Each parent will confirm that raising a child is not a simple matter, in which not only care, attention and certain actions are important, but every word said to the child. Psychologists involved in children's psyche, strongly recommend that parents think about what, and most importantly, how they tell their children. Even the smallest detail, told by an adult, can injure a child, regardless of his age. In this article I would like to note a number of statements peculiar to some adults who may not have a very good impact on children. But it should be borne in mind that not all councils should be taken as dogma, because every child, though small, is still a person.
1. You do everything netak - I'll do it myself!
Every psychologist will tell you that such statements hurt the child. Such conversations awaken in the child the fear that he is stupid and stupid, that my mother will be unhappy and will again scold. Such thoughts can develop into complexes that do not allow children to be more proactive.
2. On, take, the main thing calm down!
It is difficult for many parents to withstand the constant nagging and begging of their children. Therefore, adults agree to yield to a small tyrant, if only he left them alone. But this is not the most correct approach in terms of upbringing, because if you give one to a child, he will subconsciously already know how to act to get what you want. In this way, the parental authority is lost, and the prohibitions on the child's childhood mean little.
3. If I repeat it again, I'll give it to you!
Remember, if you are warning your child of anything, then bring your warnings to the point, do not limit yourself to empty threats. The essence of such "empty" statements does not reach the child. This council does not in any way call to threaten their children, just the child must understand that for a crime or disobedience there will be punishment, in seeing the gratification of their parents, for example, which is not to be expressed sharply, adelicate. Try to convey to the child without screaming what and why he does not have any.
4. I told anyone (a) immediately stop!
You do not have to be so sharp with your baby. But if you really did not hold out, apologize. After all, a sharp word from parents can be perceived by the child too close to the heart. The reaction to such statements may not be obedient obedience, but a violent protest, in the form of tears and screams.
5. You do understand that ...
Most children will not accept such a phrase, too adult for them. Most likely, he will simply be engaged in what is more interesting at the moment. The child will pay even less attention to such statements, if he is dissatisfied or excited. Understand, in such situations, the main thing is to find the golden mean between screaming and mournful teachings.
6. Good girls (boys) do not do that!
It is not necessary to repeat the statements of this kind too often, because it is at an early age in a man that the foundations of certain rules and norms arise, which in the future can develop into complexes that interfere with life in general. And these statements may not be very well influenced by the views of the growing little man.
7. Do not cry for trifles!
Why did you decide that what is not important to you is such a small thing for your child? At this particular time, his understanding is focused on what is very important to him, and if he is upset to better reassure him by showing participation, not indifference. After all, this may depend on your further relationship.
8. Think about my health!
It happens that moms address this appeal to their children. This in the future can play with you a cruel joke. Sooner or later the child will stop taking these statements seriously, and even if it turns out that the mother herself will not feel really important, the baby will be cut off, that it's not serious and does not consider it necessary to reckon with either your requests or your well-being.
9. No, I will not buy it too much (there is no money)!
It's hard to explain to a child why mom does not buy everything at once, especially when there are so many temptations around. But when answering the child's requests in a similar way, you involuntarily lead him to the conclusion that if there is a lot of money, you can buy everything. Ignore the child's requests also should not, it is better to give reason enough for him to refuse from unplanned purchases.
10. Here is someone (neighbor, friend), normal children, and you ...
... such - syakoy, inattentive, dirty, straggling and prochee. It is not necessary to impose such shortcuts on children since childhood, this is a direct way to an inferiority complex. Your child is as good as he is, and let him know that you love him for it.