Now the word "complex" is used by many, but not everyone knows what it means. The first about the complexes spoke Karl Jung, and it was he who introduced the word into use. According to Young, the complex is "a generalization of emotions and thoughts that have been moved back to the unconscious". In other words, the complex is a symbiosis of the feelings and states of a person, his motives, associations, all of which have a definite effect on a person's psychological behavior and the structure of his personality.
The complex can be compared to an open wound: it is worth disturbing it, and a person begins to feel uncomfortable and uneasy, may be unsettled, show aggression or, conversely, withdraw into himself. Such a reaction, caused by internal complexes, acts as an invisible wall that blocks the path to freedom, does not allow a person to become strong and independent. But nevertheless, complexes have opposite properties: on the one hand, because of them a person becomes vulnerable and defenseless before the big world, but on the other hand, complexes can serve as a stimulus to self-improvement.
Formation of complexes
Why do we try so hard to get rid of the complexes? The fact is that with a man overgrown with various complexes, it becomes difficult to communicate: he can inadequately react to some words and actions of other people. More often than not, complexed people have increased suspiciousness, envy, discontent, arrogance, insidiousness ... That's why some people are disliked.
Usually the complexes that we carry with us through life, are formed at an early age. For example, in order to accustom her daughter to order, her mother often repeated to her: "You're so sloppy, look at what kind of bards are going on in your room, to look disgusting!" Or to the son, again, for educational purposes they said: "Why are you so stupid, again got a deuce in mathematics! Take an example from Vasya's best worker! " Such morals are perceived by children very painfully, and in due course there are complexes of inferiority, which are only exacerbated by additional components - poor school performance, inability to find a common language with peers, to develop hidden talents and abilities. In later life such a person already without noticing tries to find and "pull the ears" of justification to their defeats, seeking confirmation that he is a loser and can not do anything. Such a state prevents a person on the way to a successful life realization.
The main misfortune is that the main problem, because of which the complex developed, is gradually forgotten and forced out of consciousness by other events. Therefore, a person can not connect his failures with the primary source of his problems and a complex state. And if you do not know what to fight, then you are almost doomed to defeat.
Inferiority complex
Those people who have an inferiority complex are sure that they are in some way worse than others and pre-set themselves to failure. They think that if they are so "bad", then there is nothing to love, appreciate and respect. Seeking inner tranquility and getting rid of their oppressive feelings, people with an inferiority complex try to improve themselves somehow, doing something good for others, thereby trying to appear in a more favorable light to the people and to show that they are better, than there is in reality. But it happens that in order to impress others, such a person resorts to deceit. By all means, a notorious person tries to show his success and self-sufficiency in all spheres of life. He can try to buy only expensive branded things, cars, phones, even if he spends his last money on them or climbs into loans; can not get out of the gym only in order to demonstrate to the surrounding people their hardened biceps and see admiring looks; can boast left and right of the number of his love affair or the fact that he is personally acquainted with the president ... However, most often the image of a self-sufficient person is just a bluff. And if this illusion dissipates, the inferiority complex will blossom in a lush color and the person will have problems with interaction with others, work, with close people.
In adolescence, the inferiority complex arises most often due to any problems with appearance, because of too strong parental control, or, conversely, with insufficient attention to the child from relatives and parents in the first place. Negative impact also has excessive criticism of a teenager, humiliation on the part of teachers and peers, psychological trauma (for example, parents' divorce, death of loved ones) received in childhood. All these moments can be the cause of dissatisfaction with yourself, that your own shortcomings can be greatly exaggerated. This leads to the fact that the child begins to fixate on his failures, the complexion grows into him deeper and in adulthood we get a person suffering from an inferiority complex.
The German psychoanalyst Alfred Adler, who first used the phrase "inferiority complex," liked to say: "To be considered a full-fledged person, one must have an inferiority complex." And indeed it is. However, the manifestations of this complex do not allow a person to live in peace with himself and find harmony. How do you know if you have an inferiority complex? The first bell can become too critical attitude to its appearance. If you are not satisfied with the shape of your head, the thickness of the lips, the size of the bust, height, length of the nose, etc., then you still have an inferiority complex. Also, his dissatisfaction with his financial position, social status, professional achievements speaks of his presence.
But most of the ladies are still primarily concerned about their appearance. Modern standards of beauty, which we see on pages of glossy magazines, advertising posters, TV screens, force more women to think that they are imperfect. Although to develop an inferiority complex in the beautiful half of humanity can and their male halves, if overdo with critical remarks about women. The result of such quibbles may be, for example, an obsession to pump your lips or make a chest a couple of sizes larger.
Complex loser
If a person has such a complex, then he believes that his life was worse than it could have been. To distract from these thoughts and suppress them, he can cling to some ideas and conclusions that help him feel more meaningful. "Let me not be able to make a career and make friends, but I belong to a great nation that defeated fascism." Logic, it should be noted, is not trivial enough, and arguments to justify its inertness are not strong, but the complex does not need to be disposed of, and its psychological immaturity can continue to groom and cherish.
Complex of infantilism
Owners of this complex do not want to think about the problems of adulthood. They do not like to make decisions and take responsibility for themselves. They are not at all independent, which often leads to difficulties in dealing with the opposite sex and other people. For example, it often happens that overeating and even alcoholism is a consequence of this complex. After all, to control yourself in the diet or stop in time to drink alcohol, you need to be a mature self-sufficient person, and not behave like a small child who, at any opportunity, indulges his whims and immediate desires.
Special cases
Doctors sometimes diagnose from their clients complexes of over-fulfillment (overcompleteness), when one person combines high self-conceit and stupidity. "It's so rare to find a man smarter than himself!" - sometimes says the type, himself very rare stupidity and ignorance. Such people often believe that they know best what is good for them, and they are absolutely sure that the advice of specialists is not suitable for them, because nothing to perfect, strictly speaking, is not necessary. Often there is also a complex of the poor, it forces a man, no matter how rich and wealthy he may be, to strive for material goods, accumulate them beyond measure and at the same time be very greedy and stingy.
Absence of complexes
The case when the complex is his absence. After all, then a person has no desire and need to improve and develop. Why change something in yourself, strive for an ideal, if everything is fine with you? So, if you are absolutely happy with yourself, think: are you all right? Perhaps it is worth looking at yourself critically.