How can I make my husband start cooking? Most likely, it is you who cook for the whole family. Even if you like to cook, you still need to divide the duties in half. Men are good at cooking, you just need to introduce them. How? Begin with a request to make you an ordinary sandwich. When you eat, praise your husband's talent and say that you have never eaten a more delicious sandwich in your life! In a few days, ask him to cook scrambled eggs in the morning - he will surely cope with it. Praise this scrambled egg the next week - see, it will become its crown dish. Acting in this way, gradually you will come to the point that your lover will discover a culinary talent. This way of increasing self-esteem is based on the fact that people are praised every day. Nothing motivates us to action in the least, like confidence that we are doing great and that no one will do it better than us. How to make him do the cleaning? Surely your man at the beginning of life together broke some vase, wiping the dust, so that you are convinced that it should not be allowed to be cleaned. In addition, you yourself do it faster and better. To change such an unfair state of things, patience is needed. Do not whimper and do not complain that in other families everything is different. Do simply - stop cleaning in the apartment. Surely you have accustomed him to order in the house, and now he will be unpleasantly surprised by the mess. Then tell him that you probably started allergic to dust, because when you get out, you immediately get sick. Ask him to clean the apartment for you. Close your eyes to the broken vase, but praise the thoroughness with which your husband did everything.
Train not only at home
If you are afraid that you will not be able to implement all the little tricks and tricks at once, practice with friends. In this you will be helped by well-known books on manipulation techniques: Robert Chapdini's "Psychology of Influence" and "How to Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. This behavior is the principle of a weak woman. Men like to be useful and usually do what we ask them to do. Only here we have this problem - we do not know how to ask, we prefer to do everything ourselves. And this is a serious mistake. After asking your man for even a trifle, you let him know that you need him. Men like this feeling very much. The art is to ask softly, in a low voice and letting you know how weak you are. Believe, it works! How to make him get up from the couch on the weekend and spend them with you the way you want? On a warm sunny day off, you would be happy to go for a walk. He also plans to lie on the couch all Saturday. How to lure him out of the house? Here's the way: offer him as an alternative to a walk something that surely does not cause him enthusiasm. For example, say that they invited Mama to visit her on Saturday or that it would be necessary to dismantle the mezzanine. In the face of such a perspective, any other proposal will seem attractive. Give him time to "get scared", and then in passing, say that, of course, it would be best to leave the house in the sun, than to sour in four walls. He will surely swallow the hook and himself rush to pump the wheels at the bikes. This is a much more effective method than a scandal with the standard set of claims "we never", "you always". Why do you need a fight? The less tension in the relationship, the better. How to make it, finally, to fix the tap? If your husband does not have golden hands, and the thought that everything around the house can be done without masters seems to him a heresy, you have only one thing - to trick him. We need to come up with a way for the husband to pick up a hammer and hammer a nail, which you have been asking him for a month. Do not spoil your mood with another scandal. Better use the principle of competition, which is also called the principle of cockfighting. No man can endure that at his side there is someone better than him, who knows more and knows how.
How does this work in practice? Tell your husband that you just met a neighbor who promised to come in tonight and drive a nail. Or in a company of friends ask about this from someone you know. In both cases, by the evening the problem will be solved: the husband will do everything himself. This principle always works. But it can not be used when comparing a husband to others. The point is not to reproach him, but to create a situation of healthy competition. And one more thing: praise your husband for any, even the most insignificant action. And it does not matter that he hit a nail crookedly. How to make him keep his word? You agreed that your husband will call in the afternoon and tell you what time he will return home. You want to know, because you cook dinner. But he does not call and does not return. You put dinner in the fridge and, getting angry, go to sleep. The next day you make him a scandal, and he is protected by all the truths and fouls, says that he sacrifices himself for the family, working until late at night. Why did not you call? I forgot, there was no network, the chief was sitting next to me, there can be many excuses. But they mean one thing: he did not appreciate your efforts. How to deal with this? Use the principle of equality, that is, "like you to me, so do I to you." In the next few weeks, do not cook dinner at all. And after a couple of days, arrange to meet with him after work and be late for about an hour. Of course, he will reproach you. So what? Use his arguments!
You do not know how or do not want to do this, because it seems unworthy to you? In this case, be prepared for his eternal lag. He will treat you like a man who always waits and tolerates everything. But you do not want to feel like a victim. The principle of equality will give him the opportunity to feel like you are at a time when he does not keep a promise. He will not do it any more, but you will insist on it. How to make him call more often when he leaves home for a long time? Your husband is on a business trip. He promised that he would call, and you are all waiting for a phone call, but in vain. He does not ring for days, and his mobile is off. You're worried if something happened. Her husband calls the next day, surprised that you are worried. This situation makes you angry. The next time he leaves, do not wait for his call and do not answer the phone when he calls. Come only for the fourth time, wondering why he was worried. Tell me that you had a lot of things to do and you completely forgot about it. It will be enough for him to call more often. Why? First of all, the principle of control over the environment operates here. While the man is sure that you are waiting for his call, he will be dragging out time. If he loses such confidence, he will call right away, as soon as he realizes that you have stopped waiting. Instead of worrying, use the time to take care of yourself. Let it be his head, how you are entertained. How to make it start to lose weight and watch yourself? Men are rarely, critical to themselves - unlike us, they do not interfere with the tummy. And the argument that it is harmful to health, that obesity can cause diabetes, hypertension, and impotence, the husband does not take seriously. What to do, if for dinner he eats four cutlets, and then lies down on the sofa? Tell him about your colleague from work that has lost weight and now looks very attractive. Use also the principle of ingression, that is, increase your value in his eyes. How? The next day, get dressed more elegantly than usual, and in the evening, talk about some funny incident involving you and your colleague. Let him know that you like other men! Realizing this, he will quickly lose weight.
If you want it to be, in your opinion. You planned to go on vacation with friends, but her husband has a thousand arguments to refuse. How to convince him? Use the principle of conformism - during a conversation behave like him. Just sit, just hold your hands, do similar gestures. In this situation, the interlocutor begins to believe that before him is someone who thinks like him. It's better that you sit next to the sofa - then the distance between you will be less than if you sit opposite each other at the table. During a conversation, put a hand on his shoulder, touch his hands and look into his eyes. Use the expressions: "I understand you perfectly," "I completely agree with you," "I think the same as you", then carefully add "but ..." and submit your arguments. Such a conversation will end with your victory!