"I want to get married!" - 20-year-old girls dream. "It's high time to get married!" - worry 30-year-old mademoiselle. "Urgently married!" - rush 40-year-old women. "Married ..." - doomedly sigh 50-60-year-old ladies. The irrepressible desire of women to be forever bound by the ties of Hymen is relevant at any age. But if the young charmers dream of romantic dreams of marriage, the more mature ladies are guided by the instinctual calculation (biological clock) and the female realization (I am the wife). Today, age-old unmarried women are called self-sufficient, and a few decades ago society would certainly put an insulting stigma: "Old Maid!"
The century has changed - it has become more emancipated, morals have changed - they have been loosened more freely, but women continue to sound an alarm if their treasured ring does not appear on their ring finger in time. Why are "all girlfriends in pairs", although not too good at themselves, do not differ in particular intelligence and do not shine with ingenuity? This question is asked by millions of "long-standing girls" who seek reasons in themselves, in men, or even in corruption and evil eye. To dismiss senseless perplexities, prejudices and superstitions are called upon by psychologists who studied the social "crown of celibacy". They suggest analyzing the behavioral stereotypes of women, whom men do not call in the registrar's office, and to find out why they are trying to get married alone, and others will not be taken into lawful wives ever?
The girl, brought up on fairy tales about princesses, and then on romantic films about love and women's novels, often becomes a hostage to the "fabulous" model of relationships. She is waiting for the prince, who will follow her on a white horse, a Mercedes or an airplane and take him to the far-distant Kingdom. Years go by, the prince wanders through life labyrinths, and the princess continues to build around herself an impregnable fortress, which is guarded with her own hand-nurtured "dragons" in the form of ambitions, tireless self-improvement and exorbitant claims to applicants for the hand and heart. The crux of the problem: The princess is sure that if there is an ideal woman (that is, she), then somewhere there is an ideal man in every respect. She has been trying to match the hypothetical prince all her life, mistakenly believing that the more perfect she becomes, the more she has chances in the elite love market. However, increasing its "price", such a woman turns into an exclusive and expensive "thing" that only a very narrow circle of "buyers" can afford.
Solution of the situation: Of course, do not rush to extremes and lower the bar to "like all normal women." But the beliefs still have to reshape and begin to act. First, take the initiative in your own hands and leave your fortress. Secondly, to expand the circle of interests and to visit more often where there are potential "princes". And, thirdly, to agree to an ordinary, but promising man, and develop to royal ranks together.
"I want to get married, I want to marry!" Do not be afraid, I'll pay for everything! "The words of the famous song show the tactics of many modern women, who are trying not to marry, but to marry their future husband. Everything else they have: the house - a full cup, and a career with conquered peaks, and the status of a secular lioness. It's only in the pursuit of self-sufficiency that they recklessly neglected visits, broke hearts in love, and now they have to call loneliness freedom. Men, of course, admire the "Amazons", but do not marry those who are "themselves with a mustache." The essence of the problem: Nature endowed the man with force, the instincts of the defender, the breadwinner, and entrusted him with the mission to take care of the family. A woman who can do everything herself, he will respect as an equal in strength competitor, but the altar will go with the other. With the one that will allow him to realize his natural potential, which will need his help, and near which he will feel himself a real hero.
Solution of the situation: Amazon, who dreams of marrying, will have to settle for the role of "neck". The head in the relationship should always be a man! However, he does not need to know that the neck is controlling his head. If an Amazonian woman was strong enough and smart enough to become successful, then it should be enough to become more wise.
Women who believe that men dream of marrying only sexual nyacheschka - deeply mistaken. Psychologists, interviewing "no five minutes" of husbands, found that only 20% of the men interviewed, describing their brides, called sexuality the priority. All the others saw in the future wives first of all the characteristics of pious ladies: economic, caring, kind, reliable, faithful, etc. It is noteworthy that more than half of them decided to marry after their choice was approved by close relatives. It is not difficult to guess that it is unlikely that parents, recognizing a daughter-in-law, dreamed of seeing a sex bomb next to their son, followed by a neck and a man's drooling from 16 to 96. The essence of the problem: Contrary to popular belief, men prefer to take cute, but not sexual women. Subconsciously, the future husband wants to be sure that his wife will remain faithful to him, and he will educate his children. In addition, women who enjoy increased popularity with other men, he can consider too attractive to stay with him for a long time.
The solution of the situation: If a woman has appetizing forms, then, of course, one should not hide such beauty under the veil. But it is better to put all the convexities and convexities of the female body in elegant clothes that can emphasize sophistication, and not expose vulgarity. A true woman seduces a man with completely different charms!
It's not strange, but unmarried are those women who, it would seem, are already standing with one foot in the registry office. It's about civil wives. Completely overstep the threshold of the House of Marriage and become the owner of the wedding ring they are hampered by modesty, conservatism or inappropriate patience. Studies of the same psychologists show that waiting for the initiative from men is very unreliable. Civil marriages end with a wedding, if the initiative is taken by the women themselves (explicitly or implicitly). Also, statistics argue that the chances of an official relationship with a woman who agreed to "live together" more than once, are rapidly declining. The crux of the problem: For men, a civil marriage is often a harbor, in which it is convenient to expect the very one that he will offer both his hand, and love, and a campaign under the crown. Civil wives in this case become victims of the created illusion, in which cohabitation is a guarantee of a stamp in the passport. A man, consciously or subconsciously, does not seek to legalize relations, considering marriage a higher level of obligations.
Solution of the situation: Before accepting the offer of a man to live together out of wedlock, the woman must calculate what the chances of a marriage with this man are, and whether the offer to marry will follow. Otherwise, there is a big risk to replenish those statistics, which states that after five years of cohabitation, the chances of becoming a spouse are significantly reduced, and after seven years - zero.