There are men who emotionally destroy their loved ones, turning them into depressed, notorious women. They are called in different ways: "aggressively passive psychopaths", "misogynists", "misogynists" or just "wrong men", who are best avoided by the side. But how to calculate these types at the stage of dating? And how do you know which man in front of you is a sweet romantic or a real tyrant? Every woman needs to know this.
They can be socially successful, attractive outwardly, and often a woman, marrying such a person, thinks she has received a prize from life. And only after a while, there are alarming features. These are sudden outbursts of anger, followed by a long silence. This is a constant criticism of your actions - and often in public ("Do not pay attention to it, it always something will not blurt out"). It is a tireless control over everything that you do, ridiculing your opinion, your thoughts, your ideas. Such a man achieves one thing: complete suppression of the woman and the primacy over her. Since misogynists - people are usually smart, it happens unnoticed. And one day a woman finds herself completely crushed: she has a lot of psychosomatic diseases, dependence on alcohol or tablets, she can not work, she can not step without advice from her husband.
The Last Romantic
Ironically, such a man in the beginning of relationships is very romantic. Everything happens extremely rapidly: one fiery glance, a quick declaration of love and almost the first night the offer of the hand and heart. It seems that this is a real man of your dreams: he cancels his business meetings for you, promises to solve all your problems on time, hurries to introduce you to his parents and friends. Raised in ladies' novels and films, many of us are just that and that is happiness.
These men behave this way, not only because they know what we are "buying" for. Such an impetuous onslaught is necessary for them so that your relations do not pass through a normal stage of development, in the course of which their unseemly character traits may unfold.
WHAT TO DO?
If a man tries to curtail the period of courtship, ask him to slow down the development of events: "Where should we hurry? After all, we are already together and we are well ยป. A normal person will sympathize with this, the destroyer, most likely, will disappear.
"You and I are one"
Of course, a man of this type chooses a certain woman. Not the one who, seeing his romantic outbursts, chuckles to himself: "Of course, now I'll leave everything and marry someone for whom." He is looking for someone who dreams of merging in ecstasy with his beloved. At first, the realization of one's own "I" in both of them recedes into the background. The whole charge of energy is spent on loving, being loved, seeking approval and psychologically dissolving into each other. Yes, such a period is passed by all couples, but this type will not tolerate that you are distracted by girlfriends, parents, even at work you should only think about it.
WHAT TO DO?
Whatever man in front of you was, no matter how strong your love, try not to dissolve completely in your man. Keep up other relationships - with friends, family. Look at how your man will react if you are passionate about talking about your work or hobby. If he gets in a bad mood or if he says that you are engaged in nonsense, be wary. Perhaps in his view "not nonsense" is only love for him and complete submission.
Rescue the drowning
These aggressively passive psychopaths play on our desire to be necessary to someone, to help, to take care. "When I met Nicholas, he honestly told me that he lost his job and made a lot of debts. I was flattered by this frankness. And I even felt joy that I could help him. Nicholas was simply shocked by my responsiveness. And for me his sincere gratitude became the best reward, "Lidia says. At first it seems that it is quite easy to help this person, but then it turns out that one work is far from home, another does not correspond to his requests, the third one is a bad boss. And the fact that he can not find a place in life, to abandon his addictions (addiction to alcohol, gambling), only you will be to blame.
WHAT TO DO?
Try to help him once and see how he reacts. If he vigorously grasps the opportunity and will himself take active steps for his "salvation," everything is in order. If excuses begin or after some time a person again finds himself in a situation in which he needs to help, it means that this is his life style.
And one more interesting detail: when you provide help to an adequate person, you experience, as a rule, confidence and calmness. If you are a misogynist, you feel panic and readiness for reckless actions. This is the main difference.
Victim of a hysterical woman
Another trait of the misogynist - he was not lucky with women. They had been self-serving, extra-demanding, and, most importantly, hysterics, which caused scandals on any occasion. This should also alert you.
So, now he is looking for a woman with a low self-esteem, emotionally dependent, weak, and in you he sees just such. In fact, it is not at all a fact that the previous wives of this man were overly emotional from birth. Simply, having learned what kind of a man is before you, any woman willy-nilly becomes a hysterical woman.
WHAT TO DO?
Ask him to talk about his life, about why he broke up with his wives, girlfriends. If he actively refuses, take an alarm: he probably wants to hide something from you. All the women "did not understand" him, were "bastards", "hysterics"? Especially run from him, so as not to be in their row (and if you stay - you will be there necessarily). You are worthy of the love and respect of a normal person, and not someone who will work for you on your complexes. Is not it?