The role of play in children's development

There is no definite norm on how much time a child should play on his own, and how much in a team. The game is the main activity of any child. In the same way as for an adult person, work and classes in favorite leisure activities. And how all adults have their preferences in how much time to devote to this or that occupation, do it together with someone or one, and children intuitively choose that game form that is closer to them at the moment. Compare it with others, make it play a certain way, of course, is not worth it. However, this does not mean not paying attention at all to what games the child prefers, how they play. The game is a very serious occupation, and its forms depend not only on the nature of the child, but the game activity itself can directly influence its formation. Through the game, a small person is developing his personality, abilities are manifested, one can even say that what and how the child plays directly affects his further adult life. So children's games should be given special attention. Each game has its own time
"He's so sociable!" He's not even half a year, but always reaches out to other children, likes to play with them. " If parents talk about a very small child, then most likely they are outgoing. A child of about 2.5-3 years is not able to play with their peers. He, of course, can be interested in other children and their toys, but call it a game in the full sense can not, because there is no active communication. The child's games up to 1.5-2 years old can be called spontaneous, that is, he plays into what at this point in time attracted his attention. That's why children at this age create a complete tarar around themselves: having taken one toy and playing with it a little, he immediately switches his attention to another object he liked. At the same age, a child can observe (but also not for long) behind other people's games. From two to three years, children are more attracted to games alone with toys or so-called parallel games, when the kid plays with himself, but next to other children. This is especially evident in the kindergarten group or on the playground. All the guys are building something on their own, each in its "site." Sometimes the kids cross and obviously interfere with each other, but it's not so easy just to take the kid to the other end of the court. One will be uninteresting there. Making everyone play together ("Let's collect all the cars and build one big garage) will not be easy either, in this case, the adult himself must enter the game and run the process." At this age, children do not know how to negotiate, establish rules, establish strong contacts In a parallel game they are just learning all these things.

A new stage in the development of games for children is related games. This stage usually begins after three years. Between the kids there is an exchange of toys, they tell each other about their game, for a short time come into action, organized by another, but the general storyline and certain rules there. Each child plays as he sees fit. And after 4 years, there are skills of collective play. When children can gather in a group and set certain rules for the game, follow its goals and stick to the story. Such group games can be any - sports, cognitive, role-playing, but in any there is interaction and a collective beginning. In order to achieve a joint result, each child must somewhere give way. And this, undoubtedly, is already a significant achievement. All previous games remain. Depending on the situation, the mood of the child can sometimes return to them.
Main values
Parents almost never complain and do not worry if their child seeks to play only with other children and can not spend time remaining alone. Activity, sociability are considered qualities that ensure success in life, because sociable children always cause joy. "No matter where he is, he immediately has friends, he can immediately come up with something," "Such a smart, talkative, even at his six knows when and what to say," say adults. Yes, it is joint games that develop communication skills in a variety of situations, the ability to plan their behavior. Although awareness of interpersonal communication is also possible if the child simply looks at how others play and communicate. But their own skill in this field is impossible without practice. Children who like to play in the company tend to be more open, easier to negotiate, not particularly worried about the failure argument. However, do not underestimate the game alone. They also teach a lot. Their main value is the development of their ability to occupy themselves. If it is not, the person turns out to be addicted to others and not always picky in communication. Children who do not know how to play on their own are often prone to behavioral and destructive behavior. The bored child sits and scratches steel. Or he stands by the window and discreetly tears off the leaves of the flower. Or begins to molest the sleeping cat. Because someone who does not know how to play, always starts to break something. A child who knows how to play without the participation of others, is more independent and creative - to find an exciting lesson one is much more difficult. In general, do not give preference to one kind of games. Both singles and collective are important for development.

And let's all go together!
If it seems to you that the child does not play enough with peers and you want to instill in him the love of the collective, you must first find out whether the real problem is this or our subjective opinion.

Many parents have the image of an ideal child. Alas, it is impossible to make a son or daughter exactly the same as our ideas. Much depends on the innate characteristics of the nervous system, and the child will develop harmoniously only if we take this into account. A child who knows how to play with other children does not feel fear of communication, but still prefers quieter and more secluded games. He hardly needs to be deliberately, for reasons of "need to communicate more", looking for a company. The problem can be considered a situation where the child does not have relationships with peers. For example, can not play without breaking the rules. Or all the time provokes quarrels, fights, or is afraid. It happens that the parents themselves, perhaps even unconsciously, form a negative attitude towards the collective. Fearing bad influence or aggression from children, they take their child away from children's playgrounds, guard it from "these children", And then convince that playing together is good. Encourage the child's play, even if something in the game is not going the way you'd like. Teach him and forgive, and put up, and insist on his own, and concede - but not rigidly, but simply in the form of advice and comments. Limit the circle of communication, if you see that in a large company, a child is hard to play.

... And one is good
And if the task is the reverse - to teach to play alone? We also study behavior first.

It is difficult to instill in a child a love for that which has a negative meaning for him. Children who, as punishment, are deprived of communication or ignored, will never understand the charms of seclusion. It is even harder to learn to play alone if adults perceive isolation as a problem. "Are we going to sit at home all day? You can die with boredom!" Adults should find their own jobs and show the child that one can be very interesting. Sometimes the inability to play alone is a sign of a breach of attention. Children with attention deficit disorder need constant external stimuli, it is difficult for them to concentrate on their thoughts, to keep their plan and purpose of action. It is necessary to accustom them to single games - this will be a good addition to the general treatment. True, parents will need a lot of time and patience. First have to play together or just be around. Watch how the child plays, ask questions during the course of the action, distract if you see that he is tired. Do not try to keep him playing as long as possible. On the contrary, interrupt when not yet fed up. So will be the interest, the desire to return to the game again.