommended that you show particular kindness towards your sons: "Do not be sorry, beat the child: if you sweep him with a rod, he will not die, but it will be healthier, for you, executing his body, save his soul from death ... Loving his son, and then you do not brag about it. " The main thing in the education of children in different countries and daughters was the inculcation of the notion of morality to them to ward off them from "corporal vice."
Fact
American children, unlike their Russian "colleagues", wear fewer clothes at times. The child, barefoot jumping over the November puddle or released in January on a street with bare knees, not exotic. And they do not get sick more often, but on the contrary, less often.
The rule "not to bathe" includes, in our view, as domestic heroism (three children: one mother shakes, another reads a fairy tale, and all this - waiting in the corridor from the third session), and moderate indifference in matters of raising children in different countries: an American will not, like a modern Russian mother, dig through the Internet in search of an answer to the question of whether it is harmful to her child. She simply does what the doctor or mother told her, that's all.