So what exactly is the problem that your daughter is a very shy and insecure person? There are at least two answers to this question: everything consists in the temperament of a person or his upbringing. Most often in this situation, the first answer is dominant. It is uncertainty that is one of the most common traits of a person's character. By the way, an interesting fact is that this feature is inherent to almost all of us, just not everyone shows it. Insecurity in many girls is a special psychological reaction. To manifest themselves, this reaction begins, approximately, at the age of four - five years and increases after ten. Unsure girls with age can become withdrawn, not talkative and loving loneliness. Plus, all these girls have very few friends and for a long time can not find a boyfriend. And all because of their vital position is to cross out visits to various public and public places, and, in the first place, it happens, because the girl feels all its shortcomings and is very suspicious. Their own advantages such people do not see at all and do not know how to demonstrate, because they are afraid to get into an absurd situation. And all this because of complete uncertainty and foreseeing the inevitable failure in all matters and undertakings. Uncertainty is the fear of what will be. He constantly scrolls in the head at a subconscious level and becomes a harbinger of expected failures and criticism. In other words, it is the obsession that creates stiffness in everything. What can I say, not very pleasant, if your daughter is just like that. So, how to help your daughter become more confident?
Initially, it is necessary to identify the main factors that influenced the emergence of uncertainty in the daughter. One of these factors in this situation may be a feeling of constant anxiety. Here, of course, the whole problem in the upbringing of the daughter. Constant reproaches, nagging and reproaches from the parents clearly do not do anything good. The reproach is, first of all, a reminder of the shortcomings. Therefore, it is necessary to solve any situation peacefully. By the way, excessive guardianship is also capable of producing a complex of insecure people. So, everything should be in moderation.
In general, helping a daughter to gain confidence is not so difficult. Initially, pay special attention to how you communicate with your daughter. Try to spend with her as much as possible time, communicate on different topics and try to answer all the questions posed by her. Try to become a friend for the child. You can even get your daughter out to a mass event, where a huge number of people gather. The main thing is to support it there and do not leave one. Remember, the more often you "go out into people" with it, the more chances that she will begin to feel more confident in the previously unaccustomed situation.
In addition, if you want to help the girl become more self-confident, you absolutely should not compare the child with other children. For example, parents very often blame their children for saying that neighbor girl Alla dresses like a person, not that you or her have many friends, but you are sitting at home. Believe me, with these words you will never develop confidence in a child, and even on the contrary, push your child to a complete closure in himself. Your goal - to believe in your child so much that he felt it and did the same. Remember that you can achieve everything only by believing in yourself, your abilities and strength.
By the way, if you really think it necessary to make a remark to your daughter - do it alone without unnecessary witnesses, so as not to drive her into an incidental situation.
Also, in order to help the girl become more confident in herself and her powers, teach her to properly and technically defend her personal opinion. To do this, argue with her and ask her to prove her rightness to you. But do not forget to ask your daughter for her opinion and find out the main arguments why she thinks so. Only then do this with her in a discussion.
Try to teach the girl to correctly understand the jokes of others, especially boys. Explain to her that you do not need to take everything literally and especially take extra ones to your address.
Also do not forget that a self-assured person is a person who has an adequate and certainly not low self-esteem. Advise your daughter every day, standing at the mirror, to say to yourself such phrases as: "I am brave", "I am confident in myself", "I will be able to finish everything that I would not undertake" and so on. Such training certainly helps any person to feel more confident and bold.
Finally, ask your girl to meet at home with friends as often as possible. Bake something tasty and let them eat. After all, the more friends, the more self-confident. By the way, if your girl's age allows her to meet with the boys, but she does not do it because of her indecisiveness, introduce her to some son of her girlfriend (if that's the case, of course). Not the fact that something will turn out, but a new friend to your daughter will not hurt.
As a result, I want to add: sooner or later your girl will leave the walls of her home and go out into the vast world. Therefore, whether she will be a resolute and brave person, largely depends on the parents. Know, the more confident your daughter will be able to help only become your patience and faith in her. Of course, everything can happen not at once, but gradually you will notice colossal results and above all it will be your personal merit. Good luck to you!