The most effective type of cooperation in all spheres of human activity is the division of duties (roles), the same applies to the family. If each of the spouses know and successfully copes with their roles, then the family is doomed to success. Problems begin to arise when the husband or wife, or both have no desire to perform their functions, try to overpower others, or interfere in the role of another. Impeccable wife builds a career in the family. Her role is exclusively feminine, is to support her husband, help in the performance of his functions, but not to do his work for the spouse.
Efficiency and dedication in the performance of their roles are always accompanied by great success in family, business and social life. And it's quite the opposite, when one of the members of the family tries to play other people's roles, refuses to perform their functions, or is too concerned with how others perform their functions, playing the role of a strict overseer.
Success in the performance of your functions depends on how well you perform your female role in life and in the family in particular. This should concern only you. It is possible that you have the opportunity to hire assistants to organize home life, or to ask you to help children in this. But in any case, the responsibility for order in this area lies only on you.
Having mastered women's skills and abilities, you can achieve even greater success in the family field. To do this, you can learn how to cook, housekeeping, arrange a home life so that it is comfortable. Pay attention to women's frugality and the upbringing of children. Devote yourself fully to the family and make every effort to achieve harmony and well-being in the home.
The fact that you will help your husband to achieve success in the performance of his function will also be your success in creating a prosperous family. The knowledge of three men's needs will help you in this:
- A man should be able to perform his functions as head of family, breadwinner and defender.
- A man should feel this need in his family.
- It is important that a man has superiority over a woman in this field.
In modern society, the tendency is that these initial principles are constantly violated. There was an invasion of the woman on the territory of a man. As a result, we have a generation of mothers who work, compete with men in moving up the career ladder, in terms of income.
In the home environment, too, not everything is calm. A woman is used to being a leader at work, and she tries to do the same at home, doing things her own way. The woman began to perform many functions, male by definition, independently. The big loss for both of them is that the woman became independent, and this leads to the fact that she has ceased to feel the need to protect the man and his provision.
Because a man does not feel the need for his masculine functions, he does not feel the need for himself, and therefore does not feel the need to be a real man. In order to more closely match the work undertaken, a woman acquires masculine characteristics of character. This means the loss of femininity, inherent in female charm and feminine tenderness. A woman becomes stressed, there is a constant nervousness when she tries to take responsibility for the one that a man should normally take. This provokes the loss of so much important and necessary tranquility that is needed to create a happy family. If a woman spends a lot of time and energy to do the work intended for men, she throws away from herself those important functions that are peculiar to the woman. As a result, the whole family loses.
To the family was successful and happy, a woman must firmly remember that the man is the head of the family, the breadwinner and the defender. Happiness of the husband directly depends on how he performs his male role in the family, and whether you feel your support, your need for the family. Leave the man the opportunity to lead the family, do male work in the house, provide everything you need and family. Only an extreme need can allow you to go beyond the boundaries of your functions and perform masculine work.
Do not expect from men perfection in the performance of his male role. You will do better for yourself and for a man, if you do not carp at trifles and interfere with his activities. If you are faced with problems, and a man does not use his masculine functions as a defender, you should not complain. It will be better if you just say that you have a problem, clearly and clearly tell him the main essence of the problem and what the consequences may be. The next step is the question: "What are your thoughts on this matter? What can be done in this situation? ". Thus, you will let him know that he is the head of the family, give your difficulty to your man, and this will be a good occasion for a man to feel needed. Changes can take quite some time, so it is recommended that you have patience in the event that a man does not take up the issue even after you tell him everything.
The beginning of change can be put the praise of a man. A man's role is not so easy to perform and soon you will know why. The greatest reward for a man will be your praise. Do not regret the words of gratitude. The effect will be greater than when a man receives a reward for work. And do not forget to constantly and responsibly fulfill your responsibilities for arranging a home. Thus, you will be able to draw a clear line between the functions of a man and a woman, and help to successfully manage men's affairs to men.
If you do not clearly define male and female roles, then this threatens confusion of functions. And then the man starts to do some part of the female work, and the woman - the male. Everything is fixable, if such a distribution of roles is temporary, but in the case when it happens constantly, then the integrity of the family is harmful.
In the education of children, it is necessary to pay attention to the development of natural properties by sexual identification, and for this they need to observe in parents sufficiently clear images of a man and a woman for their own imitation. In the performance of her female role, my mother shows her gentle female image. When she performs her women's affairs with such love and tenderness that can be inherent only to women, when she walks in womanly clothes, gently cares for children, fulfills her household duties, then looking at her, the children form a female image. When she, in the performance of her functions, radiates satisfaction with her life and happiness, a woman helps her children draw a favorable picture of femininity.
When children see in the father of a strong leader, when the father shows his functions as breadwinner and protector in action, when he takes responsibility with confidence, while enjoying what is happening, this forms a fertile ground for the development of such qualities in sons and become an example for the future husband to the girls. Girls will be drawn to the feminine, and boys - to the courageous in the case when the family has a clear visual difference in the images of men and women.
If the family folds not as determined by nature, when there are no clear boundaries between the distribution of functions, then this can be a serious problem. According to statistics in homes where the responsibilities of men and women were indistinct, there were often instances of homosexuality. Children in families with similar foundations could not get a specific idea of male and female functions, and they did not have an ideal for imitation.
The process of education will teach children a lot of things that will help them to successfully move through life in order to be happy. However, the most important thing that children can learn in a family is a boy to become courageous, and a girl to be feminine.