Take care of each other . We are accustomed to consider the attributes of great love beautiful gestures - expensive gifts, bouquets of roses and stuff. But to maintain love is much more important than everyday trifles. For example, the husband at the sight of his new wife's dress whistles admiringly. Or the wife, knowing her husband's addiction to good wines, will be ruined to buy the corresponding bottle. However, the way in which the phrase "Good morning!" Is uttered, can make it clear the power of feelings.
True, over the years the routine dulls the attachment, and then it is necessary to pour a new stream into the relationship. One psychologist conducted an experiment: he gave a couple who lived ten years together, a task - during the day they had to do something pleasant to each other and in return receive a coupon from the partner. The goal was to collect an equal number of coupons for both. The game was carried away so much that the couple forgot about the experiment and continued it for no apparent reason. And most importantly, they renewed their relationship to each other.
To find compromises . In happy families, a compromise does not mean that one of the partners makes a sacrifice. For example, the question of how to spend the weekend, it is better to discuss on Thursday, to leave both the opportunity to fulfill their desire and meet their partner. If one wants to go out of town and another to go to a football match, then you can go to the cinema, and on the next day you can go wherever one of the spouses drags. The main thing is that they discuss the problem together, and do not put each other before the fact on Saturday morning.
Understand each other . In families where everything is different, the wife, hearing the sound of the door being opened, immediately begins to complain to her husband about the difficulties that lay on her shoulders: washing, cleaning, raising children and so on. And if the husband responds with his arguments? The outcome is predictable.
In happy families the wife, with the same set of difficulties, at the sound of the door being opened, takes a deep breath and meets her with a smile, and mentally lists all his virtues. At such a moment, there is an exchange of messages: "How are you, dear?" - "How are you, dear?" And only then - details that you no longer want to present in a grumpy and tedious form.
Search for new ways to solve old problems . Often, even in a prosperous family there is a "stumbling block", about which the spouses "stumble" for a long time, then bypassing it, then solving with little or not very losses.
And there is another way that will help to cut this knot once and for all. Finding a third solution that suits both is difficult, but possible. In one family, a longstanding problem was visiting their parents' home, which always ended "on a high note." The decision was suffered, but it suited everyone: the meetings were moved to a neutral territory, where parents could not find an excuse for finding fault and starting to read morals for young people. Tranquility and peace came to the house thanks to a new idea.
Know the limit of the permissible . There are no equal people in the world, even among those who love each other all their lives. Everyone has his "chip", and mutual understanding comes when any partner is aware of this fact. The wife loves to dance, and her husband - to ski. She is afraid of heights and descent from a steep summit does not entice her, but the woman has gained courage and with a smile, more like a grimace of fear, went down a couple of times. He appreciated her act, and in the evening the couple went to the club, where she danced with all her heart, and he yawned with boredom. But the next day no one demanded sacrifices from each other. He went to the ski track, she had fun in the evening, and no one was in charge. The spouses realized that everyone has the right to something of their own, and this does not affect their relationship at all.
Do not forget to joke . Laughter is the easiest and most effective form of stress relief. If you find your source for jokes, known only to two, then the problem will no longer be a problem. Those who are not able to find an excuse for a joke, grow old ahead of time and less accessible in communication. It's easy with those who infect with fun, have a sense of humor and can laugh at themselves. Happy couples can always, say, read together a hilarious passage from the book, because over time they have the same approach to everything, including humor. So they become closer to each other. Well, the most apotheosis - the partners can afford to joke in bed, which, without doubt, strengthens the feelings.
To know each other's thoughts . In happy families, the phrase is unacceptable: "You think that I think ..." Do not take the trouble to think out for a partner. This ungrateful business, the more so that you can and make a mistake. It is best to start a conversation with the question "What do you think ..." and praise yourself if your guess coincided. It will please the partner, and you will have a new opportunity to tell each other the words of love that you always want to hear to any person.