- And I? And Mike? Do not leave us! How can you do this? "Stop!" - The husband pushed me and slammed the door. And then I found out that he lives with a young saleswoman who worked in the nearest supermarket. The blow was too unexpected. I fell into depression and stopped noticing everything around me. Mike was crying, pulling:
- Mom, Mom, wake up! I'm scared when you're so ...
"What is it?" I spoke in an indifferent voice to her words.
Is there any point in living? Why, if you are thrown, like a bothersome thing? No one will give a helping hand, will not understand. For what? Walked in a closed circle of resentment and anguish, and only when my mother settled, she moved away. "You have a bad influence on Maya," she said. - I decided to spit on my life, this is your business, but you are responsible for the fate of the girl. Do not forget about it. Your daughter may perish. " And I woke up ...
With bitterness, Mikkin looked around her pantyhose with holey heels, remembered the tea with bread that she had set before her daughter instead of dinner, and was horrified at her own selfishness! How could I have been so desperate to forget about my daughter! My husband's departure is hard for me, but for my daughter, my father's betrayal is a real shock. How could I not have noticed her grief? And life abruptly changed. If yesterday I hardly found the strength to go to work, I now zealously began to earn money. "My daughter needs a lot," she repeated to herself as though she were a spell. - Mayechka will have all the best! The former husband will be surprised that I was able to grow my daughter on my own, give her an education and put her on her feet.
After the divorce, a year passed. Mike was sixteen, and she really needed a lot. Now I understand that both my bitter despondency and my fanatical zeal in work have equally deprived my daughter of the main thing - my attention, my concern and affection. At first I did not notice my daughter, later I physically did not have enough time to deal with her problems. Yes, I earned a lot. But not enough to feel that my work can provide my and Maikin's stability in the future.
What was happening all this time with my daughter , I had no idea. When I got home, Mike, as a rule, was already asleep, and sometimes I did not even bother to look into her room. That's how we lived. I plowed and my daughter was studying, and it's not known what would be the tragedy if I did not ... dislocate my leg one day. No wonder they say that there would be no happiness, but misfortune helped. Involuntarily I observed the life of my daughter, and the discoveries that occurred before my eyes were very alarming. I suddenly noticed that Mike was very thin, and her mood was depressed.
- Daughter, you feel bad? Maya shrugged her shoulders. But most of all I was amazed by her answer:
"Do not you care?"
"Maya!" How do you talk to me? - Outraged. She told me how her husband used to be:
- Get off ...
I began to look more closely at my daughter. Something strange was happening to her. Maya ate a lot, but for some reason she was embarrassed by this. I put before her a plate with a chop and potatoes, and she languidly poked a fork into the meat:
- There is a reluctance. I'm already so fat.
"You're going to exhaust yourself," I was worried. - Eat.
She pushed the plate aside, but somehow I noticed that she eagerly eats the same chop and potatoes secretly. "It's okay," she reassured herself. "The baby is growing, the body needs extra calories." But after a day Maikin's appetite surprised me.
I found my daughter, who was pushing a cookie in her mouth with a handful.
- Well, you have a diet! Do not be silly, Mike. Eat well, and you do not have to eat after lunch or dinner. My daughter glanced at me angrily and grumbled: "It's none of your business."
- What does it mean? Who told you that it's none of my business? - I was indignant, and my daughter contemptuously replied:
"I wish you'd already recovered and went to work."
- Oh my God! Mike! Do I really disturb you so much ?! - I was offended.
- You? She screamed. - Yes, you do not notice me at all! It's like I'm not. Are you lost somewhere for days, and now you decided to ask questions?
I also could not restrain myself:
- I'm lost ?! I work hard so that you have everything you need! She covered her ears with her hands and rushed for some reason not to her room, but to the toilet. I heard convulsive sounds of vomiting and became worried. Is Mike hiding something from me?
I returned to work, but anxiety for my daughter settled in the shower and did not let go. At the same time strange things were happening at home. In the evening I brought home a stock of food for a week: a kilogram of good sausage, several packages of pelmeni, cheese, sour cream, milk, vegetables, fruit, sweets, and the next day the refrigerator was empty. "Maya, where did the food go?"
"Friends came to me ..." answered my daughter. I did not believe her, because I knew that Mikey had no friends. When I told her about it, she got up:
- And I asked to transfer me to the school where Lyusya is studying!
Lusia is an old friend of Maya, but she went to a weak school, and I had a goal to transfer my daughter to a prestigious educational institution.
- Find a common language with the guys in the new school, - advised, but Mike looked at me angrily. I decided that with the health of the daughter is not all right. Mike was losing weight, but ate a lot and often. And this vomiting ... Suddenly a terrible guess shocked me. Is Mike pregnant? Appetite, vomit ...
- Daughter, when was the last time you had a period? She asked once. She thought, shrugged her shoulders:
- I do not remember...
