In your family, there was a momentous event .. You were expecting this day in joyful anticipation and at the same time of mild anxiety, you bought all these cute little things - a knapsack, notebooks, pencils, pencils. A young student is dressed with a needle, like a real gentleman or a little lady. So, your child went to first grade ...
To begin with, many mistakenly reduce the process of preparing a child for "training" in various preparatory institutions. For example, they master the program for the first class, study foreign languages, and learn computer skills. The effect of such forced training according to the research of specialists is only one - this is an increase in the amount of information.
As a result of this "preparation", children, when they come to school, do not understand the essence of the requests addressed to them, regularly diverted, the teacher listens inattention, etc. However, they need to "sit out" the whole lesson, concentrate and be attentive to learning the teaching material and much more. This behavior is explained by the fact that well-read, believing children do not have an interest in learning, begin to violate discipline and, consequently, conflicts with the teacher. Parents are puzzled - they have given so much strength to prepare their child. And the whole point is, as many psychologists believe, that a successful psychological preparation of a baby for school does not depend on whether he reads whether the child thinks.
To solve this problem, it is necessary, first, to develop interest in the child in cognition, to develop analytical, creative, and other abilities, as well as memory, attention, perception, thinking, speech, etc. Secondly, you should not scold a child when something is not working for him, but it is necessary to understand the cause of failure, discuss it together and help correct the mistake. By these actions, we express confidence in him, thereby programming him for success.
In the end, it must be said that the emotional situation in the family is of great importance for the preparation of the baby for school. Love, understanding, parental example, trust, education of kindness, independence, commitment and responsibility are the key to successful and quick adaptation of the baby to the upcoming school days.First, you need to remember that you, and of course, your child is in a state of stress. And it's not bad, not good - it's a fact. This is a natural state associated with a cardinal change in the life of the family, in the mode of the day, the way of life, the usual affairs and family rituals. It is important to get out of this stressful state without losses, on the contrary, laying the foundation for the future successful schooling of your child.
What can you do to achieve this?
First, try to treat everything with light humor, be optimistic, look for good and even funny sides in any situation. After many years, together with the child, you will remember with a smile his first crooked attempts at writing, the first successes and disappointments, the first "real school friends", the first teacher.
So we came to the most important - the first teacher. From these days the first teacher should become the main person in the life of the child. The untiring authority of the first teacher is the guarantee of the future success of your child not only in school, but in life. This after, as a teenager, he will begin to take a critical attitude towards what is happening and to the people who surround him. And today only boundless faith in the teacher, in his correctness and justice, will help the first-grader successfully master the school knowledge. In relations with the first teacher, the child has the ability to communicate with authoritative people in future, with people in whose subordination he will be. Do not minimize the meaning of this. Each of us, even the most freedom-loving and independent, periodically has to be in a situation of subordination, and our experience of communicating with "power holders" can significantly help or hinder us. And the prototype of these relations is just laid in the first class. In addition, a child at this age can not yet determine what knowledge he needs, what is not, how best to perform this or that task, he has not yet developed an individual student style, there are no particularly preferred subjects. All this in the future. Today, the child is easiest to survive this difficult period, if he will trust the teacher, follow his advice and recommendations. In your power to help the baby. Even if you have doubts about the correctness of the teacher's requirements, in his pedagogical literacy - do not express these doubts in the child and, especially, do not condemn the teacher in talking with the child. Do not knock the ground out from under your feet. In a conversation with a child, emphasize that you respect the teacher's opinion ("Of course, since Anna Alexandrovna said so, so it must be done"), pay attention to those qualities of the teacher that impress you ("Yes, Inna Nikolayevna is strict, but she wants, so you are very well engaged, and she has such kind eyes) and so on. And try to resolve your fears in a personal meeting with the teacher, at the very least, call for help from the administration. If after two months you still doubt the teacher, think about changing the class or school.
The period of two months is not accidentally mentioned. It takes about as long as your family needs to survive stress. At this time, the child may experience the following changes in health and mood:
- headaches and abdominal pain;
-Disturbance of digestion (diarrhea or constipation);
- decreased or increased appetite, increased cravings for sweets;
- the need for daytime sleep and fatigue in the evenings;
- increased irritability, tearfulness or aggression;
These and similar manifestations are a normal reaction to the stress of the first school days. Treat them with patience, repeat the child more often, that you love him, that he is wonderful and that everything will turn out for him. Now, more than ever, the baby needs your support and unconditional love. Remember, overestimated self-esteem at this age is normal and necessary. It is self-reliance in their abilities, in their abilities that allow a child to take on new business for him without fear and easily master new skills. Often, note the success of the student ("This little hook turned out perfectly!", "Wow, you can already count such large numbers!", "What an interesting retelling you got, I really liked it!") And do not fix attention to failures - the one who does nothing. Gradually, violations in behavior and health, if they arise, will come to naught. If after two or three months you are still observing the child's alarming behavior - contact a psychologist or a doctor.
In the same period, the child begins to actively build relationships with classmates who are also very important. Encourage friendship, teach the baby to solve the arising problems of relationships. Some children have a desire to stand out due to finding something bad in the classmate. The child can confidently and proudly tell you that "Pasha today all the lessons turned and the teacher made comments to him" or that "Masha keeps forgetting everything all the time and then roars in the lesson." Do not rush to encourage your son or daughter with the words: "But you do not do it, you are clever!". Do not put arrogance and sense of exclusivity, you know how difficult it is to communicate with adults who fully appropriated these qualities. It's better to turn the conversation into a neutral channel, and ask the child if it's good to spin, cry, forget everything ... Discuss with him the situation, find a way how he can avoid such mistakes and how he can help his new friends.
And, of course, the first experience of learning activities and doing homework is very important. In theory, instruction in the first two classes is unremarkable, and in the first months, homework to children is not asked, but in practice they are asked and noted: teachers put different substitutes for estimates - suns and clouds, asterisks, flags, etc. There is nothing wrong with this in your right attitude. Instead of the question: "Well, what did you get today?", Ask what your young pupil has learned, what interesting happened during the school day, what he can be proud of or what upset him. Teach a child to evaluate the process of learning and apprenticeship, not just its results.
And more - give the baby as much independence as he is ready to digest. Try not to do for him what he is ready to do himself. And, no matter how much you want to control every step, every move and every thought of it, you must stop and gradually let go of your child to free swimming.
Remember, your child has grown - he is now a PUPIL.