Good relationships with the mother-in-law can and should be. Try to find the common language with your loved one in spite of everything, in communication with her, try to compromise. You need to realize and make it clear to his mother that you are not rivals who are fighting for the love of one man.
It is very important to live separately from the parents after the wedding. If you live with your husband's parents, then conflicts are inevitable. No wonder they say that there can not be two mistresses in the house. Sooner or later, conflicts will begin to arise about how to properly wash the floors and how tasty to cook the cutlets that your husband and the son of your mother-in-law are fond of. A separate life is already a significant reason not to spoil relations.
Under no circumstances, under any circumstances, criticize and complain about your husband to his mom - it's at least not advisable to do this, but for the most dangerous for the relationship. Do not make him any comments in her presence. Your husband is the best and most important achievement of your mother-in-law, the fruit of her upbringing. Criticizing him, you unconsciously criticize her twice.
Never compare your mother's mom to your mom. They are different people, brought up in different families, with established habits and lifestyle. Your mother-in-law is worth loving and respecting at least for the fact that she gave birth, brought up and raised your beloved, single and unique husband. It is to her that you should be grateful for all the positive qualities of your man.
Listen to the advice of your mother-in-law, even if she tries to tell you how to cook borscht correctly, that is, those things that you yourself know very well. First, she really knows your husband and her son better, and some tips can be very useful to you. So that a man does not compare you to his mother and does not say: "And my mother is preparing this way ...", listen to her advice. Secondly, at least just be a pleasant interlocutor and know how to listen to her husband's mother. Let even these tips you forget in five minutes.
Never involve your husband in your disagreements with your mother-in-law. Who knows, maybe he will be on Mom's side. Do not make him torn between the most beloved and important in his life women.
Your husband's mother is a very important person in your life. She is your new family and native person. Try to achieve its location. Learn about her hobbies, show her interest in them.
Accept with gratitude the gifts of his mother. And let it be another apron or potholder for the hot one. The main thing is not a gift, but attention. Do yourself more often gifts to his mother. Let them not be expensive, maybe even made by themselves. This will show your warmth and concern for your mother-in-law.
Communicate more often with your mother-in-law. Communication allows to establish good relations. Address your mother-in-law not only when you need something from her, but simply to find out how her state of health and mood is. Sincere interest and respect will allow you not to spoil relations with his mother.
Do not limit the communication between mother-in-law and your children. Invite his mom often to visit, leave the children on the day off at a visit to the grandmother.
In order not to spoil relations with his mother, we need the efforts of three people: you, your husband and his mother. Be tolerant and wise, consider the interests of all three sides: your own, your husband and your mother-in-law. And then you do not have to wonder how not to spoil the relationship with his mother.