But your other half seems to be trying to ignore this desire, this need to make your home happy with children's smiles. All your arguments seem to him not convincing enough. And then the question is born: "And how to explain to the guy that I want a child from him? How to make him understand me, listen to my words? ". Unfortunately, it is sometimes so difficult to find mutual understanding in this situation.
And yet - how to explain to the guy that I want a child? Are there any particularly strong arguments, some phrases, weak points that can be pressed? After all, everyone knows that a woman who wants to become a mother acquires some traits of a wolf's character, which for her idea can fight to the last. However, here there are several nuances.
Before saying: "I want a child from this person," think about it: do you really want this? You personally? Perhaps you are just playing around with the public? Your surroundings have long ago told you that you have been living with your loved one for so long, that it's time to please grandmothers with grandchildren. And you are not-no, and you will think: and it's true, the years go by, but there are no children and no. And are they fleeing these same years? And are you ready for the kids? That is the question. Firstly. It is on the fragile shoulders of mothers that the main concern for the baby lies. And not only about the baby, about the "overage" baby, too, should not be forgotten: he and the meal need to be cooked, and in the house order to put, and wash, and stroke, and caress. Are you ready for all this, are your shoulders ready for such loads? If the answer is yes - well, then you can start right on the "hilling" of the most important half.
So, you've probably tried to explain to your boyfriend your desire to have a baby. What arguments did you bring? How to persuade? I want to say at once: in the majority of cases this process is long and even sometimes tedious, because few men will agree so soon to say goodbye to freedom.
I want to say right away that it's hardly worth taking a man of age. That is, if your main argument is: "We need to have a child, because we inevitably grow old, and so while we still can do something - we need to try our best!" - then it's better to postpone this conversation until the moment, until you find more weighty arguments. Of course, everything depends on your man too. There are such guys who are struggling with their health, watching and looking after the appearance and at the slightest cough they wrap themselves in a blanket and eat whole lemons. For such an argument, "health" can act, but only in tandem with some other statement. However, such men - a rarity.
At the same time, it is much more common to find such guys who, after hearing about their age, can, on the contrary, get started and even show aggression. It's simple: men mature much longer than women. If some of us already in 20 years are ready to create a real and strong family, then to men this awareness comes much later. No, they are not bad family men - and they work, and they love you, and show concern. But in my heart, as they say, they did not grow. Because they are afraid of children, they are really afraid. Because they are afraid to lose their freedom, which is so cherished. Of course, by the fact that they are married, they are already partially fettered. But these are not the ties that can hamper some customized plans. But the birth of a child is an event that can turn upside down the whole life plant. This is neither you beer with friends, nor walks with his wife until dawn. In addition, who is pleased when you say something in the style: "While we still can"? Men are confident - they can always and regardless of the circumstances. And that the child will make it very easy, but so far your family is simply not ready for it.
A significant role in the issue of offspring is played by the financial side of the situation. That's when you talk about crumbs - your husband take it and start to transfer to you all loans, debts and monthly expenses, while constantly nodding at a small salary. But the child needs so much: and new furniture, and clothes a million, and toys, and kashki, in the end! You can not withstand such a pressure of arguments and give up positions, however, in fact, there is a way out. Just tell your husband about his prospects. On the new stimulus. To begin with, look at each other: does it threaten to raise? Can he earn more? Here there are two branches of conversation, depending on the prospects of your man.
If he is an excellent worker, his boss appreciates and respects him and has repeatedly hinted at a rise in the not so distant future - then this is an excuse for you to hint that, at last, material prosperity will allow you to have a baby. And we urgently need to take advantage of this, because no one knows what awaits us even in a year! Of course, he may object that in that case he may be dismissed after a year - but you do not give up and stand on your own: they say, even if they get fired, all of his services will remain behind him, which will necessarily be taken into account when job search. And since God gave the child, then, as they say, and give to the child for him will not rust.
But if the main argument of the spouse is that he has a small salary, and he does not see any prospects in the future - you need to immediately adjust to the combat mode and go into the attack. After all, what happens then? You never have a baby because the guy will not earn enough money? It's stupid, you see! In that case, it's better to start crumbs now while you are young and you have the strength to work part-time. With funds for the first time you can help relatives (because they can the same?). And do not forget about the state aid, which, with skillful expenditure, can ease your financial situation.
We have already talked about the willingness of a married couple to have a baby. So, even if you are ready, it does not mean that it's time to start a baby. Wait until the maturity and his future daddy, because of him in many ways depends on how close the family baby. Do not be a sole proprietor - give your loved one to prepare for this event. And he will definitely come to this.
Get a puppy home - a small and defenseless, instruct your beloved to take care of him. Of course, the care that a child needs is in some ways different from the care given to a puppy. However, at least you yourself will see the degree of preparedness and responsibility of the spouse, at least her fetus. Yes, and he, perhaps, is aware of the beauty of this light feeling when someone in you truly needs. And he will offer you to think about getting a crumb.
In any case, every man has his own levers of control. And if you are an attentive and intelligent girl, then you will be able to find the right buttons and make conversation on the right track. Be extremely gentle and persuasive - and you will be able to prove to your half that without a baby in the house everything is too calm, very sad ... And that you want to change your family life by adding the brightest colors! To explain to the guy that I want the child is not such a problem, if he is attentive and caring. Well, and if not - then you have a long way to persuade, because the first time nothing happens. Have enough perseverance and patience and be ready to fight to the end for your feminine happiness!