There are situations when people with whom we communicate and who are dear to us do wrong, but they absolutely do not want to admit their mistakes and start to come up with a thousand excuses for any argument. How in this case should we behave and what methods of persuasion to use to bring to the person that he really is wrong and should not do so in the future in this way?
Do not doubt
When a person tries to justify himself, yet at heart he understands that he is wrong, but he convinces himself and does everything to convince you. Its task is to throw doubts in your mind. Therefore, first of all, you should not allow yourself to think about its arguments, otherwise, especially when the opponent is able to speak correctly, it is you who will prove to be wrong. Therefore, during a conversation, do not let a man justify himself. You should just express your thoughts by stressing that it is the empowerment that is right, and that he is doing what justifies himself and then, after a while, simply retire. Remember that such people never recognize their mistakes immediately, so you need to give him time to think over your words. But the conversation must be finished so that he understands: you have not accepted his excuses and are going to stand on your own until the last.
Social sharing
For such people is very important is the opinion of friends and acquaintances, or rather, their agreement with his actions. Therefore, if you have common friends who agree with you, not with him, be sure to talk with him all together. When the opinion is expressed only by you, he convinces himself that you are exaggerating or looking at the situation from the wrong perspective. But when a few more people will talk about it and their opinions will converge with yours, the stubborn will involuntarily have to think about his actions. The main thing is not to create a situation in which he will have to justify himself and defend himself. Remember that the conversation should proceed in such a way that people do not blame anyone for all their sins, but try to point out his mistakes, because they love and want him to be happier. Remember that during this conversation a person can lead himself in absolutely different ways: pretend that he agrees, blaming everyone for being bad friends, just making excuses, as he did before. In any case, you should not "lead" on its negative attacks and arrange a quarrel. If this person really does, you need to tolerate his behavior. Although, in the case when everything starts to go beyond, you can tell him that people, of course, love him, but if he does not begin to behave like an adult, an adequate person, then communication will stop at all.
Authority
Fortunately, every person has authority. Ietim can be used skillfully in such situations. The main thing is that you should be absolutely sure that this person is authoritative for your loved one. Before you arrange a conversation with this person, talk to him and explain to him what the problem is and what you want to do. Authority should know which points to press him and what tactics to use. Never be afraid to seek help from such a person, even if it is someone from the elders: a father, an uncle. Many people worry that I can hide some secrets of a person and he will be offended. In fact, if you see that his actions are causing trouble to others and himself, you should do it. Yes, at first he may well become angry with you. But over time it will become clear to him that this is the act of the matchmaker's parties that was the most faithful, perhaps he will also thank you. Therefore, referring to kavtoriteu do not hide anything, so that he could understand what the problem is. If you are present at such a conversation, it's best to say nothing and just listen. The fact is that when a person talks to the one to whom he listens, any other expressions of thoughts from other people are perceived solely as an undermining of a person authoritative for him. So give the reins in the hand, on whom your loved one equals and give them the opportunity to solve the problem together.
Resentment
If you have already tried all methods and methods, but the person does not act anyway, then you can take offense at him. Of course, this option is the most extreme, but sometimes you have to resort to this method of influence on the person. True, it only works if you are really dear to him and he does not want to lose you. If the situation develops this way, then you can press on his feelings. Just do not make a scandal, shout at him and cry. On the contrary, it is necessary to speak very calmly and coldly. You must explain to him that he does not understand your words and does not want to listen to them at all. In his turn, you are unpleasant and unacceptable in his behavior in some situations. Vypoprostu very much disappointed in him and do not know how to communicate with him further, if he does not want to fix anything. And since you do not have the right to tell him how to live and what decisions to take, but at the same time you can not put up with the current course of events, then you better not talk for a while, and maybe in a permanent way. Of course, this behavior looks quite cruel and you can use similar methods only if you see that a person really makes serious mistakes, from which he must be saved by any means, otherwise all will suffer. In this case, you must be completely confident in what you say, so that your loved one does not suspect that this is a game. In such situations, a sense of fear often plays a very important role. It makes it possible to rethink everything and to look at the situation from the right side. The person simply begins to understand that his pride, which most often leads the desire not to admit mistakes, is not as important as a close person whom he can lose right now. In addition, by putting someone in similar emotional conditions, you can achieve the greatest result, because with the impact of strong emotions, people are much more aware of their mistakes. If in the wine case he can only pretend that everything is recognized, and then proceed in the same way, then being afraid of losing a friend, he really decides not to make more of such mistakes. But still it is undesirable to resort to such a method, because people should be aware of their mistakes independently, and not take them under pressure of fear. Just in the case of deliberate introspection, the chance that a person will not take their mistakes in the future is significantly reduced. In fear, he is aware of his current problem, but in the future everything can happen again.