When my child was lying in a stroller, I really wanted to quickly come the time when we can play in the sandbox. The time has come, and I was completely unprepared for communication with other children. How to behave if a child wants to play with someone else's toy, and another child does not want to give? What if we take a toy and the child cries? Is it worth it to return or let another child play? What if another child throws sand and his mother does not react? Should the child be taught to give change or not? Who can explain, teach and show in his example to a child how to behave and communicate with other children? Of course, parents and, first of all, mother.
How to behave in conflicts between children? We look at the situation. Maybe another child did not want to offend your child, but it happened. For example, accidentally stumbled and pushed your child. Therefore, your child needs to explain that the girl did not want or the boy did not want to offend him.If everything was deliberate, then sit down in front of another's child squatting and say the whole situation that happened. "I do not like that you took the toys from Andryusha. If you want to play with his toys, you need to ask for permission. If Andryusha does not mind, he will share with you. And now I'll have to pick up the car from you, because Andrew is not happy (your child cries). " Also, we explain to our child that we must ask permission from the owner of the toy. When my child wanted to play with someone else's toy, we approached another child, and I said something like this: "Andrew would love to play around with your typewriter, and he offers you his typewriter. If you do not mind, let's change. "
If someone else's child does not mind, then an exchange is made, but, at the first request of another child or yours, the toys are returned to the owners. After all, for a child, a toy is not just some trinket, it's his personal thing, his world, which only he has the right to possess. I feel sorry for the children on the playground, which my mothers say, do not be greedy, let the little one play. By this they give their child to understand that in this world nothing belongs to him, and he can not dispose of his own things. Imagine only that if this mother were asked for earrings or a chain, because the mother is not greedy, would she have given it up? I do not think so.
If another child throws sand at all, then we also express our displeasure. Calmly take the child by the hand and say that you do not like it when throwing sand, if you want to leave, you can, for example, leave the ball in the wall or play with another child in the ball.
When your child learns to speak, he can say that he does not like. For now, you are voicing. If the child is hit, then you also need to tell the offender that you do not like that he hit your child, it hurts.
If mothers knew that children under the age of 8 can not consciously regulate their behavior and can sometimes even commit inappropriate actions, they would not pour their aggression on older children. Sometimes it is enough for children that someone explains to them that in this situation he is not entirely right. Children accept the rules that adults set on the site, for example, to swing on a swing it is necessary in turn, stop the carousel, if small ask, etc. However, the education of someone else's child should not be part of your duties, it is the duty of his parents.
Not in any way you can not teach your child to give change. Not everything is solved by force. It is important to teach the child to negotiate.
If the initiator of the conflict was your child, then we explain to your child that there are actions for which you need to answer. And, that there are other adults who can express their discontent, scold, scream.
When the child is not yet able to speak and only the mother can understand what the child wants, the mother must voice her child's desires. Children copy the behavior of parents, like a sponge absorb information from the outside world. Nobody argues with the fact that the duty of parents is to teach the child to interact with this world, to choose, to get in touch, to find compromises.