For many women, their family life is more like a horror film. And the reason for this is violence.
The topic of violence in the family is familiar to many, but not everyone has the courage to say it in a voice. We are ready to invent many reasons why we should endure, instead of saying "no" once. Hence, very deplorable statistics, even with the account that much remains behind the scenes. Every year, many women, one way or another, suffer from moral or physical violence in the family, at a time when a family member who acts as a rapist does not even receive a proper rebuff and introduces such treatment. The saddest thing is that many women simply do not know how to protect themselves from domestic violence. About this and talk.
Beats - then loves.
Probably, there is not a single woman who did not know this false proverb. Her authorship, most likely also belongs to a woman, and everything was invented, that would at least somehow justify the actions of her husband and his patience. But it's only in words, because what kind of love can there be, if pain is delivered?
A woman by nature is inferior to a man in physical strength, which often becomes the first reason for the emergence of aggression and the use of force, pressure, humiliation. The inability to rebuff, or simply fear, greatly aggravates the situation. Usually all inaction is justified by a single phrase: "but that would not be worse." And worse it happens in any case.
The manifestation of violence in the family may be of a different nature, and be psychological, sexual or physical. In any case, the injuries are serious. It is enough to imagine how a woman who feels fear, pain, oppression, and humiliation can feel herself and begins to believe that she is nobody in this life, and everything that happens around her is only her merit. Usually, if there are children in the aggressor's family, soon a wave of grasping and squashing, covers them, then the woman takes a double blow.
The most offensive is that due to "holes" in the legislation and just his ignorance, the rapist can not answer for his actions.
How to recognize the aggressor?
At first sight the future tyrant and rapist can be a friendly and nice person, always ready to come to the aid and not cause any suspicion. According to psychologists, aggression develops gradually, and manifests itself after several years of living together. Usually the first signal that an aggressor may appear in the house is not frequent, but uncontrolled outbursts of anger and irritability over trifles, excessive stubbornness and outright indignation when it is proved wrong. As a signal to fear should become aggressive behavior in the drunk state. After all, most rapists usually act only under the influence of alcohol, and on a sober head very much regret what they did. Usually at first violence manifests itself, how to say "tolerant" actions. A man in the midst of an argument can painfully grab for the hand, use insults, lightly push, apply force to improvised objects: be on the table, wall, throw objects, break them. Perhaps it will not be a few years, and you can become such an object for removing his anger. Of course, no one advises abandoning the faithful, it is necessary just while there is time to understand the root cause of this behavior and not allow repetition in the future. You can even get along with potential aggressors and rapists. There are men who recognize their own behavior and are independently prepared to fight this, such zeal can not be rejected, it is necessary to support and help it in every possible way. With this state of affairs, you will soon understand how to act to get rid of violence in the family.
Children.
As already mentioned, children are often the object of violence in the family. Usually, the mother simply can not protect them, or she herself is the object of bullying. Most often this happens in families where a woman is dependent on a man in material and housing terms. Because of the lack of any alternative, they simply have to endure, and make them tolerate children, because there is nowhere to go.
Children are the most vulnerable part of the population of any country, and as they say, anyone can offend a child. Often, child abuse is used by both parents, sort of as an educational goal, they say, to know their place. At the same time, few people take into account the fact that the child, who has suffered violence, will continue to become a victim. This will affect the relations in the teaching team, in communicating with peers, and then in adulthood. This manner of education is the reason for the formation of a specific psychological character trait. Typically, these children adjust themselves to constantly experience the duality of the senses. What affects their confidence and self-esteem. Even children who simply observed violence will already have mental disorders, and in the future, analyzing what is happening, feel the blame for the occurrence of this incident, even if there was none.
How to be?
If you become a victim, and do not know how you can protect yourself from domestic violence, your first act should be to recognize the fact of committing a violent act. A firm acknowledgment of the fact of this kind of crime will give you the confidence to confront. To date, there are many organizations whose work is aimed at combating the fact of the presence of family violence. In such centers you will be given all the necessary information, will provide psychological assistance and explain how to act in such situations. Just do not be afraid to contact the police, and other instances that defend human rights.
Another way to avoid violence is not to provoke it. If you know the reasons why a potential rapist may not hold back, avoid them, and do not allow such outbursts and try to leave for a while if the situation has gone too far.