The problems of this plan are usually caused by completely natural physiological and psychological reasons. Both spouses are simply not ready for sexual relations - memories of the pain experienced by a woman are too fresh in memory and the obvious fear of a man to bring suffering to his beloved woman again. But all the difficulties and fears are easily overcome.
Gynecologists advise postpartum abstinence for 6 weeks. This time is necessary for the body of a woman to recover. This applies not only to women who gave birth in a natural way, but gave birth with the help of Caesarean section. Of course, each couple independently determines for themselves the willingness to restore marital relations, but do not rush. Often reasons for concern are far-fetched, but they should be noted. So, how to establish a sex life after birth:
1. Weakened desire is a completely natural condition for the postpartum period. There is no reason for panic or self-flagellation. Love and trusting relationships will help a woman cope with the uncertainty associated with dissatisfaction with her appearance. In addition, it must be remembered that the newly mum experiences a colossal load in the first months, is very tired. Concentration on the child is explained not only by the maternal instinct, but also by the production of a special hormone, prolactin. After a time when the body adapts to new circumstances, he himself will sign.
2. Painful sensations are associated with inadequate production of vaginal lubrication.
The production of vaginal lubrication is reduced because of a decrease in the level of the female hormone estrogen. In this case, especially affected girls, menstruation which comes later than half a year after childbirth. It is the renewal of the cycle that is an indicator of the normal functioning of the reproductive system.
3. Appearance of the postpartum period.
Often, mothers need a sufficient amount of time to get used to their new appearance, to correct the shortcomings that somehow become the companions of the women who gave birth. The mood is spoiled by the ubiquitous stretch marks, which are hard to handle, the sagging tummy and the flabby, lost elasticity of the skin. At this moment, the main thing is not to succumb to stress and do not rush to run to gyms and fitness. Now, as never before, the body of a woman demands the most careful and caring attitude to herself. In the maternity hospital they tell about a complex of exercises that are shown after childbirth. Their implementation will help maintain and strengthen muscles.
4. Relationships of spouses.
Each of them in the postpartum period is cautious. It is natural. Both get used to the role of parents. The spouse tries to behave imperceptibly, not wanting to disturb the already tired wife. Do not be afraid to involve a young dad in caring for a child. It will make life easier for you and relax it.
5. New sensations.
The novelty of sensations from touching to different parts of the body for some women becomes very pleasant, and for a number of others cause discomfort. Only trust and communication will help to relax and return to the old life.
Many women, preparing for maternity, are very worried about the shape of their breasts. In fact, the shape of the breast with the birth of a child and its feeding varies insignificantly and it is quite possible to correct it using special exercises not only after childbirth, but especially during pregnancy. Breast condition, like the appearance of stretch marks, directly depends on the elasticity and elasticity of the skin. Seeking to restore the former beauty of his breast, do not give up breastfeeding! Here you need to approach the problem in a different way. More often put the baby to the chest, be sure to express the remaining milk, which is useful not only for its shape, but also for successful lactation. Do not end breastfeeding abruptly, do not overtighten the chest. This will have a bad effect on her condition. Denial of sexual relations can be caused by the fact that a state of increased excitement can increase the flow of milk, resulting in the formation of milk puddles on the bed. Do not be afraid or embarrassed. All the fault of oxytocin, which causes not only childbirth, but also lactation also at the time of orgasm.
If your relationship has not been overshadowed by the appearance of the child, then the restoration of sexual contact will be painless, no matter how difficult it is to decide and you will not begin to think about how to establish a sexual life after childbirth. If you understand that you are ready for a sexual life:
1. Find the method of contraception that suits both of you. Do not give up protection even if you continue breastfeeding and you have not yet resumed the menstrual cycle. It is proved that the period of lactational amenorrhea does not protect one hundred per cent of repeated pregnancy. There are several methods of contraception: an intrauterine device, birth control pills, condoms and a less effective method - spermicides. Choose a contraceptive that will suit you, a gynecologist will help. Remember that many tablets can not be combined with breastfeeding. It is best to start using condoms in conjunction with additional lubrication. This will not only reduce the manifestations of pain, but also prevent the ingress of bacteria into the vagina, which, when multiplying, can damage uninhabited tissues.
2. Choose the right moment when your child is sleeping or under supervision. Sometimes it is necessary to completely relax. Turn on the music softly, light the candles. Remember how much joy you've had this before and trust your feelings. Do not seek to get an orgasm the first time, think only of the pleasure that you deliver yourself.
The difficulties that have arisen in your relationship can be easily overcome, the main thing is how tender and patient you are to each other!