Analyzing your path, your failures and achievements, a person suddenly discovers that, with his already well-established and prosperous outward appearance, his personality is not perfect. It seems that time is wasted, that so little is done in comparison with what could be done. In other words, a certain revaluation of values takes place, a person critically revises his "I". A person discovers that many things in life can not be changed. You can not change yourself: to educate, change a profession, change your habitual way of life. The crisis of the thirties always carries with it the urgent need to "do something". It indicates the transition of a person to a new age level - the stage of adulthood.
What is the crisis of thirty years?
In fact, the crisis of thirty years in men and women - a very conditional concept. This condition can come a little earlier or a little later, even happen more than once, with short-term influxes.
Men at this time often change their place of work or change their way of life, but their concentration on work and career remains unchanged. The most frequent motive for changing the old place of work is an acute dissatisfaction with something in the usual place - the salary, the situation, the intensity of the schedule.
Women during the crisis of thirty years often change the priorities that they set themselves at the beginning of their early adulthood. Women, previously focused on marriage and the birth of children, are now more attracted to professional goals. Those who previously gave all their strength to self-improvement and work begin to guide them into the bosom of the family.
Surviving such a crisis of thirty years, a person needs to strengthen his niche in a new adult life, a clear confirmation of his status as a held person. He wants to have a decent job, he strives for stability and security. A person is still confident that he can fully realize his hopes and dreams, and tries to do everything for it.
The acuity and drama of the crisis experience can be different. It depends on the temperament of the person. This can be a feeling of internal discomfort, accompanied by a soft, painless process of change. It can be a stormy, very emotional manifestation with serious passions, which, at times lead to a sharp rupture of past relationships. Such a crisis is accompanied by deep feelings, even leads to physical diseases. The most common ailments in this period are depression, insomnia, chronic fatigue, increased anxiety, various unmotivated fears. The easy resolution of the crisis largely depends on how effectively a person can solve his development problems.
Differences between the male and female crisis
Through the crisis, both men and women pass to the same extent, their accents are only shifted. The psychology of men is more directed toward affirmation in the profession. Often the chosen field of activity turns out to be quite different from what would lead to a sense of success. In addition, the 30-year anniversary of the man coincides often with a change of ideals and in itself there is a question of self-identification - do I correspond to these ideals, who am I at the moment now and what will I strive for in the future?
After 30 years, women rethink their social role. Women, who in younger years were focused on marriage, the birth and upbringing of children, are now more engaged in the achievement of professional goals. At the same time, those who previously engaged in only a career, as a rule, try to quickly create a family and give birth to children.
Strong self-confidence and an understanding of one's own competence, as well as the establishment of adequate claims based on one's life experience, provide a person with a sense of satisfaction. People no longer believe selflessly into a miracle, but decide for themselves: "My further success is directly related to the amount of effort that I am willing to make for this." Holding your free time, your favorite hobby allows you to realize all the potential of a person in life. Passage through the inevitable threshold of the 30th anniversary allows a person to change his life abruptly and positively, in order to set clearer goals and priorities in the future. Thirty years is the age of maturity, the flowering of personality. This is the time when the adjustment of life principles and goals makes it possible to carry out even the most ambitious plans.
Psychological and physiological problems
Physiological features of this age (in terms of the work of all body systems) are directly related to the psychological state. Physiologically, in the majority of thirty-year-old women (about 65%), the sex drive reaches its full development. At this level, it will already be about 60 years. True, in some women there is a significant decrease in desire, especially closer to 40 years. In men, however, the need for a sexual life of its highest level reaches 25-30 years. Then there is only a gradual decline. That's why many wives up to 30 years complain that their husbands are too active, even aggressive in bed, and after 30 years often complain about insufficient sexual activity of their husbands.
Externally, adults, thirty-year-old people from a physiological point of view are still growing. By their natural properties, they can be considered teenagers, without even knowing about it. Therefore, young people who have created a family in the middle age of 30-35 years, expects not only the beginning of family life, but also a crisis in terms of its formation. It is at this age that the most frequent conflicts in interpersonal relations are manifested.