But then the question arises, if your beloved and only husband has caused you a great deal of resentment by changing you, does he need to forgive his betrayal or is this not forgiving?
Let's say right away that this is not a bellitristic essay, but an article that should help you understand whether it is possible to forgive your beloved betrayal. And it's up to you to decide this based on the situation. Because there is no universal solution to this question. After all, you can forgive or not depends on many factors: on how much, when and with whom, on your relationship, the presence of children and other things.
Let's consider below, what to look for when deciding on forgiveness or not forgiving treason.
The severity of betrayal.
The severity of betrayal, no matter how difficult it is to guess, this concept is relative and in kilograms it can not be measured. After all, that one of the women will forgive quite easily, the other will not be forgiven for anything and never. But nevertheless, we can single out some general categories that we need to pay attention to. And it's probably best to start, with an estimate of the ratio of the duration of your relationship and betrayal.
After all, if after 10 years of joint and successful life your husband in one of the long trips could not resist the temptation of a young trainee, this is one thing, and if, only after a year of living together, your spouse changes you and your neighbor in a staircase, . In the first case, in general, it can be forgiven, and, probably, it is not necessary to completely break the already established relationship because of one single betrayal, of course the husband should apologize and repent. But in the second case, forgiving, probably, is not worth it, if he rushed to the first skirt you found literally under your nose and only after a year of living together, then even if your husband begs forgiveness on your knees, you should not believe in repentance.
Another indicator of the severity of treason is that it was single or periodic. After all, it's one thing to forgive the instant weakness, when the husband simply succumbed to passion, and another thing to forgive the realized treason, which he walked repeatedly behind your back. As hard as it is to understand, the first option is much easier to forgive than the second.
The third factor by which you can judge the severity of guilt is your relationship with your husband, at the time of treason. For example, if you quarreled a lot, and he left screwed up, loudly slamming the door, went to his friends in the company and there he changed, this one. But if he left on the Sabbath day, brazenly deceiving you, that he goes to friends, and he himself to the mistress, it's quite another matter. In the first case, the role was played by nerves and nervousness, and in the second it is an obvious and purposeful lie.
Concomitant factors.
By this general name we mean everything that is not directly related to your feelings - money, apartments, your past mistakes, etc., everything that does not directly affect the feelings, but strongly affects your way of life. These factors, too, can strongly swing the scales in the question, forgive or not forgive her husband's betrayal. That is, if you yourself have sinned, naturally you automatically have no right to accuse him of treason.
To all of the above, you can add the following, that you can forgive your husband only after he himself has asked for forgiveness and will be seen that he repents of his actions. If this is not, then even the most innocent infidelity can not be forgiven. And I will say again, to forgive my husband or not, this is a personal matter of your feelings, and it is worthwhile to orient yourself in it, rather than the opinion of others.