According to global surveys, more than 60% of the inhabitants of our planet are not too happy with their lives. At the same time, 45% of them are afraid of change, and therefore are not ready to change something in their lives. How can we overcome this fear and meet changes in life, even if not with a smile and joy, then at least calmly?
Internal events can change a person's life for the better. But to find out if you want a change, answer the following questions:
- In your wardrobe for many years, the same colors predominate (mostly gray or brown)?
- Do not you leave the house without painting your lips?
- Are you convinced that you have only one haircut (the one that you have many years, of course)?
- Do you prefer to buy products of a well-known brand and not try anything new?
- You have many years to go to rest in the same place and are convinced that the best is the enemy of the good, and are not looking for good from the good?
"Have you been reshuffling in your room for several years?"
- Do you prefer to revise old good films, and new ones do not please you?
If at least one of these questions you answered in the affirmative, then for sure you think that your life is a continuous swamp, and terribly afraid of changes in life. Even if you do not admit it out loud. It is possible that you are so much easier to live (for example, you are a phlegmatic person). But do you know that your conservatism does not allow you to risk and win? Changes, as a rule, are for the better! It is no coincidence that one of the great Chinese sages said: "It will only be the way it is better, even if it is vice versa."
In order for inner inner events to change a person's life, it's not necessary to take drastic measures. You do not have to cut off the braid, get a haircut, wear a mini-skirt of red color and go to the tundra instead of the usual Crimea. It's enough to do half a step, try to change something first of all in yourself. Psychologists warn: you do not need to do something that contradicts your rules. You just have to feel the taste for change:
- Buy bright accessories for your usual outfits.
- Once in a lifetime go to work, not having made up.
- Put your hair in a new way.
- Go to a restaurant and order a dish with an incomprehensible and even unpronounceable name.
- Go to an unfamiliar country.
- And, of course, remember: you are beautiful, figurine, intelligent, talented, bright and extraordinary woman. This is your life, and therefore you can wear, buy and eat anything you like.
From small to great, as you know, one step. But it still needs to be done. Of course, it is very difficult to decide on global changes. However, even here psychologists offer us a secret algorithm for help: you need to realize that there are more advantages in the changes than minuses. Think over your life after the act you have done (for example, leaving from unloved work or remarriage). Make a decision and remain firmly convinced that it is correct. If that, just change it at the right time - no one takes away from you this opportunity.
Divorce, change of work, moving, repair, marriage, the birth of a child. Undoubtedly, all major changes are stress. And no matter how we prepare for them, it is almost impossible to protect ourselves from the experience. In addition, many of them literally fall on our heads. What to do? How to cope with sudden changes in life? The first thing to do is to accept the situation as it is. In the end, everything has already happened, and you can not rewind time back. Then try to find the pros. Of course, the change is different. For example, the birth of a child is a joyous event a priori. But in divorce, especially unwanted, there are few positive moments. Nevertheless, you must find them. Tell yourself: "But now I can meet with my friends as much as I like and do not cook garnish for meat!" Let it sound funny, but you can rejoice at these facts. Finally, plan your life in connection with new circumstances. The better your schedule is, the easier it will be for you to cope.
However, too frequent a habit to drastically change one's life can cause psychological instability. Sometimes the craving for change takes the form of a neurosis. If after six months of work in one place you start looking for something new, every three months you learn a new profession, change your hairstyle more than once a month and every week make a rearrangement in your room, most likely you should consult a specialist or think about your own life. The desire to constantly start something new is a symptom of a serious nervous breakdown. Think, what exactly prevents you from enjoying life? Maybe you just need to raise self-esteem. Even if you do not grab stars from the sky, the boss does not charge you bonuses and you do not look like Hollywood beauties - this is not a reason to not love yourself. You yourself must be groomed and cherished.
Not everything in life needs to be changed! In a difficult moment, listen to your intuition. After all, in fact, subconsciously, you already know the correct answer. If your sixth sense screams "no!" - once again weigh all the pros and cons and agree better with it.
By the way, psychologists strongly recommend talking to your inner self. Of course, not aloud and not in a public place, but, for example, to oneself before a dream. Overcome fear can help questions that repeat your own statements. Do not state the facts: "I'm afraid of losing this job." Ask an interrogative intonation: "Are you afraid of losing this job?" Interrogative intonation will make you look at the situation differently and overestimate it. After all, questions, as you know, give rise to answers. So many eminent psychologists begin to communicate with clients. The main thing, be sincere to yourself. Do not deceive yourself!
Almost every person had to face in life with the need to change something. However, unconditional readiness for change is not inherent in all, many are afraid and insecure. Attitude to changes in one's own life depends on various factors. Such as the mobility of the nervous system, personality characteristics or even world view. The current emotional state also plays an important role. Speed of decision-making, readiness for active actions, confidence - all these qualities necessary for changes can be both congenital and acquired. It should also be noted that each person has developed his own style of behavior and attitude to life, including change. Therefore, before you act in the direction of any changes, take into account your own particularities. If from a child you are sluggish, think about every decision for a long time, they are conservative in their views, then it is unlikely that you should turn your life around in an instant. It is better to consistently think over the result and go to it slowly, step by step calculating the moves. And if you are resolute, impetuous and active, then procrastination will only irritate you. In a situation where you suddenly found that you can not solve anything, whereas before it did not cause you any difficulties, you seemed to get into a stupor, any thought of changes causes fear and anxiety, it is necessary to remember at what moment it happened and what preceded such a change. In any case, you should think carefully and try to figure out what exactly you are afraid of. When fear is called, it is easier to overcome. But there are situations that can not be managed independently. Do not be afraid to ask for help from a friend, husband or psychologist. And remember that thanks to positive inner events, a person's life can change for the better. The main thing - do not be afraid of change!