When we love someone, it seems that this person is the only thing necessary in life. Next to him I want to create, I want to reach the highest peaks, he simply makes me soar and feel in the seventh heaven with happiness. But when a loved one is not around, then the colors somehow fade, and everything seems not so delicious. On the one hand, such influence of love is positive, because it forces something to reach and simply feel happy. But on the other hand, is this normal, when a loved one turns into the meaning of life and without it you do not want anything?
Love dependency
When a person experiences a feeling of joy and happiness only next to his beloved, he becomes like a drug addict who gets a dose and feels positive emotions. But when the action of the drug passes, he does not feel well and he lives only by the desire to get another dose. Therefore, one can not say that love, in which the beloved becomes the whole world, is normal. This love really becomes addiction. Experiencing such feelings of a person is very easy to learn. He is joyful and happy only when the object of his feelings is near. When a loved one or a loved one leaves, his mood immediately deteriorates, and he becomes apathetic. Some people who see in their beloved the meaning of life, try to keep him close to each other and lead themselves hysterically, if they can not. Others, on the contrary, give their own personal space and do not pretend to do anything, but they still suffer from apathy and unwillingness to do something when there is not that single one nearby. In the first case, such love brings harm to the second half, and in the second - only to the enamored person. But anyway, this feeling is not normal. The fact is that it leads to the destruction of personality. Feeling joy only next to loved ones, a person gradually ceases to experience the same emotions, communicating with friends, doing something he once loved, and so on.
The meaning of life must be different
Reading the above, someone may have an impression that such strong feelings - it's bad. That is, a person can not be loved by someone with all his heart. In fact, such a judgment is erroneous. You can always love strongly and truly, but do not forget that you grow up individual with your life and your emotions. Many, seeing the love of a person in the meaning of life, stop thinking about themselves. They do everything to make it good and simply "spit" on their desires and needs. This is corneal correct. Firstly, by such behavior you indulge your loved one, and this, sooner or later, will lead to the fact that he will start using your selflessness. And one should not forget that one can only love a whole person who has his own opinion and his desires. And when someone becomes the meaning of life, people completely forget about themselves.
Many people think that it is good and right to love someone so much that his life becomes more important than his own. But nasamom fact, this only says that his own life for such a man is boring and uninteresting. He simply does not see anything in it that would make him interested in himself, with his desires and dreams. Therefore, if you feel that someone becomes your sense of life, you need to seriously think about what is wrong with you. Remember that normal relations undermine the freedom of action and interests of both partners. That is, apart from the person you love, you should have at least something else that keeps you in this world. It can be family, friends, favorite work. If there is no such thing in life, then it goes through inadequately. And because of this, a person who sees in another the meaning of life, begins to press on him and demand such a relationship. But if the second has other interests than the beloved, he can not give what he wants. And this is normal. But, unfortunately, the dependent does not accept such an arrangement of things, and this constantly leads to scandals and problems of relations.
How to act correctly?
If you feel that a loved one has become your meditative meaning of life, then you need to change something in this very life. Otherwise, your attitude will not lead to anything good. Just need to say that you do not need to give up your feelings. You can and should love a person just as strongly. Here it is a question of another. In this situation, you just need to work on yourself and expand your horizons. First, it will be difficult to do, because it may seem that without a loved one, everything is not as interesting bright and necessary. But here you must overcome yourself. In this case, always remind yourself that making your life more interesting, you positively affect your relationship. Thanks to the fact that you are engaged in some of their own affairs or communicate with friends, your loved one can relax a little from you. And this is necessary for everyone, even if he is madly in love with a person. Nobody can spend twenty-four hours a day with another person. If everything happens in this way, then people get bored with each other, irritate each other, and this starts to fade away feelings. Therefore, if you want that love glowed forever not only in your heart, but in the heart of your beloved person - learn to live your own life. You can get carried away by something, at least by playing basketball, even by weaving brakes. You can also walk with friends and spend time with your family. But in order for you to do this, you should enjoy this lesson, and not experience it as a penal servitude, waiting for a meeting with your loved one. You need to learn how to rejoice that there is here and now, even if at that moment a loved one is not around. Only having learned to receive real pleasure from something other than communicating and spending time with your loved one, you can really stop seeing the meaning of life only in it. And even if at first it seems to you that it is difficult and even impossible, very soon you will feel that everything is completely different. But do not forbid yourself to rejoice in anything other than the object of your love. Many women for some reason feel guilty when they begin to experience the joy of sharing with other people or interesting pursuits. This is fundamentally wrong. The non-terrific or shameful is that you rejoice in anything else except the loved one. On the contrary, this is correct and it makes you a living and diverse person. And your interests and joys do not detract from your love at all. On the contrary, they help it to reach a new level. So never be stupid because of stupid things and do not try to forbid yourself to feel what is normal for every person.
When we love someone before self-forgetfulness - this is the strongest feeling that you can experience. But if this love overlaps all other emotions, then you need to learn how to control a little. Always remember that in life, a person should have several goals and desires. Love is one of them, but not the only one.