Following our advice of a psychologist: how not to cause anger and fighting husband, you, perhaps, save your family from this scourge. Behind the type of psychology and manifestation of aggression, they can be divided into two main types of classification of behavior and outbreaks of aggression: those who attack violently, without cause, and those whose attack causes growing anger, and the manifestation of violence occurs when the so-called "boiling point" is reached.
Consider the first type, which can be attributed to the diagnosis of "antisocial personality disorder." For men who sharply exhibit aggression, for no apparent reason, there is a clear violation of the psyche. An interesting feature is that during an outburst of anger they do not even increase pressure and heartbeat. This proves that violence is so connected with their psychology, as usual, as any ordinary process. The advice of a psychologist regarding her husband with this type of disorder will be few. There are no clear factors that provoke aggression. But in order to understand it, let us consider a consciousness of this type. Such men are obsessed with power and influence over their wife. They are not very attached to it, as to the person, for them the very existence of the victim is important, over which they can show their superiority. If the wife leaves him - he finds himself another victim and the pattern of his behavior will repeat.
In this type of risk to get a group that in childhood was different from sadism towards animals, petty thefts, theft, and then differed in the same antisocial, criminal behavior. First of all, it's a personality disorder. With people of this type it is impossible to live, so if your husband enters into a similar type, it is better to save yourself and your family. Despite the fact that this type is in the minority, it is he who is able to commit the most brutal massacre.
The more common type is one that "warms up" during a scandal, and its behavior can be provoked and provoked, but that does not mean it's normal. The classical representative is tormented between mixed feelings toward his wife. On the one hand, he does not appreciate her, but with another psychologically dependent on her, as a drug. This indicates that the person is eliminated from the personality of the wife, and at the same time is attached to her functions. Unlike the previous type, it is almost impossible for this husband to leave, he tries to control everything and will not allow his wife to divorce, using violence, beating, threats to control the situation. He watches literally every word and step, controls his wife. He is sure that if he does not dominate over her, control and show aggression, his wife will leave him. Spilling out anger on him, beating him, he actually punishes his wife for his own weakness and need for it. In his psychology, there are attitudes that society imposes on him, his imaginary shadows of a "real man". Also for this type is characterized by the curvature of social information. He may misunderstand your words, invent something that does not exist. He is also very jealous, any playful flirting can be perceived as treason, and limit your communication with other people. In a word, he controls you in everything, and if you make him claim or are going to leave - he becomes aggressive. The advice of a psychologist is how not to provoke fights and anger in this case: do not show hostile intentions, do not try to take the dominant position of the husband. It seems to us that all wives are in fact harmless and frightened victims, but this is not always so, because they themselves can show increased aggression, and even more so claims. A man who is prone to violence considers his act to be true, because she herself "ran into" such a reaction, so it is very simple to cause fights with such a husband, a woman should be cautious.
If you are looking for advice of a psychologist, seriously thinking about how not to cause a fight with your husband and how to avoid the anger of your husband, think about whether you need it. Is it necessary to constantly limit, control your behavior right up to inactivity and live with your tyrant husband? Think about your children, this type of person will not be afraid to raise their hand on your child. Remember that "the career of a sadist and rapist" begins when, in the life of the husband, a turning point occurred, when he realized for himself that it was possible to beat. Do not let this happen, if not all is lost. From the first blow, do not forgive or regret your husband, write a statement, take promises in writing, punish, go away for a while, make him ashamed, in a word - let him realize that this will not pass for him, let him feel the horror of this situation. This is not too much, it is necessary measures to not become a victim and a cripple.