I did not dare to drag my daughter to the gynecologist . I bought a package of sanitary napkins, put my daughter in the bedside table. Two weeks later I checked. Everything is in place. The guess was confirmed! I was horrified, but in the evening I decided to seriously talk with my daughter. She pushed the door of her room and stunned her. Mike sat on the bed with her teeth and tore off pieces from a stick of smoked sausage. Nearby lay empty crumpled boxes of yogurt. Pieces of eight to ten.
- Majechka ... - I was so confused that I almost fainted, because the picture was not for the faint-hearted.
My daughter flushed, nervously raked food.
- It is necessary to knock! Or did not they teach you ?! I burst into tears. She sat next to her.
"I can see what's happening to you!" Do not you want to share with me?
"I remembered something late ..." the daughter replied contemptuously, and, bending over, ran to the toilet.
"God ..." I whispered as she left the bathroom. - You are pregnant? - asked cautiously when Maya, exhausted by a prolonged vomiting, tiredly lay on the bed.
"What a thought!" You're crazy! She snapped.
"Do not lie," she said calmly. - You do not have monthly.
- May be. But the guy, too, no!
"But it makes you sick ..."
"I'm sick of this terrible life!" Tears flowed from her eyes.
"How can you say that, Maya ?!" - I was frightened. "You have everything!" You have such prospects ... She interrupted me with a question:
- Do you want to know what really makes me happy? Food! That's what!
"Food?" - I did not understand.
-I want to eat always! - Maya spoke quickly, as if she were in a hurry to pour on me everything that she had been hiding for so long. - I want to eat always and everywhere. I'm happy only when I eat, and then ... Then I get nauseous, the intestines turn out, and I want to eat again ...
She spoke, and in my brain the beautiful word "bulimia" was already spinning . I had to witness the death of this disease of a woman, our neighbor. I was a girl then. Next to us lived an ordinary family: husband, wife, son. The woman was thin, but her eerie appetite marveled at the whole county. She ate everything and often. But I was told about the terrible attacks of vomiting that tortured her. She died of exhaustion. It was not death itself that shocked her at that time - her reason ... "Is it possible to die from eating? And what kind of illness is this - the more you eat, the more you remind the skeleton ?! "- I was perplexed then.
Mike told me, and I could feel my legs grow numb with terror. The night did not sleep. And before deciding what to do, I searched the Internet for information about bulimia. The World Wide Web spit out so much horror that I lost my peace. One thought knocked in the brain: faster, faster, faster ... God forbid ... And I remembered my deceased neighbor. Now I began to understand this illogical for a young age of depression, which corroded Mikey's soul. It is necessary to prove to the daughter that it makes sense to fight to defeat the disease.
- It's a disease? But all people eat ...
- But not all vomit after eating, not all are suffering animal hunger.
- Why does this disease happen? Asked her daughter, and I shrugged.
- Doctors do not know the causes of bulimia. But they have learned to cope with this disease perfectly. I read the scientific work of one venerable psychiatrist ... Mike jumped up and yelled:
- Psychiatrist? No, I'm not going to the psychiatrist! I'm in my mind!
Oh, and it was hard to convince the daughter to go to the doctor! It took more than a month, and during this time Mike did not change her habits at all. She still did not eat much in my presence, but then I shoveled out of her room a mountain of wrappers from chocolate, biscuits and sweets. My daughter did not obey me. My mom helped.
- Just try to wave on the child's hand!
"No, I will not give up," I told myself, and every evening I continued to persuade my daughter to go to see the doctors.
It soon became clear that in our city there is only one specialist who had previously dealt with bulimia. I understood that the treatment will be long and complex. Mike surrendered unexpectedly. Once, vomiting attacks so exhausted her that when she staggered out of the toilet, whispered only one word: "I agree ..." I can not say that it became easier. But Mika and I did not lower our hands, because we saw clearly the prospects together with the problems.
- And I will be tormented by terrible attacks of vomiting?
- Yes my Sunshine. And your mood then will be joyful, and friends will be next to you ...
I did not say empty words. I transferred Mike to the school where Lyusya studied. Doctors recommended creating maximum psychological comfort, and I knew that communication with Lyusya would help Maya. And I had to prove to my daughter that for me there is nobody and nothing more important than her.
"I'm with you, dear, I'll help you in everything, dear," Mike repeated daily as a spell.
And every day I tried to prove to her my love . Gradually, our relationship began to improve. A year has passed, and my daughter and I are only at the beginning of the road to recovery. But if earlier on several times a day Mike was rushing to the toilet to rip out the food, now the attacks happen less and less. In the last month, only twice it became bad. And she now eats differently - in accordance with the recommendations of doctors. Another became and her lifestyle! When, one day, an unexpected nausea came to her throat, she turned pale, but said firmly:
"This is the last time, more this will never happen again."
I believe in it and believe in myself. We will be able to return Maikino's health. And recently my daughter returned from a walk and happily informed me:
- Mom, I'm in love!
At that moment I somehow decided that my daughter had a menstrual cycle restored, disturbed by bulimia.
- Great news!
- Mom, can we invite him on Sunday for lunch? - asked my girl, and I nodded.
Mike is no longer afraid to sit at the table and eat in the presence of strangers. She will definitely be healthy. And happy ...