And would any parent want his image in a child to be associated with the humiliation of his personality?
Why is there still so much violence in children in modern society? And how to deal with this? Often corporal punishment is used, because there is simply not enough patience to find out the cause of bad behavior in a good way. Most often, especially in unconscious age, children behave defiantly, trying to attract attention to themselves. So, you need to think about the fact that the child does not receive enough parental love. It is worth studying the psychology of the child, at least its foundations, in order to understand that punishment is not the best method of education.
I would also like to note an ultimatum attitude as a method of raising children. This attitude "you to me - I to you" deprives the child of sincerity, but teaches only to receive the desired often by any available means. Encouragement, of course, stimulates activity in the child, but it should be the logical conclusion of a well-done work, success in school.
Corporal punishment as a method of raising children can be countered by the method of cooperation and cooperation between the child and the parent. If a child commits a misconduct, how can he explain that it is impossible to do this? First, do not get excited, calm down and try to figure out the reason. If the child does not understand the essence of the deed, try to simulate a situation in which to demonstrate different scenarios and try to find out which of the options the child would choose by seeing it from the side. This will be the best lesson for him.
When a child has done something and at the same time sincerely regrets about it, do not put pressure on him with an additional burden of guilt. If he realized that he was not right and is ready to answer for his deed, then the lesson is learned. The younger the child, the more love and attention he needs. After all at this age, parents are the most important people and their authority for the child is indisputable. And it depends on them how their children will bring up their children. Polls prove that in most cases parents spend their money in the family with children exactly the way it was in their childhood, in relation to them by their parents.
As we found out, corporal punishment as a method of raising children is not the most productive of methods. But no less destructive is the psychological punishment, when, to let something the child know, the parent starts ignoring it. Such coldness painfully hurts a child, and due to his inexperience, he sometimes simply can not recognize the reason for such treatment. Therefore, a constructive dialogue is necessary, because a child is not an appendage of his parents, but a full-fledged personality with rights. And do not forget that the child's bad behavior can be triggered by the behavior of adults, and the child as a sponge absorbs and takes an example from them. And, solving their problems in adulthood, it is probably violence that will be chosen as the best way to solve problems, and this is fraught.
And, as you know, it is better to encourage activities than to fight, because the fight always provokes opposition. And with whom to fight, with their own children? And do you need it? I think no. Only trust and support will help establish a friendly relationship with your child. If you still think that in this situation the punishment is necessary, explain everything as is. Say that you are very upset by his behavior, explain that it is not worth doing so. Warn that you will be forced to apply punishment, but only do it gently, and do not threaten. In some situations, such tactics can effectively affect the child. Especially in this way, you make it clear that you think the child is reasonable enough to make a choice himself. This allows an independent assessment of the situation.
And think about how you want to see your children in the future - intimidated, complexed individuals or people who are able to separate the bad from the good and solve their problems on their own? Try to instill in children respect, understanding and a sense of justice. Do it visually, for example. This is most effective.
And regardless of how you prefer to educate your children, think about what they lead. In order for children to love you not necessarily to be "ideal", just love them, and they will answer you the same. Treat them with care and attention, because love is a natural need of everyone.