How to stop loving a man, advice of a psychologist

Love ... Some say it's a disease, others that love is a gift that needs to be sought, experienced in all its forms. Some people avoid non-reciprocal love, others subconsciously enjoy it, because experiencing strong feelings is also a kind of drug. In this case, a man will sit on the hormones of love, which his body produces, from which heat, trembling and exalted emotions ...

When these hormones in the blood are not enough - begins apathy, anguish, pain and anguish, a person is looking for opportunities to see the object of his adoration, get another "dose" of happiness. But sometimes you just want to escape from the abundance of these hormones, from this slavish attachment. The article "How to stop loving a man: advice of a psychologist" will teach you how to get rid of maniacal dependence on the object of worship.

How to stop loving a married man: advice of a psychologist

It is necessary to distinguish between different kinds of love, its different forms. Often, love is confused with attachment, dependence, a desire to compensate for loneliness or a tendency to betray oneself to lofty lyrical fantasies, the subconscious action of the "victim," in order to experience similar feelings and to be part of an authoritative love story, so romantic and tragic. In such moments it is necessary to understand yourself, discover such inclinations and abstract from everything that causes such feelings.

It often seems to us that a person, of course, does not like to experience sadness, pain, etc. But psychologists have proved that this is not so, and we ourselves can notice that sadness and joy are eternal companions of our life. This is due to the fact that we like to be sad, we need it. This does not mean that everyone is a masochist, but it's less like being sad for everyone. But there are people who become dependent on this feeling, and non-reciprocal love that makes them suffer and suffer, really like them, even though they can not admit it. Such people will not want to part with the object of their desires and their subconscious will push them to actions that only strengthen their "doomed" condition. In this case, psychologists advise to stop loving a man and reconsider their views on the current state of things. After all, it's better to start a full-fledged life than to constantly suffer more and more, increasing your "dose". But to say "do not love!" Easily - but how to stop loving a man? Psychologist's advice is extremely necessary in order not to get confused in their desires and problems.

But there are cases of true love, love bitter and gratuitous, non-reciprocal. It happens, sometimes we have to forget the people we love. And it will be much more correct not to lose your time and forget that person who brings pain to you in order to meet that one in the future.

"He turned out to be a moral sadist, how can I forget him now?", "We have no future, but I can not live without it ...", "I love him, I must be with him, I must help him, but ... he does not want to be near me, "" He hates me and we have not seen each other for so long "," He does not respect me at all, treats me like a nonentity, does not pay attention, and I love him so much! .. ", - all excerpts of these letters - only a grain of sand in the desert of bitterness, which brings a similar situation for women. The right way out will be to start a new life, to look for new doors, although it is difficult to get away from the previous life ... So how to stop loving a beloved man? What advice of a psychologist will help us in this situation?

The hardest stage will be to make a decision to break the connection. You yourself must realize that this is really the end of the relationship and they will not bring anything better to you. Your chosen one does not pay attention to you, does not experience romantic feelings in you, you become the initiator of all meetings, you also have an underestimation of self-esteem, you are increasingly returning to thoughts of the past, and thinking about it, experiencing bitterness and anxiety, you can not decide in feelings and do not know what to do, but he does everything as he would like, as he likes ... If among some phrases you have recognized yourself, this is a clear sign that it's time to finish the relationship. Find the strength to part with the past and decide to forget your lover. Often, it depends on it, what will your life be next ...

How to stop loving a man quickly

If you often decide to forget it, but just at these moments it happens that he begins to behave sincerely, to pay attention to you ... Do not lead on this, so you will only strengthen your attachment to him and prove your weakness. Such a decision - like walking in a closed circle, you will always return to your problem, and so you will not escape from it. If you make a decision - be strong and firm in your intentions, make sure that you do not really return to it, create an internal monologue, tell yourself why you should do this and ... decide, no matter how difficult and bitter it seemed .

Sometimes, there are some psychological barriers to forget a man. Something to learn, tell him your opinion - act in such a way as to satisfy that detail that does not let you go. The session of a psychologist or psychotherapist, the presentation of thoughts in a diary, a long conversation with a best friend should help you "prepare" your mind for change. Remember, in this case there are no words "I can not", there is "I do not want" and "I will not".

If you decide to stop loving a man, first destroy everything that reminds you of him - phone number, photos, tear up or burn it and your letters (just burn it, it causes a more contrasting psychological effect). Do not allow yourself to be reminded of him, and all the more you do not need to see him. Talk to your mutual friends so that they do not mention it and do not start talking about it. Find in it bad qualities, visually implement them, imagine using them your unshakable future, project the situation.

When you abstract from everything connected with it, take yourself with something, take care of yourself, go in for sports, learn and work - it will distract you from negative thoughts and serve as the best medicine. Do your creativity, devote yourself to a new idea - and soon you will feel that emptiness is filled, everything falls into place, and you again begin to enjoy life.

But do not let yourself be lonely, act as your heart tells you, fill your soul with love - communicate with friends, relatives, make new acquaintances and when you feel that you are ready, open yourself up for a new relationship. Then your wound is completely cured.

And remember that everything depends on you and on your desire. Time does not heal, you treat yourself, the duration of treatment depends on you. When one door closes, others open, and at times we need to close the old locks ourselves to get into a new, bright future.