Reasons for insult
To hurt us can be different things and different people, but the essence of the problems often comes down to just two reasons.
1) Mismatch of your expectations and actions of people around you.
Situations that lead to resentment, a great many. You can start some important business at home or at work, it is only natural that you count on support and help. It is especially offensive when you do not receive this support. Resentment occurs when close people do not hold back their promises, betray or substitute. Whatever the reasons for which our expectations are not justified, they always hurt.
2) Aggressive behavior of others.
Situations when the aggressive behavior of others cause resentment, are not so rare. This can be the usual street rudeness, bad manners of someone close or colleagues, intentional cruelty towards people. Naturally, such behavior causes resentment.
How to fight?
If you feel that the situation in which someone has offended you, has captured you too much, if you can not recover for a long time, if you take offense even at those little things that other people just do not notice, most likely it's time something to change in yourself.
To begin with, it is important to determine what it is - your resentment? It can be different. Perhaps you feel that you are unjustly offended and want to restore justice. Maybe you are angry and would like to take revenge on the offender. Anyway, this is a negative emotion, which you yourself sent inside of yourself.
First of all, do not indulge emotions, do not feel sorry for yourself and thereby only increase the grievance. Think about whether you really have the right to expect from this particular person something more than he can give you? Often touchy people suffer from the fact that they think that everyone around them must and must have something. Naturally, this is not so. Of course, mutual help is very important, but above all, a person must help himself.
If the grievance has taken possession of you, it is important to understand your emotions. Disassemble the situation in detail. You can take a sheet of paper, write on it everything that you feel, not embarrassed by emotions and expressions. Then write everything that you think is going to be done by someone in relation to you, but be guided only by the mind. In the dry balance, you get a golden mean, a sober look at what actually happened. You can be sure that no one wanted to offend you, at least on purpose.
For the future, learn to prevent the accumulation of resentment. If you see that an awkward situation has arisen between you and someone around you, it's better to immediately talk and calmly find out the relationship than to leave the omissions.
If you are unhappy with people's reaction to some of your actions, think that you have been underestimated or treated scornfully, think about the fact that only those who do nothing do not have a negative reaction to their actions. In addition, even negative feedback can be very useful, since you will have the opportunity to not make similar mistakes in the future.
Sooner or later everyone thinks about how to defeat an offense. If this feeling burdens you often and prevents you from being happy, consider if there are any other reasons. It's unlikely that people around you want to deliberately ruin your life. Most likely, you pay too much attention to small things, feel insecurity in yourself, and this already requires more detailed and serious work on yourself, perhaps with the help of a psychologist.