Who is a modern Cinderella? A woman in an image, behind which hides a sensual and vulnerable nature or a girl who drags along a lot of children's complexes? Let's get straightened and put all the points in their places.
Complex Cinderella, almost like all other complexes, is formed and appears in childhood. However, it is not necessary to draw parallels between each other and the heroine of Cinderella from the fairy tale of Charles Perro. Of course, modern Cinderella is a prototype of the main character, however, life can be quite different from the plot of the fairy tale that the writer invented. For example, she can be born and live in a well-to-do, full-fledged family, and she is surrounded by love parents. But her vital views and character are filled with special priorities and features, which in the future will shape this image of Cinderella.
Complex good girl
Let's try to compare the character of modern Cinderella with the collection of the heroine from the famous fairy tale. Zolushka was very compliant, kind, humble and reliable, she always tried to follow all directions to the relatives, and especially her opinion was important for her. This kind and lonely girl was most afraid that she would be rejected and abandoned.
After all, why do many girls want to please their father, seem to be the eyes of innocent, innocent, pure and childishly naive little daddy girls? This is due to the fact that not all fathers give their love in full. Many of us had to deserve their love from the very beginning. Mom always said: "Do not run, study well, do not do this, otherwise the father will be upset."
The popes did not even think that, frightening their daughters with anger, they could for the rest of their lives form a "good girl" complex, which can only deserve the father's love for good behavior and right actions, although she herself loves the pope. A good girl can not afford to do something that her father forbids and commit those deeds that are contrary to the will of the father. She can not firmly and out loudly say "I do not want", "no," "I will not." Such girls are still trying to justify their father's hopes, otherwise the father will become angry, and live in captivity of the mother's installations.
But is there a way out of this situation?
Cinderella is a very kind and positive character of that time, you can even say an exemplary one, you can not argue with that. The writer Charles Perrault wrote this tale in the 17th century, when Cinderella dreamed of being every girl, because she was the embodiment of perfect and perfect feminine qualities. It's on time. And such character traits as a sense of duty, altruism, faith in miracles, humility and submissiveness form in the girl not the image of the ideal woman, as quickly as possible the victim complex. So a woman can never improve her self-esteem, much less reinforce her. If you have such traits of character, then try to release them, get rid of them, you do not need them.
Relations with men
Fairy Cinderella dreamed of only one man, he was the only one in her life and she humbly waited for him. Of course, she waited for him, but they helped her. After all, her godmother was a fairy, who constantly helped her and made a wonderful reincarnation in appearance. Even despite the fact that Cinderella has changed inwardly, she did not lift her head, her worldview has not changed, she remained a kind and peace-loving girl. This did not allow her to gain assurance of diligence. She even in an ideal order timidly lowered her eyes when her beloved man - the prince made her offerings and hearts. But until now no one knows after the wedding they lived happily or not.
Modern Cinderella like a beloved heroine is waiting for her prince on a white horse. But you will agree that the fairy-tale plot is unlikely to be repeated in real life. Even if modern princes and look for such girls, there is no guarantee that they will not soon become bored with them.
Is there an exit?
We all know that a man is a getter. And the prince of the fairy tales was a clear example of this. He met a stranger, fell in love with her, and then stubbornly sought out and hunted for her. However, his heart was not conquered by a fine order or even beauty, but most of all obstinacy and mystery. After all, all the girls ran after the prince and dreamed of marrying him, and Cinderella dared to escape from him. Only she was able to surprise him, he realized that it was unusual, that's why he was looking for it. The fairy tale tells us that the prince was looking for a mysterious, amazing and unique woman - this can be read between the lines. It does not say that the prince needs humility, obedience and obligingness, he was looking for a real princess. But nobody knows if Cinderella justified the Prince's hopes in marriage.
Men like interesting women who show initiative, otherwise they soon become uninteresting to them. Of course, she must love children, be a faithful wife, an excellent mistress and a good mother. But prince was unable to disclose in her the one that surprises, beckons with a glance, fascinates with its gracefulness, seduces, seduces, and most importantly - radiates a unique and inexplicable inner beauty and confidence. After all, any woman must be developed diversely and all the more be harmonious in everything, that's what love is about, right?
If you are a modern Cinderella, then pay attention first to your personality, desires and needs. Because only the orientation of the naming of others and low self-esteem force you to abandon yourself, to believe that happiness will come only with the advent of the prince in your life, because in themselves you have no idea.
However, each Cinderella has many positive qualities, they are caring, sincere, benevolent and able to forgive the offenders. But you absolutely do not value yourself, and attach great importance to your shortcomings.
You will benefit from trainings and techniques that are aimed at developing self-confidence and increasing self-esteem. Of course, to achieve a good and, most importantly, the desired result, you will need more than one month, but believe me, the efforts expended will give you much more. To progress did not force yourself to wait for a consultation with a qualified psychologist. Cinderellas painfully obsessed with hints about the prince, and this destroys real life. Why go on the career ladder and get a higher education, if very soon I will meet that same prince? Does not he want to meet a successful and independent Cinderella, who is not in "steps" with her stepmother?
Every Cinderella must imagine how she will live without the prince. If he never meets your path, how will you live, and what will you do? Perhaps then you want to start learning, doing your favorite thing, finding a hobby and climbing the career ladder.
This is exactly what you need to do. And the prince, of course, will appear in your life, but a little later. When you know what you want from life, do not wait for the fact that life will be fine only when the prince appears and becomes a confident woman, love will appear in life.
After all, any girl who was once Cinderella, will know how to become successful and happy with her own forces without him.