When we wake up, we realize that we have overslept, and from this moment we begin to hurry. We quickly dress, while drinking coffee, and run out of the house, and quickly move to work. I have a lot of work to do at work, so we are in a hurry to do everything, during lunch we hurry up to get fuller to continue our work, and when we start work, we hurry up to get home, and after finishing the working day, we hurry home. Arriving home, we are in a hurry to do everything in the house, so that tomorrow morning safely start to rush to work. And so indefinitely, we hurry up from birth.
We hurry to grow up, at the age of six we ineptly paint our lips with Mom's lipstick and put on her high heels. At the age of fifteen we begin to learn sex, and by the age of twenty we already have a child in our hands. Many families are formed on a flight, and then they are formed only if the groom is brought up and is not afraid of obligations. And later, realizing its incompatibility with the partner, one of us runs away, leaving everything, including the child, and incomplete families are formed. The whole problem is that we are in a hurry to grow up. "The incomplete family and its main problems" is what will be discussed in this article.
Today in our country the problem of an incomplete family is very actual. In every second family, a child is born or brought up by one parent. Many of such a family, including me, and I wondered if my future is waiting for my children too? Yet I do not see my husband and the father of my children next to me. It seems that this social problem enters into the norm of our life and turns into a standard. And since this problem is part of the norm of life, does it mean that this is a problem, perhaps it ceases to be a problem for our society, because different deviations from the norm in different levels of our social life are constant, after which these deviations establish new norms.
Around me many friends and friends who raise children alone, they are convinced that they do not need a husband, and their child does not need a father. They argue that the husband is a useless creature that shakes the nerves by lying on the couch and watching TV at a time when she is feeding the child with one hand and the other is cooking something for lunch near the stove. Perhaps, it is worthwhile to start a family a little at an older age, and not in 18-20 years. Perhaps after becoming a little older, we would become a little more responsible not to abandon our own child, and prevent torment in adulthood, when conscience would begin to torment the abandoned child and woman.
My friend was friends with one guy, they walked, talked, but did not kiss or hug. They were just friends. She was very happy with this friendship, because there is no friendship between a man and a woman as such, everyone argues, who is not too lazy to say so. Friendship is a kind of love, they talked in ace, and smacking, and called up, in general, each other could not exist. At that time we both believed in friendship between a man and a woman, and desperately tried to prove it to ourselves with those guys who we liked not as a friend, but as girls. We were stupid and stubborn, while we were told that there was no such friendship, we tried to find it, but as you know, any friendship comes to an end, and in our time the end of friendship comes faster and faster. Maybe we have forgotten how to be friends? And do not see anything further than your nose? So, their friendship came to an end on September 7.
This day is my friend's birthday. She turned 20 years old. Jubilee, which means that guests, friends, relatives, gifts, balls, flowers, laughter and jokes. Congratulations and wishes flowed in the river, in general, a festive mood and it was necessarily HE. And how it happened that they slept. Sex always happens as something so unexpected. You think that you will never do this with a certain person, but it was there, and it was after these thoughts that what was happening was happening. Apparently in a fit of passion and love, mixed with a lot of alcohol and hookah, the two forgot about the existence of contraception. As is typical of our male half, after the night of love he was lost. He stopped calling and writing, and began to ignore it. That night their friendship died. Sex always kills a friendship, because they can not exist together in a relationship of two people. After a couple of weeks, we found out that she was pregnant. The time was not long, and something could be done, but she refused, decided to give birth. She gave birth to a beautiful, healthy, beautiful daughter, who, like two drops, looks like her mother.
We are very communicative, especially when it does not concern us. Through gossip and talk, dad found out that his girlfriend was pregnant. He decided to talk to her, I still do not understand what he wanted to achieve by this conversation, and the most interesting, he turned everything so that she was guilty, and as a result left the offended, saying that she would not be closer to him approached. It feels like she insulted him by the fact that his semen fertilized her egg. She did not demand anything from him, even to himself and said so, but in the beginning he told her that he was not going to recognize paternity.
What motivates people to give up responsibility? And can we abandon it? I asked these questions. The main example is abandoned pregnant women, and newborn children. Being engaged in sex not being protected, really our men operate or work on "perhaps prokanaet"? Yes, I agree with the fact that both men and women are to blame for this, but be kind, do not give up what you've done. My girlfriend did not abandon the child, she decided to give birth, but he refused to recognize the child. She did not demand anything from him, she did not even tell him that she was pregnant. He himself learned from people that she was pregnant. And as a result, he also made her guilty, abandoning the child. Here, the matter is not at all offended because she concealed a pregnancy from him. Here the whole point is that he is trying to hide behind the offense, to justify his irresponsibility, they say, I refuse the child, because you are so-and-so. Even if so, the child is not to blame. The baby was not born yet, he just started to form inside his mother, and already became guilty in the formation of an incomplete family. People are ready to blame everything and everyone, if only they themselves are not guilty. It's like the game "Mafia". The essence of the game is that you blame everyone, you take away from your suspicions, they say, I'm as pure as a "baby's ass," even if you are a "mafia" yourself.
After all, this is a standard situation, and the end of this story is already clear. In a couple of years he realizes and will sleep under their door, guard or daughter, just to see what she became a beauty, or former love, to talk to her, and explain what an idiot he was. Only the question arises, why do they need it? After all, they are doing so well. After all, it's difficult at first, and then we get used to it, and later we do not want to change what we used to get used to. In each of us there is a drop of conservatism. In a couple of years they will not want to break the harmony that was formed between the mother and her daughter.
So what are the blame for children who were not yet born? Why they are immediately deprived of a full-fledged childhood, or in our time, a full-fledged childhood is considered life with one of the parents, and the social pathology is the fact that the family has a mom and dad? Or is it worth creating a family and giving birth to children not in the early stages of growing up, but a little later? And yet, I am convinced that early marriages are far less stable than mature ones. After all, it is already accepted by society that marriage at an early age means that a young couple is waiting for a child, and all because we are in a hurry. Only in adulthood can a person make the right thoughtful step, realizing all responsibility.
My brother got married when he was 28, and his bride 26. Everyone said that they got married late. And where is it hurrying? Now they have a beautiful daughter growing up, and they are happy. And I am sure that their marriage will last till the gray age, because the two formed individuals took a deliberate step, fully aware of their actions. And I want to warn everyone, do not rush! And we will prevent, therefore, all the problems of an incomplete family! Happiness will not run away from you with time, unlike a young husband ... Over time, it will only become more delicious and sweeter, like a wine of years of aging.