Unfortunately, many people want to gain power over the feelings and emotions of others and use for this purpose such a method of psychological influence as manipulation. Of course, people who fall into the hands of such manipulators, often very much want to escape from this kind of control. The question is how to learn to resist the manipulator and not fall under its influence?
Do not go on about the feelings
Manipulators are always aware of your sick places and experiences. Therefore, they always press on pain points to achieve a result. Often the manipulators use your attitude to them. If the manipulator knows that you are very fond of him, he will blackmail you with his attitude. For example, the manipulator can declare that it will not communicate with you, if you do not fulfill its wishes, it can act and hide. For example, after hearing a refusal from you, he begins to take offense, threaten to part and so on. If you rush to do everything, as he says, apologize and fulfill all the whims, then his manipulations are successful. To prevent this from happening, you need to learn not the idyll about your feelings. Of course, each of us does not want to lose loved ones. But if such a person is a manipulator, you simply have to show him that his influence on you will not have the desired result. If a person really values you, he will stop trying to manipulate and establish normal, equitable relationships. If he continues to act in the same spirit and begins to fulfill his promises, then your relationship for him does not mean anything and such a person you do not need. Therefore, if you notice that the manipulator begins to play with your feelings, openly declare that you perfectly understand its motives and are not going to succumb to its provocation. Most likely, a person will never admit that he is trying to manipulate you. On the contrary, he will begin to play a sincere resentment or convince you that you are wrong. In no case do not "be led" to such behavior. Even though she cries, though she cries, keep her faithful views. If at least once you show the person that you can manipulate the hems, he will continue to do this for the rest of his life. Vitoge your relationship will turn into a model of the behavior of "lord-slave", where one person does whatever he pleases, and the second unquestioningly agrees and indulges so as not to lose his lover.
When the manipulator notices that the "victim" is not amenable to influence, he can change tactics. In this case, the person begins to fall asleep with compliments, talking about how he needs your support and so much. In this case, also try to think soberly and do not pay attention to his words. Remember that a person is ready to say everything just so that in the end it turned out exactly as he wishes. It is known that girls love ears, so many of the fair sex come across exactly this manipulation. Remember that all these words are a dummy and the person talking is completely insincere, but only to achieve the desired result. If your manipulator chose this form of exposure , openly explain that with beautiful words he will not change anything and you are not going to fulfill his desire just because he called you intelligent and kind. You are certainly kind, but not with those who are trying to force you to do something dishonestly.
Material Wearing
Man can be manipulated not only morally, but also materially. In this case, the manipulator makes a person gifts, gives money and so on, while saying that nothing is needed in return. However, as soon as a situation develops, in which the manipulator needs any help, he immediately turns to her whom he has bestowed and never forgets to recall his gestures. In this case, you should not allow yourself to feel remorse. Of course, if you are honest and kind, the first thought that comes to your mind: "He has done so much for me, how can I refuse?". You should not succumb to such emotions, because your familiar manipulator did all your actions for no reason. His behavior is not selfless, so you can not feel guilty before him. If he would give you presents and make beautiful gestures just like that, then when he comes with a request, he would never mind about it. But in cases when everything is thought out in advance, people always try to press on conscience, remembering the past. Therefore, when your manipulator comes to you with such statements, do not be ashamed to remind him that he himself said: "I do all this for no reason, I do not need anything from you." Naturally, he can begin to explain his actions, declare that he was wrongly understood (or then, or now), but in his behavior with such people it is necessary to remain unshakable. Always remember that you should not initiate anyone. But that such situations do not recur from now on, try not to understand gifts and signs of attention from people you do not know well.
If the manipulator begins to insist that you still have to repay the same coin, do not hesitate to return the person received from him. With such people it is better not to have any debts, even if you know that initially it seems to have been done solely because of good motives. If the manipulator is left with at least a minimal loophole to the levers of psychological influence, he will necessarily use it and will continue to push on you. And as you know, a person who for a long time is an underpsychological press, eventually breaks down and gives the manipulator the opportunity to lead himself and subordinate himself to his opinion and desires.
When there is a manipulator near you, never try to offend him and make mistakes in his motives. In the depths of the soul, each person unerringly feels, wants to manipulate it or not, because manipulation is a psychological influence, through which a person is forced to do things that are contrary to desires. And if you understand that someone provokes you misconduct, which you do not want to do - he's a 100% manipulator. From such people it's better to stay away, because once you break it, you will not be able to stop for a long time and stop fulfilling its wishes. But if for some reason you still want or need to be a knight with a manipulator, stop reacting to his words and behavior. Always show that you perfectly understand the motives and purpose that he pursues, doing his actions and not going to fall under his influence, whatever he does.