Excessive self-love is selfishness, which is fraught with troubles in relationships and broken dreams about a happy future.
Egoism kills families
Some thirty years ago the word "divorce" was abusive. They were afraid of divorce, they were embarrassed, and it never occurred to anyone to flaunt them. Now more than half of families break up from the number that are created. And this happens not only because family values are violated, but also because no one thinks about overcoming selfishness in relations between people.
In principle, there is a certain connection between the decline in the importance of family values and the rise in the level of selfishness. The family is a single organism in which "one for all and all for one." In the family it is important to be able not only to take, but also to give. And the second is more important for building a successful family life. And glossy magazines and secular chronicles on TV promote a completely different type of behavior. Now it is fashionable to find and untwist the oligarch if not for a wedding, then at least for a short relationship with a lot of gifts. Men are also fashionable to pay attention not to the presence of a woman's mind, warmth or developed maternal instincts, but to match the latest fashion trends in the field of appearance. Men are no longer afraid as before, silicone busts or dense lips in the form of pelmeni, they themselves do not mind that their woman has done with them harmful procedures for the sake of short-term beauty.
Selfishness ruins careers
Egoists usually have a consistently high self-esteem, even one can say that it is elevated. In the relationship between people in business, this can be both a plus and a minus.
The plus is that it's easier for egoists to sell themselves. They are more easily extolling their best qualities and skills, and are able to overcome serious competition for the project. This is especially important for spheres that are related to cinema, variety, model business or show business. And in corporations, young talents who know how to submit themselves are sometimes in demand more than modest and intelligent specialists who know their business. But this is only one side of the coin.
The second side is that according to statistics the most successful people in business have a slightly understated evaluation of their achievements. They are always dissatisfied with something in themselves, but are dissatisfied with the little things. This encourages them to infinitely grind their skills and their skills. And even if such an employee does something for the umpteenth time, then the hundredth time he gets better than the ninety-ninth. And the hundred and first time he will make his project better than the hundredth. Smart employers know this, and as for own business, there the market itself will quickly put the man who has gone too far into place.
It is customary to think that successful people in our country initially evoke a negative attitude from others. Especially it, they say, concerns successful businessmen, top managers and entrepreneurs. All this is not so. People who are able to overcome their own selfishness and are able to leave the pedestal on time, finding warm communication with others, can earn millions, and at the same time they will practically have no ill-wishers. That is why overcoming one's own selfishness is one of the important tasks facing any person who is set for a successful career.
How to overcome selfishness
If you know of such a sin as selfish behavior, you must have thought about how to overcome selfishness in relations between people. It all depends on how deeply rooted your selfishness.
If you were the only child and the navel of the land for parents, it would be difficult to overcome egoism. To begin with, you need to go through the heart of the thought that people around you are no less intelligent, meaningful, beautiful, talented than yourself.
Then you should learn to get rid of egocentrism. Through self-centeredness, all children go through their development. This is very important for the formation of a person's personality. The peak of childish egocentrism falls on the age of five to six years. By the school age, egocentricity is overcome by the child, and if this does not happen, then in school he can pick up a lot of "cones" from classmates and teachers. Egocentrism is unwillingness and inability to get in the place of a person. If you notice these features in yourself, the exercises in which you represent yourself in the place of a person will help you, and think how you would behave in his situation. Without mentoring and bragging, you have to try and get used to the skin of your opponent or colleague, friend or acquaintance, and just an accomplice on the blog to understand his thoughts, his supposed steps of action.
Overcoming egoism can be successful if you learn to listen to other people. Just listening is not enough, it is important to be able to talk the interlocutor so that he opens up before you. To do this, you need to learn the technique of active listening. You consciously control your attention to listen not only to the narrative, but also to intonation, to analyze pauses and hesitations, tongue twisters and reservations. All these are small strokes that are capable of conveying a complex description of the situation and the attitude of the interlocutor to it. And by the way, the techniques of active listening by nature are owned by few. So, most likely, you will need efforts to master it. But the result will be first-class: you will notice how the world, which was divided into two types - admirers and envious - suddenly expands and gives you a sea of possibilities. Envious people you can translate into the category of friends and associates on projects, and with admirers you will be able to find such topics for conversation, in which everything can turn upside down. Maybe you will find something in them that you yourself can sincerely admire.
And, finally, it is necessary to say about overcoming the "induced" egoism. So are the personality traits imposed by the media. To get rid of them, you can just for a while throw out all the magazines and turn off the TV. And you can try to build a distance between yourself and the images on the cover, without trying to imitate celebrities.