Probably, you need to start to understand why you have such thoughts and a split of feelings? Often, it happens when a loved man does not know who he really is.
Do you have the feeling that next to you there is not one person but two twin brothers, where, one of them is an angel, and the other is a real devil? Then the cause of your experiences is completely understandable. The fact is that such men like to wear masks, trying to seem worse than they really are. But still, when such men with someone get too close, when they still open up and show feelings, the mask at least temporarily falls down and opens a completely different person who can be loving and understanding. But, unfortunately, this behavior, most often, manifests itself only in private. But in the company, especially when there are still representatives of the male sex, such young people behave extremely contradictory as to what you see while remaining with him alone.
Initially, this game is a bad person, can even amuse, but, in time, it becomes clear that due to this behavior, a man constantly undermines your trust. I hate the guy, I love the guy ... why? You love him for what he really is, and you hate for a mask that he skillfully or quite ineptly shows before other people.
How to deal with this situation? Of course, it is worth considering whether you need to continue the relationship with a person who does not know how to be yourself. Often, such men have many complexes, hailing from childhood. They can talk about it aloud or persistently deny, but their behavior is always the best proof.
Because of their negative attitude towards themselves, these guys come up with different ways to arouse people's respect or fear. It can be self-assertion at the expense of others, ostentatious cruelty or simply inadequate positioning of oneself, which disgusts others. If you notice that a young man is constantly trying to humiliate someone and offend, he can raise his hand against a woman, show cunning and meanness - go away. Sooner or later, he will show a similar attitude to yourself. Such people hate themselves so much that they climb out of their way, proving to others that they are nothing. That's why, even if you feel that you love him, still assemble your will into a fist and break off such a relationship, because it will only get worse. As a result, you parted, but you will have long wounds in your soul and a black hole in your heart. You will forget that you once loved him, and the only feeling, will be only burning. Infinite hatred. So think about whether to poison your soul with anger, when you can stop everything on time.
It's quite another thing, if you understand that your behavior, a young man harms only yourself. In this case, the guys usually refer to the people around them, sufficiently respectful, never humiliate anyone, even if they speak of hatred of the whole of mankind. In fact, these are courteous and pleasant young people. True, their "pleasantness", they show extremely rarely, when they forget that they need to play their part. Often, such a man tries to show with his whole appearance how bad and spoiled he is, he tells about himself unpleasant stories and threatens to prove all of this in practice. Of course, he does not go further than words, but others perceive everything at face value and refer to him, in accordance with this behavior.
Of course, girls are not so dependent on public opinion as men, but, nevertheless, it is extremely unpleasant when your loved one is considered inadequate schizophrenic and perverted. At such moments, a wave of hatred covers the head. What should we do in this situation? Of course, do not forget that a young man can behave all his life and play a bad boy. Most likely, alone he will be kind, gentle and erudite, but in public he can not not put on his mask. This indicates his weakness and dependence. Do you need such a man? If the answer is yes, then you need to try to change it. And work will have to be hidden and long. Such people do not change in one day, because the complexes, which are the root cause of this behavior, originated a very long time, deeply sprouted into the psyche and are not going to give up easily, and leave their master.
You will have to be patient and forget about your hatred. Such people really need love. Not ostentatious, almost invisible, kindness and care. Try to talk more with him to find out the actual causes of his complexes and dislike for yourself.
Try to convince him that he is worthy of happiness and can achieve a lot in life. But in any case, do not let your words sound like an unshakable fact, with which he has no right to argue. Human stubbornness will cause your boyfriend to give up everything you said, even if, in fact, he realizes that it's true. Therefore, just give him food for thought. Speak about everything, as it were, among other things.
By the way, do not assume that you need to agree with him in everything. On the contrary, it is necessary to discuss, but do not turn the conversation into a dispute with foam at the mouth, scandal and hysteria. A man must feel that there is a wise, reasonable person next to him. Then, with time, willy-nilly, he will begin to feel in you an authority and almost subconsciously heed the above.
Love is a strange thing. Therefore, as if we sometimes did not think that we hated our beloved with all our soul, time passes and anger fades away. Therefore, try not to waste your energy on such senseless feelings. Better direct all the energy to help your loved one. And to rush from "I hate a guy" to "I love my boyfriend" is definitely not a way out. Especially in case you want to find this very outlet.