Nevertheless, we will try to trace some regularities in this matter.
Where does the relationship begin?
They say that life is richer than fiction. And in fact, between a man and a woman dating are most often committed in the most prosaic places: at work, at school, near the house (in the neighborhood) acquainted up to 80% of couples. A little more on vacation, nightclubs and the Internet, but mostly we find love in the circle of closest friends, colleagues or friends.
When the relationship begins
There are no general patterns. Some find love at first sight, others are familiar before the relationship begins for years. But there is an optimal period before the wedding, after which the strongest families are created - it's 3-6 months. This period is the most sensitive to knowing exactly whether the person is next to you. In second place on the reliability of marriage between people familiar from six months to a year, on the third - from one to three months. If people knew each other for a long time: two, three or even five years, but did not start a love relationship, as a rule, they create the most problematic and unstable families. In order for the relationship between a man and a woman to be strong and lasting, the most important decisions must be taken at a time when they are familiar from three to six months. This means that knowing how a relationship between a man and a woman can begin, and what they can lead to, it is critically important for us to understand how love arises at first sight. Because couples who are created from old acquaintances are, as a rule, couples desperate in search of two unfortunate and lonely people.
How love arises at first sight
Strange as it may sound, scientists have long found the ideal formula for love at first sight. In short, it is as follows: in the subconscious we have a list of the qualities of a potential second half that arose in childhood. It may not coincide with what we think ourselves, and what we talk about with others. As soon as we meet a person who corresponds to most of this list, there is a "short circuit" - love at first sight. Our subconscious or intuition tells us abruptly that this is the one who needs it.
If the lists of qualities of a man and a woman coincide, the relationship begins rather quickly, and develops into a fairly happy and strong family. If the list coincides with only one, there is unrequited love, which many consider a great misfortune.
Scientists and then podsuetilis: they say that love at first sight can be more than once in your life, and that most often the lists still coincide, than do not coincide. Firstly, to each such list of qualities there corresponds a certain type of personality, and people with this type of personality in the world have more than one. Secondly, the principle of mutual complement often operates, for example, imperious ladies like spineless men, and soft men - women with a character. That is, for each type of person's personality there is an ideal complementing his type of partner's character.
All this is good at the level of theory, but how can this be applied in practice, you ask? There is something difficult to advise here. There is such a personality trait as "level of reflexivity". It is rarely high, and surprisingly, the highest level of reflexivity in rather closed and unsociable people. Most people do not have a high capacity for reflection, that is, adequate self-knowledge. And they need a look from the outside. Not for nothing that for many centuries there was an institution of marriage, concluded with the help of a matchmaker, or organized by parents. Not only social and social reasons were at the heart of this, but also that view from the outside.
If you want to find your soul mate, you can help and friends, and friends, and counseling psychologist, which will give you the opportunity to realize what you really want. And after you find out, you need to learn to relaxed perception. This character trait is so complicated that it is worth it to practice at specialized trainings. As a result of teaching the relaxed perception, you can not feel the jaundice at the sight of the ideal man, communicate with him more or less calmly and without hysterics or numbness, which are typical for situations when we are covered by feeling. In addition, this quality will allow you not to attack such a man with the frenzy of a person hungry for normal relationships. Simply, you will be able to find a balance between a conscious and unconscious desire, between rational and intuitive requirements for a future partner. And then fate itself will give you the options for meetings that you have been waiting for so long. After all, it turns out that your ideal man - he is somewhere very, very close!